My inlaws said they save $500 a month on food when DH went off to college. They had added it up. And this was over a decade ago.

I have two boys and a girl. My daughter is the youngest. My boys’ sports and extracurricular activities cost much more than my daughter’s. I spend more on my daughter’s clothes because they are pretty. I’m sure one day she may want makeup and skincare products.

It may seem like I, the wife, spend much more than my husband. He will buy a 200k car or a 100k watch. They cost more than my bags or shoes.

I have a 14 yr old girl and a 16 yr old boy. Both are the "traditional" gender types. I spend more on my daughter by far.

That being said, my son requires tutoring and Pvt school which both my kids go because of his learning disabilities. He's also in the past needed therapy but he plays sports at school v my daughter who plays a club sport which costs a lot more. So from that perspective it's a wash.

It adds up no matter what as there's so many variables to their activities, health, educational considerations, personalities. It's just crazy $$$ full stop but yes, as a girl there's considerations for clothing though suits for boys are not cheap lol - jewelry, makeup and hair so beauty overall. Quite honestly that's it. Everything else is more or less equal opportunity expensive I don't think it's +$50k more in other words for my daughter!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Weddings, clothes, haircuts, parties, etc. girls are expensive.

Most couples pay for their own weddings, or parents from both sides contribute. My parents and ILs both gave the same amount (a few thousand) to help pay for our wedding.

Boys wear clothes, get haircuts, have and go to parties. People can spend more or less on those things but it's a choice.

I know girls who are very low maintenance, do inexpensive sports or activities, are not into clothes or makeup (or work part-time and spend their own money on those things), etc.

I also know boys who always need the most expensive sneakers and clothes, participate in extremely expensive sports, eat insane amounts of food, etc.

And vice versa.

You cannot generalize by gender. Also my guess is that if you strongly believe that girls cost more than boys, you will spend more on your girls than your boys because you have bought into the belief that this is how it is. But that's your own fault.

I agree with the bolded.

There are a lot of ways to control the clothes spending that to me seems like the main difference.

I knew a little girl who often went to daycare in gorgeous dresses which was so cute but a bit weird. (Keep in mind that a lot of girls' party dresses these days are polyester satin and polyester velvet so can be washed in the washing machine.)

I asked her mother one time about it and the mom said that she was buying them for cheap at children's resale stores. And that her daughter just loved dressing like that.

Close to the end of high school, my kids crossed paths with this girl again. She's on robotics club with my son and dresses in a very typical, not expensive high school girl way. She's outgrown her princess phase. But it was adorable while it lasted.

As the mother of the groom, I paid for half of the wedding. Just saying.

I don't pay for expensive haircuts for me, I certainly wasn't paying for them for a child. ECs: Our boy cost more through MS (expensive sports that he later played at his HS), our girl cost more as she got older (dance). Clothes were similar, both lived in hoodies/sweats (him) and hoodies/leggings (her) through HS. One chose a more a college that was more expensive, but that I feel was random. We have the same amount of $$ set aside for each of their weddings (their choice, use it for a wedding or a down-payment of a house).

I would imagine special needs or other diagnosis requiring therapies (autism or medical condition or therapist) would make more of a difference than gender

I used to wonder where the huge costs of childraising are in media quoted figures.

When I studied how the figures were put together, a big assumption is that you buy a bigger house to raise kids. That's not true for my family. We never ended up moving. So the incremental real estate cost of my kids is $0. In a lot of estimates, that's $10s of thousands per child.

I feel that my greatest cash expenses were gender neutral (lost maternal wages & career momentum, daycare, college, travel/vacations).

I would bet that teenage boy food and girls' excess clothing budget would offset each other.

I (a female) paid for most of my wedding and reception. Groom was a grad student and his parents paid just for the rehearsal dinner. My parents bought my dress and paid for the church flowers and some decor. It was maybe a $20K wedding for 100 in today's terms.

I have no idea what to expect from my sons regarding future wedding chipping in.

I really think childcare costs and concerns are the hardest to plan for and cope with. Those are definitely gender-neutral.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Weddings, clothes, haircuts, parties, etc. girls are expensive.

Most couples pay for their own weddings, or parents from both sides contribute. My parents and ILs both gave the same amount (a few thousand) to help pay for our wedding.

Boys wear clothes, get haircuts, have and go to parties. People can spend more or less on those things but it's a choice.

I know girls who are very low maintenance, do inexpensive sports or activities, are not into clothes or makeup (or work part-time and spend their own money on those things), etc.

I also know boys who always need the most expensive sneakers and clothes, participate in extremely expensive sports, eat insane amounts of food, etc.

And vice versa.

You cannot generalize by gender. Also my guess is that if you strongly believe that girls cost more than boys, you will spend more on your girls than your boys because you have bought into the belief that this is how it is. But that's your own fault.

Well said. I’m the parent of a girl and 2 boys. We will contribute the same for weddings. All the kids had parties. All had haircuts (we thought it was ridiculous to pay for DD to have highlights so that was on her if she wanted). All needed cars to drive. All needed clothing and shoes and we spent fairly equally. If anything we spent more on activities for our youngest son because he played a travel sport.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Weddings, clothes, haircuts, parties, etc. girls are expensive.

Most couples pay for their own weddings, or parents from both sides contribute. My parents and ILs both gave the same amount (a few thousand) to help pay for our wedding.

Boys wear clothes, get haircuts, have and go to parties. People can spend more or less on those things but it's a choice.

I know girls who are very low maintenance, do inexpensive sports or activities, are not into clothes or makeup (or work part-time and spend their own money on those things), etc.

I also know boys who always need the most expensive sneakers and clothes, participate in extremely expensive sports, eat insane amounts of food, etc.

And vice versa.

You cannot generalize by gender. Also my guess is that if you strongly believe that girls cost more than boys, you will spend more on your girls than your boys because you have bought into the belief that this is how it is. But that's your own fault.

I was with you until the bolded. Now I am convinced boys are more expensive

I have definitely met teenage boys who eat several multiples what I eat every single day. If you've ever been in a house with multiple teenage boys, you know how fast food disappears. It's not their fault, puberty just requires a lot of calories for boys, but calories aren't free.

+1 my teen boy can rack up the grocery bills

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The most expensive children are often those with severe special needs, and boys are more likely to have severe special needs.

This. We’ve spent thousands on various therapies and DS isn’t out of elementary yet. 😔

It's even more if you have to provide for the child's care for life.

+2. Agree.

Anonymous wrote:All kids are expensive. And the more you make the more you spend. Private pre-school, fancy strollers, private tutors, cars, vacations, fancy summer camps, sports camps, extras at college and weddings.

Having kids is now a luxury.

Yup

All kids are expensive. And the more you make the more you spend. Private pre-school, fancy strollers, private tutors, cars, vacations, fancy summer camps, sports camps, extras at college and weddings.

Having kids is now a luxury.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The most expensive children are often those with severe special needs, and boys are more likely to have severe special needs.

This. We’ve spent thousands on various therapies and DS isn’t out of elementary yet. 😔

It's even more if you have to provide for the child's care for life.

Anonymous wrote:The most expensive children are often those with severe special needs, and boys are more likely to have severe special needs.

This. We’ve spent thousands on various therapies and DS isn’t out of elementary yet. 😔

Anonymous wrote:Weddings, clothes, haircuts, parties, etc. girls are expensive.

Boys wear cloths, have parties, get haircuts.

This is such a weird take.