Years ago. Decades really and before I married my wife, my mother set up her will to strictly set up deciding to only go to her grandchildren whom she said I think I would have, saying I'd understand later.

This happened to my grandfather! He was one of 10 siblings but the only one who had a relationship with a single, childless uncle. Uncle was a total jerk to everyone, a hoarder, and didn’t leave his tiny, run down apartment for the last decade of his life. My grandpa would bring him groceries and check on him, but they weren’t particularly close. Everyone assumed the old guy was broke. Nope! My grandpa inherited somewhere around a million bucks! Sadly the money hasn’t made it down to my generation, it was mostly spent on some of his siblings and his 4 kids. But it for sure changed my mom’s life by paying for her education, she got to grow up in a much nicer house etc.

Yes, we had a shocker. My MIL gave my husband and I stock certificates in a Manila envelope shortly after we were married. The Dow at the time was around 8,000.

The total value of the stocks was $700,000. Completely shocked.

We’ve managed to build significant wealth (greater than $10 million). Military officer/SAHM. Made mistakes along the way, but overall grateful to be stewards of the money. Now setting up new trusts (retired and moved to a different state) and will pass along to our children and university.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family has completely disinherited me since I’m transgender. to them money has always been love so it’s not a surprise. I don’t mind, I’m living my best life.

Yikes. Sorry about that. The silver lining is that you're not on the hook for eldercare!

Yep. This is a blessing PP!

Anonymous wrote:My family has completely disinherited me since I’m transgender. to them money has always been love so it’s not a surprise. I don’t mind, I’m living my best life.

Yikes. Sorry about that. The silver lining is that you're not on the hook for eldercare!

My family has completely disinherited me since I’m transgender. to them money has always been love so it’s not a surprise. I don’t mind, I’m living my best life.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When grandpa died, the will was a shock. He didn't have a ton, but he split it 96/2/2 among his 3 children. MIL thought she was going to get 1/3 of $150k and ended up getting $3k.

He was a deeply flawed human being and no one ever really figured out why he did it. The daughter who inherited it all lived across the country and didn't even come to the funeral. Just weird all around.

The usual rule is that spouse cannot be disinherited and is entitled to something like 1/3 of the estate. Where did this happen?

Yeah, no spouse at the time of death. He had two adult kids from 1st marriage (2%ers), 1 adult daughter from second marriage (96%er), and had married/divorced a third woman before ultimately living his last 15 years with a lady he never married.

And no, it was never equalized. I suspect grandpa was trying to alleviate his own guilt about not being present in that daughter’s daily life, but it was a crummy way to do it. There was a lot of hurt from the two who had to handle all the affairs (they were local) while the third got it all without any explanation.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When grandpa died, the will was a shock. He didn't have a ton, but he split it 96/2/2 among his 3 children. MIL thought she was going to get 1/3 of $150k and ended up getting $3k.

He was a deeply flawed human being and no one ever really figured out why he did it. The daughter who inherited it all lived across the country and didn't even come to the funeral. Just weird all around.

The usual rule is that spouse cannot be disinherited and is entitled to something like 1/3 of the estate. Where did this happen?

I don't see a spouse mentioned- this was inheritance from grandfather to next generation down. There is no grandmother mentioned. The MIL mentioned appears to be one of the next generation down.

Anonymous wrote:When grandpa died, the will was a shock. He didn't have a ton, but he split it 96/2/2 among his 3 children. MIL thought she was going to get 1/3 of $150k and ended up getting $3k.

He was a deeply flawed human being and no one ever really figured out why he did it. The daughter who inherited it all lived across the country and didn't even come to the funeral. Just weird all around.

The usual rule is that spouse cannot be disinherited and is entitled to something like 1/3 of the estate. Where did this happen?

Anonymous wrote:My divorce lawyer, when I asked for a recommendation for an estate lawyer for a will, said since I didn’t own any property I didn’t need a will yet. Is that true? My assets are in liquid investments and pension at the moment. I am 43.

With brokerage accounts and IRAs/401ks you can designate beneficiaries in the accounts - so there's no need to have a will. Depending on where you live there's also a threshold for other assets below which probate is not needed. In the case of my MIL, the value of any items beyond her bank accounts was maybe $8,000 - a 20 yr old car and some furniture. She did not own any real estate. The value of her brokerage/IRA accounts was about $400,000 but those all had designated beneficiaries set to TOD (transfer on death). End result was no probate needed.

When I think you need a will beyond owning real estate:
1. you have children and want to designate a guardian in case you pass away while they are minors
2. you have funds TOD to a person who you want to further subdivide them - for example, if you have kids you might TOD to a sibling and ask them to put funds in trust for your children in the future. Or you have 2 children and one is still a minor. In this case it's best to set up TOD to the person who would be the executor of your estate. You need a will to designate your executor.
These are items that could still go in a simple one page will you can write with a kit or online website and get notarized...no need to have a lawyer draw it up for you if it's that simple.

Not a lawyer, but if you have money in the bank, then you need a will.

My divorce lawyer, when I asked for a recommendation for an estate lawyer for a will, said since I didn’t own any property I didn’t need a will yet. Is that true? My assets are in liquid investments and pension at the moment. I am 43.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One here one day someone posted about unclaimed property. I searched my maiden name in the state whre I grew up and there was something from my Godfather (uncle) who died when I was 10. He never married but had a life insurance policy through his job and had made me beneficiary. He died in a work place accident but no idea about the policy. Fast forward to when I found it between the policy, some settlements and fines to the company the grand total was over $1 mil. Just sitting there for decades.

Amazing! And that it started with a post on DCUM!

Wow! And you were actually able to get it? That is amazing. So cool and nice of him to include you.

I waste a lot of time on this site, but it has benefited me financially also. I was completely overwhelmed with work/parenting/life when interest rates were so low a few years ago. Never ever would have refinanced if I hadn't seen people talking here. I was barely surviving. Was able to refinance for a very low rate and 15 yr mortgage so knocked off years of mortgage payments.

It took a lot to get it because he died in 1982, the cases regarding the accident (there were a few similar accidents at the company) pertained to him but didn't mention him, lots of legal firms, company has since gone under, etc. But once it was in the system it just sat there and finally digitized. I had to get a lawyer and jump through hoops but all worked out in the end.

Anonymous wrote:One here one day someone posted about unclaimed property. I searched my maiden name in the state whre I grew up and there was something from my Godfather (uncle) who died when I was 10. He never married but had a life insurance policy through his job and had made me beneficiary. He died in a work place accident but no idea about the policy. Fast forward to when I found it between the policy, some settlements and fines to the company the grand total was over $1 mil. Just sitting there for decades.

Wow, congratulations! And praise to whoever started that thread

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:One here one day someone posted about unclaimed property. I searched my maiden name in the state whre I grew up and there was something from my Godfather (uncle) who died when I was 10. He never married but had a life insurance policy through his job and had made me beneficiary. He died in a work place accident but no idea about the policy. Fast forward to when I found it between the policy, some settlements and fines to the company the grand total was over $1 mil. Just sitting there for decades.

Amazing! And that it started with a post on DCUM!

Wow! And you were actually able to get it? That is amazing. So cool and nice of him to include you.

I waste a lot of time on this site, but it has benefited me financially also. I was completely overwhelmed with work/parenting/life when interest rates were so low a few years ago. Never ever would have refinanced if I hadn't seen people talking here. I was barely surviving. Was able to refinance for a very low rate and 15 yr mortgage so knocked off years of mortgage payments.