Anonymous wrote:How can I help her come to terms with the fact that there may be no “dream” school for her? Also she does not want to take a gap year or go to NOVA and then transfer.

She has good options. As everyone said, she doesn’t have to have the perfect school, she just has to pick a school before the deadline and needs to figure out what’s important to being able to make that decision. If she wants to major in business or marketing are there schools where she has a decent chance to transfer into the business program versus another that would be near impossible if not admitted initially? If she is looking at a business/marketing adjacent major, what are the options and what’s available in terms of career guidance, internships etc. if you aren’t in the business school but in an adjacent major. Are there any things like study abroad, Greek life, activities she is interested in pursuing that would give one college the edge after looking at majors?

I don’t know that you can make her feel better about her options if she is determined not to. But I will say, I’ve seen this light a fire in people so that when they get to the school that may have not been their top choice, they work at the level to lessen the chances of that happening again for grad school, internships etc. You also have to consider - it’s all relative. There are lots of kids where MSU or Indiana is there goal and they came out with a good degree and job.

Temple is another one that does rolling admissions. What specifically is she unhappy about? The locations? Fit? Programs?

If she’s not excited, decide based on cost and closer distance. MSU is a little harder to travel to. I’d consider Charleston or Indiana based on climate alone if she need criteria and wants to be further away.

Anonymous wrote:DD has applied broadly to 10+ schools and is more of an average student (3.5w in NoVa, test optional), and has gotten some great acceptances (in my book) but is not really in love with any of them.

She would ideally be a business or marketing major but did not apply to the business school at most college because it was more competitive.

Her current choices are: JMU, Michigan state, Indiana, college of Charleston, and is requesting review to main campus at Penn state. (Accepted to 2+2).

She is not really interested in some of the smaller schools we looked at.

How can I help her come to terms with the fact that there may be no “dream” school for her? Also she does not want to take a gap year or go to NOVA and then transfer.

Perhaps, she is anxious about the realization that she will be leaving home?

Another Indiana fan here - highly recommend

This can happen to any kid at any level. My DD was in tears when she didn't get into her dream ivy or any of her top 4 reaches - it has nothing to do with how hard they worked. Disappointment is universal.

HOWEVER - after getting excited about the school, and then less excited over the summer when registration wasn't perfect, and then excited at move in, my daughter has had 2 fabulous years and has said she can't imagine herself anywhere else.

Some of her friends who did get into their dream schools had tough first semesters. I think those can be the cases where the kids expect everything is roses and perfect and then hit a wall when they realize that reality and dreams are never the same.

Get excited with her. Let her be bummed but think about the positives at her choices. And she had choices, which is so important!

Congrats to your daughter. She will be FINE!!

Have her to try applying to CU Boulder. They do last min admits for undeclared majors. The campus is beautiful, lots of social activities, no Friday classes for most students, active outdoor lifestyle and overall great student body. CU Boulder is an easy admit for B+ student.

Maybe she’s just not excited about college in general, but it reads as not being excited about her options. I say that as a parent whose kid got accepted to their first choice school but seems kind of ho hum about it. Change is hard and college is a big change. I agree with a couple previous posters - she doesn’t need to be excited, she just needs to make a choice; college is what you make of it; it’s overwhelming; and she has some good options.

Indiana is an excellent school for business, which she’ll have a chance to better evaluate once she gets there. Bloomington is also a cool college town, and the midwest is awesome!

She should be more excited because what she’s accomplished is something to be proud of and appreciate.

Michigan State is also an amazing school, but I look better in red than green.

It is a fun time to be at Indiana and it is a great college town.

College of Charleston is also nice and kids there are happy. Close to the beach, pretty campus, nice city, good food, etc...

If she can handle winter- Mich State is also great.

what does she think she is missing out on?

I think she has great choices!

I went to MSU and absolutely loved my time there. It's a huge school with so much to offer that she's sure to find her place. There is tons of school spirit which helps you feel like a part of a community even on a campus of 45,000+ undergrads and even if you're not involved in sports. I've also known many people who went to IU Bloomington and loved it.

She has good options all around and she'll be on a great path no matter what she chooses, even if right now she's not very excited.

Anonymous wrote:Indiana University in Bloomington? Did you visit there yet? My nephew and my friend's kid are both there and they absolutely love it. Beautiful campus, a vibrant college life and so many opportunities for people who have different interests - sports, arts, etc. If you have not visited, plan a visit soon - I think you'll be surprised.

+1

Anonymous wrote:Op here. We are visiting the schools. We are on a visit to one of these schools now and this is when she finally confessed how she feels, in tears.

For those who are telling us she should have worked harder, thanks for that unhelpful advice. She had a rough freshman year grades-wise and it’s been hard to recover. She knows it too.

She is just overwhelmed.

Indiana University in Bloomington? Did you visit there yet? My nephew and my friend's kid are both there and they absolutely love it. Beautiful campus, a vibrant college life and so many opportunities for people who have different interests - sports, arts, etc. If you have not visited, plan a visit soon - I think you'll be surprised.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Those are fantastic options! Take her to the admitted student days. Hopefully, she will change her mind.

Also, encourage her to follow the school's Instagram accounts.

And find the college’s class of 2030 bios for admitted students. She can at least start getting a feel for her potential classmates.