glad I'm not your daughter...

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assign chores that take her (about) the same amount of time you spent waiting. The equivalent of things you could have been doing if you weren't sitting in your car...

But obviously get her safely picked up and make sure there aren't extenuating circumstances first.

Yes to both of these

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Young teen is not where she said she would be when I told her I was picking her up at a certain. The only consequence is that I’m out on a week night wasting my time waiting for her. I don’t want to be mad at her. Just want a quick easy punishment that helps her remember not to do this to me. My brain is fried though. What’s appropriate?

Have your tried TALKING TO YOUR DAUGHTER?

Has the DAUGHTER TRIED TALKING TO HER MOM TO TELL HER WHERE SHE WOULD BE?

Seriously, if the kid gets in the car and says “sorry, there was a huge fight at the place we were at and the police were called, we had to move fast and I couldn’t text” then obviously that is different. But most likely she just got caught up in herself and didn’t text.

Our job is to teach our kids to be adults. If you move and someone is picking you up you need to let them know. This is the basics of parenting. I am just shocked by how many people think this should be the mom’s problem instead of the kid’s.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it is a one off, give a warning. The one time my DS16 missed a curfew (by hours), he was helping a kid get through a suicidal moment and wouldn't respond to texts. He never told me, and I punished him. A year later the kid confided in my DD how valuable my son was to him that night. I wish I had given a warning instead of punishing.

A true bro will go 100% on the alibi.

OP I also simmer and seethe when I am picking up and am "losing time" or "wasting time" when I could be doing something else.

For your blood pressure and the mental health of your kids, let it go.

Anonymous wrote:Young teen is not where she said she would be when I told her I was picking her up at a certain. The only consequence is that I’m out on a week night wasting my time waiting for her. I don’t want to be mad at her. Just want a quick easy punishment that helps her remember not to do this to me. My brain is fried though. What’s appropriate?

Pick one of the punishments you give yourself when you make a mistake?

Oh..

Anonymous wrote:Young teen is not where she said she would be when I told her I was picking her up at a certain. The only consequence is that I’m out on a week night wasting my time waiting for her. I don’t want to be mad at her. Just want a quick easy punishment that helps her remember not to do this to me. My brain is fried though. What’s appropriate?

Have your tried TALKING TO YOUR DAUGHTER?

Anonymous wrote:If it is a one off, give a warning. The one time my DS16 missed a curfew (by hours), he was helping a kid get through a suicidal moment and wouldn't respond to texts. He never told me, and I punished him. A year later the kid confided in my DD how valuable my son was to him that night. I wish I had given a warning instead of punishing.

A true bro will go 100% on the alibi.

If it is a one off, give a warning. The one time my DS16 missed a curfew (by hours), he was helping a kid get through a suicidal moment and wouldn't respond to texts. He never told me, and I punished him. A year later the kid confided in my DD how valuable my son was to him that night. I wish I had given a warning instead of punishing.

Anonymous wrote:Geez, you PPs are nuts. The kid just inconsiderately missed the pickup time/place. No big deal. The OP was requesting a suggestion for a minor consequence for the minor carelessness.

+100

Are people even parenting anymore?

Does she have a phone? Just text her.

Geez, you PPs are nuts. The kid just inconsiderately missed the pickup time/place. No big deal. The OP was requesting a suggestion for a minor consequence for the minor carelessness.

I am going to along with the others, one time is a mistake vs the 5th time (what’s she hiding?)

Was she intentionally misleading you? Or did she tell you to pick up at Chipotle and forgot to text you that they decided to walk to Starbucks and the pick up location changed. Then maybe you need to relax a little.