Anonymous wrote:At 40, they don't need to meet you unless the two of you are getting married.

I felt this way in my 20s. My parents met my ex husband. There is never a reason for parents to meet a boyfriend no matter what age you are.

When it's something I want to share with him, like a public event the whole family is meeting at.

Do you sign this as a sign of approval? It's practical to just have him go and enjoy conversations with the people he wants to talk to. Maybe you wouldn't fit in, and that's ok too.

Anonymous wrote:FWIW, I had been dating a guy for 3 weeks, was making him dinner at my apartment for the first time, when I invited him to a family wedding out of state. He came with me. We've now been married for 28 years

So you're like mid 70s now?

I don’t think you need to meet family unless you are getting married. I guess if you are dating for a year or longer, you can expect to have met someone from the family.

My in laws are divorced. None of us are really interested in meeting MIL’s boyfriend of 2 years. They live in a different state. We don’t want to include him in family events.

My BIL used to have girlfriends who wanted to join in our family events. Family events meaning hanging out with our family (2 adults 3 kids). We barely want BIL there and didn’t want his girlfriend of 2 months joining us for holidays. I know it bothered some of his ex gfs.

I think that was her point, but in what is supposed to be a LTR 4-6 months for family that is local assuming they are not estranged and have a regular relationship.

Anonymous wrote:In your mid forties and dating, when would you want a guy to invite you to family events in a relationship? How long until a relationship would you feel excluded if he didn't invite you?

Feel excluded from what?

It sounds like you're angling for marriage and full-on family acceptance, and he may just not want that. But that's your real problem, not the lack of invites to what are probably pretty boring occasions.

It really depends on whether you have kids and whether you're just dating or in a relationship.

If there are young kids who could get attached unnecessarily, don't do it at all. If they're older then wait till you're together indefinitely, as in you're ready to move in together in the next 6 months or you're getting engaged.