Anonymous wrote:The doctor will usually tell you. For my kids in DC, it was age 15, although I think kids are given the option at 14 to start.

This is how our practice works. I can't remember if it was 13 or 14, but they would have the kid start back alone and then call me for recap/questions.

How are they going to ask about sexual activity, abuse if parent is in room?

When you can no longer fly or drive to where they live for each medical appointment?

Anonymous wrote:I would go in until my kids asked me not to. Especially given all we know now about abuse in medical settings, you honestly cannot be too careful.

This. I always ask. My DC is a college freshman and still wants me to go in sometimes (sometimes not), depending on what it is.

At DS’ last checkup, age 14, I stayed in the room for the first part of the exam (vitals, growth, general chitchat about school and sleep habits and so forth, measurements to track an ongoing minor issue). Then the doctor had me step out of the room so they could have a private chat and DS could ask any confidential questions.

At some point in the next couple of years I’ll start letting him do the whole exam by himself, and just check in briefly with the doctor at the end.

My DD is 18 and she asks that I be in the room for some visits. She decides which ones...

When my kid turned 13 I stepped out for part of the exam and to give him a chance to talk to the dr without me if he needed to.

Anonymous wrote:It was always a process for us. Depending on the kid, sometime between 10-12 they’re offered the opportunity to spend part of the appointment privately with the doctor. By mid teens they decide when they want me to come in or not. I think if you have a good pediatrician it’s not a good idea to insist on always going in. How will your kid navigate care in college and beyond. Your pediatrician should be a partner in teaching your kid what appropriate care is and is not.

If kids are on your insurance, the training wheels will come off when they are no longer on the insurance.

It was always a process for us. Depending on the kid, sometime between 10-12 they’re offered the opportunity to spend part of the appointment privately with the doctor. By mid teens they decide when they want me to come in or not. I think if you have a good pediatrician it’s not a good idea to insist on always going in. How will your kid navigate care in college and beyond. Your pediatrician should be a partner in teaching your kid what appropriate care is and is not.

Anonymous wrote:18, or when they ask.

This. But I step out briefly so they can talk. I only take my daughters to female pediatricians. For all other doctors visits, I have stayed in the room. I’m a doc and I kinda like seeing how the doctor works and to ask the right questions

at 13 our doctor asked that our kids start filling out behavioral health questions by themselves and they went over the questionnaire together without me. This seemed appropriate.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2 sons here. Around the age of 13, I would be in the examining room for the first part of the exam, and then, the doctor would ask me to step out. My kids told me he spoke about drugs and being safe(drugs, bike helmets,vaping, etc) and if they had any questions. This mini meeting was about 5 minutes. I wasn’t worried about abuse, my kids weren’t little at the point.

Yup, we started the brief step out at 13 with my daughter and son. The quick check of privates is done with me in the room but with a sheet covering them. I was still in the room for most of DS's visit at 15. We will see what happens at 16th visit.

I think ours started at about age 11 or 12, but there was a nurse in the room as well. And the (female) doctor asked DD directly if she'd be comfortable with me stepping out at the end.

Pretty sure they covered the same kinds of things: basic personal safety issues. But I do think at that age, it's a way to start setting up that environment of trust, so patients will feel comfortable discussing more serious issues later.

Just had my 15 year old's check up. When the Dr. checked his privates he asked if he wanted me to step out. He said he didn't care, so I just turned my head away and the doctor looked in his shorts for a second. The doctor did ask me to step out for a few minutes when asking him some questions.

I go in w/ my teen DC every time, we talk with the nurse, then the dr during vitals/early part of the exam. Then I leave to go in to the waiting room while the physical exam takes place so they can have privacy.

18 for sure. No paedos will be alone with my DD