Anonymous
11/01/2011 21:32
Subject: I have officially passed the point of no return re: house full of $h!t
Anonymous wrote:My mother established a rule when we were kids. She would box up things she thought we didn't want or need and put them in the basement, and write the date on the box. If we didn't ask for it, or go looking for it within a year, she got rid of it. A key part is that we all knew about this rule. She didn't box it up in front of us, but we all knew where to look if we were missing something.
I think you could tell your family this new procedure, and easily box up 2 of the lego sets and 2 of the coats, etc and see what they notice is gone.
This! We had our house on the market last year and I boxed up easily half of dc's toys and put them in the basement. Over a three month period, he asked for exactly one item.
Anonymous
11/01/2011 17:57
Subject: Re:I have officially passed the point of no return re: house full of $h!t
A couple of things I have done, successfully are:
1. Play "Put Away". Pick a number and everyone needs to "put away five things, throw away five things and give away five things." For the kids, it starts small, but just by getting 10 things x number of people in the house OUT of the house in donation or trash is worth it.
2. I live in a small house with a husband who had NOTHING as a child (a short time homeless, etc). He brings in EVERYTHING. HE has more than 7 coats. Outside of getting pissed all of the time about the mulitple numbers of things we have (11 flashlights and only four of us in the house), I spend time really LOOKING at our stuff and critically thinking about each item. If I haven't touched it, it gets packed up and stored in the attic or donated / thrown away. I use this to teach the kids about others "less fortunate" also.
3. THROW IT AWAY!!
Good luck - I am right there with ya'!
1. Play "Put Away". Pick a number and everyone needs to "put away five things, throw away five things and give away five things." For the kids, it starts small, but just by getting 10 things x number of people in the house OUT of the house in donation or trash is worth it.
2. I live in a small house with a husband who had NOTHING as a child (a short time homeless, etc). He brings in EVERYTHING. HE has more than 7 coats. Outside of getting pissed all of the time about the mulitple numbers of things we have (11 flashlights and only four of us in the house), I spend time really LOOKING at our stuff and critically thinking about each item. If I haven't touched it, it gets packed up and stored in the attic or donated / thrown away. I use this to teach the kids about others "less fortunate" also.
3. THROW IT AWAY!!
Good luck - I am right there with ya'!
Anonymous
11/01/2011 17:27
Subject: I have officially passed the point of no return re: house full of $h!t
For kids, maybe it would help to talk them through what happens to their donated stuff. So they know those Lego sets aren't just being trashed-instead they are going to go to another family with a little boy who will love and play with them. It might make it easier for him to give them up if he has a vision if what will happen to them. If he's a sensitive kid (sounds like he might be from the sentimental attachment) he might really get into the idea that his old toys will get more attention in a new house and he'll be helping another kid who might not have as much as him.
Anonymous
11/01/2011 17:04
Subject: I have officially passed the point of no return re: house full of $h!t
Why are the Legos kept as sets? Dump all Legos together in one bin so the kids can be creative with them.
Anonymous
11/01/2011 16:48
Subject: I have officially passed the point of no return re: house full of $h!t
Anonymous wrote:Guys, my problem isn't that I can't bear to purge filthy dog toys or donate toddler clothes or formal wear that I wore when I was 28.
My problem is that every member of our household is **attached** to their things. So,
Organizer: I see you have 4 Lego sets here and all of them are red and blue. Keep two, and choose two to put in the give-away bin.
Me: Uh, how about these two?
Son: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I love ALL FOUR LEGO SETS AND I PLAY WITH THEM.
Organizer: Let's purge some of your husbands coats that are squashed in the closet too tightly.
Me: Ok, but I'm not really sure which can stay and which can go, because I am not my husband and I don't know which need truly needs.
Husband: I need all 7 coats because they serve different functions, and I honestly will wear all 7 at various points during 2012.
- - - -
Now multiply this times 300. It's the "human" barrier. I don't know how to blow through it without literally trampling people's feelings.
I'm looking for THOSE kinds of suggestions. Please, I swear I'll implement them.
When I was child, my purging, minimalist mom decided one day to throw out my horse statue collection while I was at school, since it was "clutter." Later she sold at a fire sale price all of my father's class rings and pins that had sentimental value to him -- without asking.
I need to avoid things such as that.
Where do people in Manhattan keep their class rings and horse statuette collections? Do they just not buy them in the first place? Move to Jersey? What?
I obviously was on DCUM in my sleep and posted this..
Anonymous
11/01/2011 14:09
Subject: I have officially passed the point of no return re: house full of $h!t
My mother established a rule when we were kids. She would box up things she thought we didn't want or need and put them in the basement, and write the date on the box. If we didn't ask for it, or go looking for it within a year, she got rid of it. A key part is that we all knew about this rule. She didn't box it up in front of us, but we all knew where to look if we were missing something.
I think you could tell your family this new procedure, and easily box up 2 of the lego sets and 2 of the coats, etc and see what they notice is gone.
I think you could tell your family this new procedure, and easily box up 2 of the lego sets and 2 of the coats, etc and see what they notice is gone.
Anonymous
11/01/2011 13:56
Subject: Re:I have officially passed the point of no return re: house full of $h!t
OP, I hear you and am in the same boat.
One suggestion is to get your family to reduce their objects by just 10% at a time. 10% doesn't seem too scary! So if they have a horse collection that they truly love, try to get them to winnow just one pony from the herd.
This will help your family learn to get rid of stuff and that the process doesn't have to be devastating.
Help them see the benefits of getting rid of stuff. DH loves all his 7 coats, OK. But one must be less useful than the other six, and by having one fewer coat you will have more space to hang them.
For three dimensional artwork, get a display case that hangs on the wall. Child can put current work there. When it is full it is full. if child brings home new work, something from display case needs to go into storage. Implement that 10% (work your way up to 25%) rule here too.
One suggestion is to get your family to reduce their objects by just 10% at a time. 10% doesn't seem too scary! So if they have a horse collection that they truly love, try to get them to winnow just one pony from the herd.
This will help your family learn to get rid of stuff and that the process doesn't have to be devastating.
Help them see the benefits of getting rid of stuff. DH loves all his 7 coats, OK. But one must be less useful than the other six, and by having one fewer coat you will have more space to hang them.
For three dimensional artwork, get a display case that hangs on the wall. Child can put current work there. When it is full it is full. if child brings home new work, something from display case needs to go into storage. Implement that 10% (work your way up to 25%) rule here too.