where/how did she meet him? That would be my big concern.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The same happened with my grandma. They got married at 88 and had some happy years together before he passed. He did have money and it was a life saver for her.

Only thing was his family was upset about the money going to her.

They had met when they were young and reconnected in their 80s. She probably should have married him not my grandpa, but such is life. I am glad they still had time together to be happy.

So your parents and aunts and uncles get his money instead of his kids. Nice.

Maybe he didn't want his kids to have it. Maybe they cut him off years ago. Maybe the PP's family welcomed him, cared about him and made his last few years happy ones.

Considering the current trend of cutting off parents, I think there are going to be a lot more surprises like this at will-reading time.

Or also weird to assume my grandma would be selfish and not give money to his family when she died.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The same happened with my grandma. They got married at 88 and had some happy years together before he passed. He did have money and it was a life saver for her.

Only thing was his family was upset about the money going to her.

They had met when they were young and reconnected in their 80s. She probably should have married him not my grandpa, but such is life. I am glad they still had time together to be happy.

So your parents and aunts and uncles get his money instead of his kids. Nice.

Maybe he didn't want his kids to have it. Maybe they cut him off years ago. Maybe the PP's family welcomed him, cared about him and made his last few years happy ones.

Considering the current trend of cutting off parents, I think there are going to be a lot more surprises like this at will-reading time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he can't get his hands on her cash.

Also make sure she's on birth control.

My God, she is 81 years old. She is in decline now, so she will not be a viable caregiver to him later. Let her have fun.

🤣🤣🤣🤣
Birth control??

For an 81YO??

I think at this age, people are more invested in companionship vs. sex.

Not birth control but OP should buy her condoms. STDs are rampant among these old boomers.

81 is not a boomer.

Didn’t miss it by much. Oldest boomers turn 80 this year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he can't get his hands on her cash.

Also make sure she's on birth control.

My God, she is 81 years old. She is in decline now, so she will not be a viable caregiver to him later. Let her have fun.

🤣🤣🤣🤣
Birth control??

For an 81YO??

I think at this age, people are more invested in companionship vs. sex.

Not birth control but OP should buy her condoms. STDs are rampant among these old boomers.

81 is not a boomer.

Anonymous wrote:The same happened with my grandma. They got married at 88 and had some happy years together before he passed. He did have money and it was a life saver for her.

Only thing was his family was upset about the money going to her.

They had met when they were young and reconnected in their 80s. She probably should have married him not my grandpa, but such is life. I am glad they still had time together to be happy.

So your parents and aunts and uncles get his money instead of his kids. Nice.

There’s been an interesting thread on College Confidential similar to this theme. Search “Octogenarian romance”

Jump in with both feet. Ask her where she wants to go for a date, what's she going to wear, etc. You want her to feel comfortable sharing innocuous information and then if there are any concerns, you've got an open door.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he can't get his hands on her cash.

Also make sure she's on birth control.

My God, she is 81 years old. She is in decline now, so she will not be a viable caregiver to him later. Let her have fun.

🤣🤣🤣🤣
Birth control??

For an 81YO??

I think at this age, people are more invested in companionship vs. sex.

Not birth control but OP should buy her condoms. STDs are rampant among these old boomers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he can't get his hands on her cash.

Also make sure she's on birth control.

My God, she is 81 years old. She is in decline now, so she will not be a viable caregiver to him later. Let her have fun.

🤣🤣🤣🤣
Birth control??

For an 81YO??

I think at this age, people are more invested in companionship vs. sex.

Sadly a lot of old people are having sex thanks to viagra et al. and it’s one of the largest populations suffering STDs. Pregnancy isn’t the concern and the age group is less likely to utilize condoms.

“Sexually transmitted disease (STD) diagnoses are surging among older adults. Over the past decade, rates of chlamydia, gonorrhea, and syphilis have soared among Americans 55 and older, with cases of chlamydia tripling and gonorrhea increasing sixfold in those 65 and older.”

Anonymous wrote:Make sure he can't get his hands on her cash.

Also make sure she's on birth control.

My God, she is 81 years old. She is in decline now, so she will not be a viable caregiver to him later. Let her have fun.

🤣🤣🤣🤣
Birth control??

For an 81YO??

I think at this age, people are more invested in companionship vs. sex.

While your feelings on this are 1000% valid & I would feel the same way that you do, the best thing you can do for your Mother right now is voice + address your concerns, but let her make her own decisions.

Easier said than done I know - - you can monitor the situation from a distance & let your Mother know that if she needs anything from you, that you will always be close by should the need arise. ❤️

The same happened with my grandma. They got married at 88 and had some happy years together before he passed. He did have money and it was a life saver for her.

Only thing was his family was upset about the money going to her.

They had met when they were young and reconnected in their 80s. She probably should have married him not my grandpa, but such is life. I am glad they still had time together to be happy.