Anonymous
05/20/2026 08:38
Subject: Toxic Coach
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would post the club and initials on here so people know to stay away
THIS PLEASE
CC - ED - JJ - NE - MJ at VRSC
MR JOH MH MS PL RP at LOUDOUN
AB at TSJ
VALOR lol
Are JJ, NE, and MJ no longer at VRSC? I don't see them on the website.
Are RP, PL, MR, MH, JOH no longer at Loudoun? I don't see them on the website.
Is FU still at STFU?
Anonymous
05/20/2026 07:52
Subject: Toxic Coach
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would post the club and initials on here so people know to stay away
THIS PLEASE
CC - ED - JJ - NE - MJ at VRSC
MR JOH MH MS PL RP at LOUDOUN
AB at TSJ
VALOR lol
Are JJ, NE, and MJ no longer at VRSC? I don't see them on the website.
Are RP, PL, MR, MH, JOH no longer at Loudoun? I don't see them on the website.
Anonymous
05/19/2026 23:51
Subject: Toxic Coach
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:I would post the club and initials on here so people know to stay away
THIS PLEASE
CC - ED - JJ - NE - MJ at VRSC
MR JOH MH MS PL RP at LOUDOUN
AB at TSJ
VALOR lol
Anonymous
05/19/2026 11:04
Subject: Toxic Coach
What kind of parent would put up with it. Just pick up and leave, not the end of the world. There are tons of abusive coaches and we have seen them at all levels.
Anonymous
05/18/2026 10:29
Subject: Toxic Coach
Could your child switch to a different team within the club? Even if it means down a level or up an age group? I've seen a few girls stop loving the game during these toxic coach years (e.g., upset before practice or internalizing the coaches comments) - and they then needed a full year or more to rebuild their confidence, love of the game, etc. at a different club and lower level competition.
Anonymous
05/18/2026 08:20
Subject: Toxic Coach
We left a club due to a toxic coach. DS was actually one of the players that the coach liked, but the way the coach spoke to some of the other kids and the team as a whole was not OK. We didn’t want DS to think that was normal or acceptable. He ended up on a team that was probably a bit of a step down just to get away from that situation. We are trying to make parenting choices with the long run in mind, not what will lead to short-term success on a soccer field. I want a well-adjusted young adult after all of this is done.
Anonymous
05/18/2026 07:48
Subject: Toxic Coach
Anonymous wrote:We have encountered many toxic clubs and coaches over the years as my DD is now near the end of the road. It simply amazes me how many families not only put up with but jump through hoops to join these clubs. They think they are getting some kind of advantage to their ultimate dream of D1 soccer for their daughter but now from the other side I see how ridiculous that was. If your daughter has the talent then she holds the power not the club. It’s those other players, who are good but not great, who are the ones seeking out these toxic clubs because they think it will be worth it in the end (it won’t). It’s really a shame how many girls waste, yes waste, their formative years in these toxic places chasing the wrong things.
Yes. It is a waste for time and I would not even call D1 a dream. What is the average salary of a D1 graduate??
Anonymous
05/18/2026 07:15
Subject: Toxic Coach
This right here is why I prioritize a well recommended coach and club over whether it’s ECNL or GA or whatever. The coach and teammates are more important.
Anonymous
05/18/2026 07:08
Subject: Toxic Coach
If it is mental abuse, you can usually document it and bring it up to the TD. Even if they do not act, you can also make a case directly to MLS NEXT or similar. They do not tolerate that kind of behavior, and they do investigate complaints seriously.
Anonymous
05/18/2026 07:01
Subject: Toxic Coach
We have encountered many toxic clubs and coaches over the years as my DD is now near the end of the road. It simply amazes me how many families not only put up with but jump through hoops to join these clubs. They think they are getting some kind of advantage to their ultimate dream of D1 soccer for their daughter but now from the other side I see how ridiculous that was. If your daughter has the talent then she holds the power not the club. It’s those other players, who are good but not great, who are the ones seeking out these toxic clubs because they think it will be worth it in the end (it won’t). It’s really a shame how many girls waste, yes waste, their formative years in these toxic places chasing the wrong things.
Anonymous
05/18/2026 05:02
Subject: Toxic Coach
Leave the club and most importantly talk to your kid. This is not a sport that guarantees your child a 6 figure job nor does it place in a T-20 or even 50 school . Unfortunately we parents make these abusive coaches feel like the world is at their mercy.
Coaches in the community are doing a great job teaching kids a sport and that’s great but in the end, this is not a pro academy in Europe or a top school pipeline. Focus on more important things in life.
Coaches in the community are doing a great job teaching kids a sport and that’s great but in the end, this is not a pro academy in Europe or a top school pipeline. Focus on more important things in life.
Anonymous
05/17/2026 23:10
Subject: Toxic Coach
Anonymous
05/17/2026 21:25
Subject: Re:Toxic Coach
Our son had a toxic coach and team and played even harder than ever to earn his playing time. The reverberations of the toxic abuse are far reaching and after leaving that team for a top MLSN1 club our son has suffered the mental anguish of feeling he’s not good enough and seeking extrinsic versus intrinsic motivations. Leave as fast as you can and never go back!!!! Our boy is U14 and has to move to a different club next year bc his game has suffered. He will fight back but u15 would have been a huge year for him. We let this happen! We were complicit!! So sad.
Anonymous
05/17/2026 20:37
Subject: Toxic Coach
Most of the times these are the TD or DOC or whoever, so yes just leaving is the best option. It won't change.
Anonymous
05/17/2026 20:34
Subject: Toxic Coach
Anonymous wrote:How have you helped your DC navigate a toxic coach? Favoritism (for kids who did not earn it in training or in games), anger management issues, belittling, no objective analysis, name calling without constructive criticism, etc. DD is super tough, serious, a hard worker, and wants to continue playing at the highest level.
Why would you continue to send your DD to a place where she is constantly being belittled? Please quit immediately.