Anonymous wrote:Not sure where to post this, but here it is. Feel free to delete it or move it as you see fit.

We have a great kid—curious, kind, and genuinely loves learning. They’ve always been strong academically, especially in math and public policy, and they care deeply about the environment. They also value their friendships and enjoy being around people.

At the same time, they’ve been navigating ADHD and some depression in college. The depression is under control now, which we’re very grateful for, but ADHD continues to make certain things—especially getting started on tasks and following through—much harder than it might appear from the outside.

The biggest challenge isn’t ability—it’s initiation. Once they get going, they do very well. With accommodations and support, their grades have been solid. In fact, they routinely score 100/100 on college math exams, which still amazes us. They’re also the captain of their mock trial team at a top academic college, and on weekends they create and sell street art, donating most of what they earn to charity. There’s a lot to be proud of.

But when it comes to planning ahead—especially things like internships—it’s a different story. Last year, they found a part-time summer job at a law firm at the last minute, sometime in May. This year, they haven’t really started looking, or at least haven’t been able to fully engage in the process.

We understand that internships are increasingly competitive, and we don’t see it as a failure if they don’t secure one this summer. We’d be perfectly happy if they stayed home, spent time with friends, traveled a bit, and maybe volunteered with organizations they care about. We can always help them put together a meaningful summer.

At the same time, we wonder if we should be encouraging them more actively to pursue something related to their interests—something that could help build toward a future career—or if it’s better to step back and let them find their own pace.

They’ve said, half-jokingly, “I could rule the world without ADHD.” And honestly, we see what they mean—the potential is clearly there. But the reality is that they’re taking things day by day, without much long-term planning right now.

As parents, we’re trying to figure out where the balance is—between supporting, nudging, and simply accepting where they are. What would you do?

Anonymous wrote:Could some please recommend a EF coach for my college kid?

The other day I saw a video of a race between a giant tortoise and a bunny. It instantly reminded me of my kid - who is obviously the bunny who has great speed but is constantly distracted. Sigh!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure where to post this, but here it is. Feel free to delete it or move it as you see fit.

We have a great kid—curious, kind, and genuinely loves learning. They’ve always been strong academically, especially in math and public policy, and they care deeply about the environment. They also value their friendships and enjoy being around people.

At the same time, they’ve been navigating ADHD and some depression in college. The depression is under control now, which we’re very grateful for, but ADHD continues to make certain things—especially getting started on tasks and following through—much harder than it might appear from the outside.

The biggest challenge isn’t ability—it’s initiation. Once they get going, they do very well. With accommodations and support, their grades have been solid. In fact, they routinely score 100/100 on college math exams, which still amazes us. They’re also the captain of their mock trial team at a top academic college, and on weekends they create and sell street art, donating most of what they earn to charity. There’s a lot to be proud of.

But when it comes to planning ahead—especially things like internships—it’s a different story. Last year, they found a part-time summer job at a law firm at the last minute, sometime in May. This year, they haven’t really started looking, or at least haven’t been able to fully engage in the process.

We understand that internships are increasingly competitive, and we don’t see it as a failure if they don’t secure one this summer. We’d be perfectly happy if they stayed home, spent time with friends, traveled a bit, and maybe volunteered with organizations they care about. We can always help them put together a meaningful summer.

At the same time, we wonder if we should be encouraging them more actively to pursue something related to their interests—something that could help build toward a future career—or if it’s better to step back and let them find their own pace.

They’ve said, half-jokingly, “I could rule the world without ADHD.” And honestly, we see what they mean—the potential is clearly there. But the reality is that they’re taking things day by day, without much long-term planning right now.

As parents, we’re trying to figure out where the balance is—between supporting, nudging, and simply accepting where they are. What would you do?

What’s with the they? You don’t want to say if it’s a male or female so we can’t figure out who it is?

Or maybe that’s their preferred pronouns. Either way, why do you care??

It’s difficult to read and a distraction.

I find it helpful to have people use gender neutral pronouns. I sometimes discount helpful responses when a poster talks about a kid who is a DS when I am here about my DD. If I don’t know the gender, I read more objectively.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure where to post this, but here it is. Feel free to delete it or move it as you see fit.

We have a great kid—curious, kind, and genuinely loves learning. They’ve always been strong academically, especially in math and public policy, and they care deeply about the environment. They also value their friendships and enjoy being around people.

At the same time, they’ve been navigating ADHD and some depression in college. The depression is under control now, which we’re very grateful for, but ADHD continues to make certain things—especially getting started on tasks and following through—much harder than it might appear from the outside.

The biggest challenge isn’t ability—it’s initiation. Once they get going, they do very well. With accommodations and support, their grades have been solid. In fact, they routinely score 100/100 on college math exams, which still amazes us. They’re also the captain of their mock trial team at a top academic college, and on weekends they create and sell street art, donating most of what they earn to charity. There’s a lot to be proud of.

But when it comes to planning ahead—especially things like internships—it’s a different story. Last year, they found a part-time summer job at a law firm at the last minute, sometime in May. This year, they haven’t really started looking, or at least haven’t been able to fully engage in the process.

We understand that internships are increasingly competitive, and we don’t see it as a failure if they don’t secure one this summer. We’d be perfectly happy if they stayed home, spent time with friends, traveled a bit, and maybe volunteered with organizations they care about. We can always help them put together a meaningful summer.

At the same time, we wonder if we should be encouraging them more actively to pursue something related to their interests—something that could help build toward a future career—or if it’s better to step back and let them find their own pace.

They’ve said, half-jokingly, “I could rule the world without ADHD.” And honestly, we see what they mean—the potential is clearly there. But the reality is that they’re taking things day by day, without much long-term planning right now.

As parents, we’re trying to figure out where the balance is—between supporting, nudging, and simply accepting where they are. What would you do?

What’s with the they? You don’t want to say if it’s a male or female so we can’t figure out who it is?

Or maybe that’s their preferred pronouns. Either way, why do you care??

It’s difficult to read and a distraction.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure where to post this, but here it is. Feel free to delete it or move it as you see fit.

We have a great kid—curious, kind, and genuinely loves learning. They’ve always been strong academically, especially in math and public policy, and they care deeply about the environment. They also value their friendships and enjoy being around people.

At the same time, they’ve been navigating ADHD and some depression in college. The depression is under control now, which we’re very grateful for, but ADHD continues to make certain things—especially getting started on tasks and following through—much harder than it might appear from the outside.

The biggest challenge isn’t ability—it’s initiation. Once they get going, they do very well. With accommodations and support, their grades have been solid. In fact, they routinely score 100/100 on college math exams, which still amazes us. They’re also the captain of their mock trial team at a top academic college, and on weekends they create and sell street art, donating most of what they earn to charity. There’s a lot to be proud of.

But when it comes to planning ahead—especially things like internships—it’s a different story. Last year, they found a part-time summer job at a law firm at the last minute, sometime in May. This year, they haven’t really started looking, or at least haven’t been able to fully engage in the process.

We understand that internships are increasingly competitive, and we don’t see it as a failure if they don’t secure one this summer. We’d be perfectly happy if they stayed home, spent time with friends, traveled a bit, and maybe volunteered with organizations they care about. We can always help them put together a meaningful summer.

At the same time, we wonder if we should be encouraging them more actively to pursue something related to their interests—something that could help build toward a future career—or if it’s better to step back and let them find their own pace.

They’ve said, half-jokingly, “I could rule the world without ADHD.” And honestly, we see what they mean—the potential is clearly there. But the reality is that they’re taking things day by day, without much long-term planning right now.

As parents, we’re trying to figure out where the balance is—between supporting, nudging, and simply accepting where they are. What would you do?

What’s with the they? You don’t want to say if it’s a male or female so we can’t figure out who it is?

Or maybe that’s their preferred pronouns. Either way, why do you care??

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure where to post this, but here it is. Feel free to delete it or move it as you see fit.

We have a great kid—curious, kind, and genuinely loves learning. They’ve always been strong academically, especially in math and public policy, and they care deeply about the environment. They also value their friendships and enjoy being around people.

At the same time, they’ve been navigating ADHD and some depression in college. The depression is under control now, which we’re very grateful for, but ADHD continues to make certain things—especially getting started on tasks and following through—much harder than it might appear from the outside.

The biggest challenge isn’t ability—it’s initiation. Once they get going, they do very well. With accommodations and support, their grades have been solid. In fact, they routinely score 100/100 on college math exams, which still amazes us. They’re also the captain of their mock trial team at a top academic college, and on weekends they create and sell street art, donating most of what they earn to charity. There’s a lot to be proud of.

But when it comes to planning ahead—especially things like internships—it’s a different story. Last year, they found a part-time summer job at a law firm at the last minute, sometime in May. This year, they haven’t really started looking, or at least haven’t been able to fully engage in the process.

We understand that internships are increasingly competitive, and we don’t see it as a failure if they don’t secure one this summer. We’d be perfectly happy if they stayed home, spent time with friends, traveled a bit, and maybe volunteered with organizations they care about. We can always help them put together a meaningful summer.

At the same time, we wonder if we should be encouraging them more actively to pursue something related to their interests—something that could help build toward a future career—or if it’s better to step back and let them find their own pace.

They’ve said, half-jokingly, “I could rule the world without ADHD.” And honestly, we see what they mean—the potential is clearly there. But the reality is that they’re taking things day by day, without much long-term planning right now.

As parents, we’re trying to figure out where the balance is—between supporting, nudging, and simply accepting where they are. What would you do?

What’s with the they? You don’t want to say if it’s a male or female so we can’t figure out who it is?

Or maybe that’s their preferred pronouns. Either way, why do you care??

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure where to post this, but here it is. Feel free to delete it or move it as you see fit.

We have a great kid—curious, kind, and genuinely loves learning. They’ve always been strong academically, especially in math and public policy, and they care deeply about the environment. They also value their friendships and enjoy being around people.

At the same time, they’ve been navigating ADHD and some depression in college. The depression is under control now, which we’re very grateful for, but ADHD continues to make certain things—especially getting started on tasks and following through—much harder than it might appear from the outside.

The biggest challenge isn’t ability—it’s initiation. Once they get going, they do very well. With accommodations and support, their grades have been solid. In fact, they routinely score 100/100 on college math exams, which still amazes us. They’re also the captain of their mock trial team at a top academic college, and on weekends they create and sell street art, donating most of what they earn to charity. There’s a lot to be proud of.

But when it comes to planning ahead—especially things like internships—it’s a different story. Last year, they found a part-time summer job at a law firm at the last minute, sometime in May. This year, they haven’t really started looking, or at least haven’t been able to fully engage in the process.

We understand that internships are increasingly competitive, and we don’t see it as a failure if they don’t secure one this summer. We’d be perfectly happy if they stayed home, spent time with friends, traveled a bit, and maybe volunteered with organizations they care about. We can always help them put together a meaningful summer.

At the same time, we wonder if we should be encouraging them more actively to pursue something related to their interests—something that could help build toward a future career—or if it’s better to step back and let them find their own pace.

They’ve said, half-jokingly, “I could rule the world without ADHD.” And honestly, we see what they mean—the potential is clearly there. But the reality is that they’re taking things day by day, without much long-term planning right now.

As parents, we’re trying to figure out where the balance is—between supporting, nudging, and simply accepting where they are. What would you do?

What’s with the they? You don’t want to say if it’s a male or female so we can’t figure out who it is?

Anonymous wrote:Not sure where to post this, but here it is. Feel free to delete it or move it as you see fit.

We have a great kid—curious, kind, and genuinely loves learning. They’ve always been strong academically, especially in math and public policy, and they care deeply about the environment. They also value their friendships and enjoy being around people.

At the same time, they’ve been navigating ADHD and some depression in college. The depression is under control now, which we’re very grateful for, but ADHD continues to make certain things—especially getting started on tasks and following through—much harder than it might appear from the outside.

The biggest challenge isn’t ability—it’s initiation. Once they get going, they do very well. With accommodations and support, their grades have been solid. In fact, they routinely score 100/100 on college math exams, which still amazes us. They’re also the captain of their mock trial team at a top academic college, and on weekends they create and sell street art, donating most of what they earn to charity. There’s a lot to be proud of.

But when it comes to planning ahead—especially things like internships—it’s a different story. Last year, they found a part-time summer job at a law firm at the last minute, sometime in May. This year, they haven’t really started looking, or at least haven’t been able to fully engage in the process.

We understand that internships are increasingly competitive, and we don’t see it as a failure if they don’t secure one this summer. We’d be perfectly happy if they stayed home, spent time with friends, traveled a bit, and maybe volunteered with organizations they care about. We can always help them put together a meaningful summer.

At the same time, we wonder if we should be encouraging them more actively to pursue something related to their interests—something that could help build toward a future career—or if it’s better to step back and let them find their own pace.

They’ve said, half-jokingly, “I could rule the world without ADHD.” And honestly, we see what they mean—the potential is clearly there. But the reality is that they’re taking things day by day, without much long-term planning right now.

As parents, we’re trying to figure out where the balance is—between supporting, nudging, and simply accepting where they are. What would you do?

Anonymous wrote:My college kid is like this. I drop a seed here and there that I hope will sprout, but maybe it won’t. I work really hard at biting my tongue and letting them be who they are. I try not to compare the path other people’s kids are on to my own. I am the captain of their cheer team. Connection has proved to be more important than course correction. But I’m not saying any of it is easy.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Also, there are coaches who work with kids on job searches if you have the $. This could be good executive function training for your kid.

Genuine question: what is the difference between hiring a coach to work with your child vs. you as the parent try to help guide and support them? I have excellent executive function and if my child does not, what would be wrong with my working to advise and guide my child just as a coach would?