Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 11:02     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:He usually does listen to our daughter and knew what expectations were, he did fine last time we left for five days. Another problem is that since he’d spend longer on devices, he wouldn’t get up and get ready for school on time, affecting them. Our daughter took the devices away by the end so when we came back, at 3pm on day four, things were better. She wouldn’t let him get on the electronics, and he would constantly ask her about it.


Next time you leave, take his devices with you, problem solved. But why are you leaving your kids for several days multiple times? That is odd

Family and work obligations. Kids have school, so they can’t come. We don’t pay our daughter, but we do want to reward her for handling our sons misbehavior well.


What did you do about family and work obligations just a couple of years ago when your 18 year old was too young to be your stand in?



We had a close friend stay over during the nights, made sure they got ready for school in the morning, left for work, and come back at 6.


ha! Did you pay this person? What is going on with you and your spouse that you can't manage to have one of you home to take care of your own damn children?
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 11:01     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
This post has to be a joke.

What your 18 year old should do is let the 11 year old do whatever because it should not be her responsibility or problem and then she should throw a giant party in your house.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 11:01     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:He usually does listen to our daughter and knew what expectations were, he did fine last time we left for five days. Another problem is that since he’d spend longer on devices, he wouldn’t get up and get ready for school on time, affecting them. Our daughter took the devices away by the end so when we came back, at 3pm on day four, things were better. She wouldn’t let him get on the electronics, and he would constantly ask her about it.


Next time you leave, take his devices with you, problem solved. But why are you leaving your kids for several days multiple times? That is odd

Family and work obligations. Kids have school, so they can’t come. We don’t pay our daughter, but we do want to reward her for handling our sons misbehavior well.


What did you do about family and work obligations just a couple of years ago when your 18 year old was too young to be your stand in?



We had a close friend stay over during the nights, made sure they got ready for school in the morning, left for work, and come back at 6.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:58     Subject: Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
I've been 11. What kid of 11-year old makes their sibling's life harder when parents are not at home? Immature or something else.
He should have told her that he'd be on his best behavior.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:51     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:He usually does listen to our daughter and knew what expectations were, he did fine last time we left for five days. Another problem is that since he’d spend longer on devices, he wouldn’t get up and get ready for school on time, affecting them. Our daughter took the devices away by the end so when we came back, at 3pm on day four, things were better. She wouldn’t let him get on the electronics, and he would constantly ask her about it.


Next time you leave, take his devices with you, problem solved. But why are you leaving your kids for several days multiple times? That is odd

Family and work obligations. Kids have school, so they can’t come. We don’t pay our daughter, but we do want to reward her for handling our sons misbehavior well.


What did you do about family and work obligations just a couple of years ago when your 18 year old was too young to be your stand in?

Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:27     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:He usually does listen to our daughter and knew what expectations were, he did fine last time we left for five days. Another problem is that since he’d spend longer on devices, he wouldn’t get up and get ready for school on time, affecting them. Our daughter took the devices away by the end so when we came back, at 3pm on day four, things were better. She wouldn’t let him get on the electronics, and he would constantly ask her about it.


Next time you leave, take his devices with you, problem solved. But why are you leaving your kids for several days multiple times? That is odd

Family and work obligations. Kids have school, so they can’t come. We don’t pay our daughter, but we do want to reward her for handling our sons misbehavior well.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:22     Subject: Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
I feel like this is highly embellished or didn't happen at all.

Copy & pasted from redditt at best.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:20     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
It's totally inappropriate to ask your 18 year old to do your job as the parent for multiple days. Beyond.

Pay her, don't do it again, and take the 11 year old's screens away.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:18     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:He usually does listen to our daughter and knew what expectations were, he did fine last time we left for five days. Another problem is that since he’d spend longer on devices, he wouldn’t get up and get ready for school on time, affecting them. Our daughter took the devices away by the end so when we came back, at 3pm on day four, things were better. She wouldn’t let him get on the electronics, and he would constantly ask her about it.


What was so important that you went away that long. This is unfair to her.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:17     Subject: Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:What was so important you'd leave three kids alone? Why do you need to crowd source this? He loses electronics for a week. You pay her $1K.


This. But I wouldn’t pay $1000. It’s their own child and 2/3 kids are teens. Her compensation shouldn’t be equal to if you outsourced this to a someone else. I’d pay her $300-500.


It’s inappropriate to expect an 18 year old to parent for 4-5 days. 1k minimum.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:16     Subject: Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:What was so important you'd leave three kids alone? Why do you need to crowd source this? He loses electronics for a week. You pay her $1K.


This. But I wouldn’t pay $1000. It’s their own child and 2/3 kids are teens. Her compensation shouldn’t be equal to if you outsourced this to a someone else. I’d pay her $300-500.


You don’t leave four kids home alone for four days.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:10     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:He usually does listen to our daughter and knew what expectations were, he did fine last time we left for five days. Another problem is that since he’d spend longer on devices, he wouldn’t get up and get ready for school on time, affecting them. Our daughter took the devices away by the end so when we came back, at 3pm on day four, things were better. She wouldn’t let him get on the electronics, and he would constantly ask her about it.


Next time you leave, take his devices with you, problem solved. But why are you leaving your kids for several days multiple times? That is odd
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 10:09     Subject: Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Anonymous wrote:Why would you pay your kid for watching siblings? That’s crazy to me. In my family, it was just an expectation that we’d care for younger kids as needed.

Sounds like the younger one was anxious and pushing boundaries. Pretty normal.


I don’t think it’s normal to leave your kids for multiple days with a teen sibling in charge. I’d pay her at least something, but not 1,000
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 09:32     Subject: Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
Why would you pay your kid for watching siblings? That’s crazy to me. In my family, it was just an expectation that we’d care for younger kids as needed.

Sounds like the younger one was anxious and pushing boundaries. Pretty normal.
Anonymous
Post 04/10/2026 09:25     Subject: Re:Reward for DD & Punishment for DS
No more screens for him.