Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never name it. None of their business.

I do know of a few cases (other people, not me) where previous employer did know an exec at someone's new employer and tried to poison reputation of the new employee at the new employer.

+1.

There were two times in my life where I left because I hated the job and despised my manager. I was being polite by keeping it to myself.

Should I have said: "Actually, I'm taking a 10K pay cut just to get away from Risa, who happens to be a lazy manager that strolls in every day at 10, reads the news and her socials until lunch, goes to lunch, comes back at 2, 'works' til 4 and then, leaves yet somehow manages to crap all over everybody about their low production"?

Nobody's suggesting you say why. Only where.

Anonymous wrote:My last employer required it. That’s because they wanted to sue anyone who went to a competitor or someone in the same space. Apparently when that company acquired my original employer, the new employment agreement they made us sign included that requirement. Fortunately I was not going to a company in the same space, but I heard they had gone after a low-level marketing person who did, and her new employer as well. Needless to say, they were a-holes.

"Required it"

LMFAO. They arent the police and cant compel you to do diddily. I'd have told them to eff off.

My last employer required it. That’s because they wanted to sue anyone who went to a competitor or someone in the same space. Apparently when that company acquired my original employer, the new employment agreement they made us sign included that requirement. Fortunately I was not going to a company in the same space, but I heard they had gone after a low-level marketing person who did, and her new employer as well. Needless to say, they were a-holes.

Anonymous wrote:I never name it. None of their business.

I do know of a few cases (other people, not me) where previous employer did know an exec at someone's new employer and tried to poison reputation of the new employee at the new employer.

+1.

There were two times in my life where I left because I hated the job and despised my manager. I was being polite by keeping it to myself.

Should I have said: "Actually, I'm taking a 10K pay cut just to get away from Risa, who happens to be a lazy manager that strolls in every day at 10, reads the news and her socials until lunch, goes to lunch, comes back at 2, 'works' til 4 and then, leaves yet somehow manages to crap all over everybody about their low production"?

Anonymous wrote:I never name it. None of their business.

I do know of a few cases (other people, not me) where previous employer did know an exec at someone's new employer and tried to poison reputation of the new employee at the new employer.

Because of this
I worked at a super toxic place and no one said for that reason

It can be awkward not to share where you are going, but sometimes it's for the best. However, when not sharing where you are headed, it's a good idea to provide bosses/coworkers with goodbye gifts. Nothing too elaborate: selection of homemade jams and preserves (maybe in a small hamper if you're feeling generous), gourmet cheese wheels, etc.

If I had a reasonable relationship with the employer, if they ask, I share. NBD.

Anonymous wrote:Oh, you fortunate people who have never had or witnessed an awkward leave. Any of these could be true: there is no “job” or next step; they simply needed a break from a bad boss, a tough health issue, etc. Or they were pushed out or threatened to be pushed out and are making it look voluntary. Or don’t want to name the next place because sometimes things happen between your bit of time off between jobs and job start (some people are even laid off weeks in to the new job.)

A normal person makes up something to say in response to the obvious question everone will ask. It doesn't have to be true. "I'm going to spend a few weeks thinking about what I want to do next" or "My mom needs some help for a bit" or "I'm superstitious and I want to wait until I start my new job to say anything."

Literally anything except "Nunya." Being weird about leaving means the last thing they'll remember about you is how weird you were.

Normally I share where I'm going if someone asks. A few years ago an attorney left the firm where I worked to partner with another attorney who had left the firm a few years prior. Once they'd gotten settled they hired me. I did not share where I was going because it would have caused unnecessary drama. I wanted a peaceful two weeks.

I have always shared, except for one time when I was burning a bridge on my way out (tried to get my boss fired on my way out the door - he ended up with a demotion) and didn't want to leave a trail. But that was a special circumstance. (Boss was harassing and verbally abusive - I wouldn't recommend that in any other circumstance).

Otherwise, I always share and leave on good terms (wrap things up nicely, leave good documentation, etc).

Do we work in the same office? A coworker left last week and had flat out refused to tell anyone where he was going. Anytime he was asked in a team call or even directly he acted as if he didn't hear the question. We all thought it was weird. Professional services consulting firm with normal corporate turnover. Will say it's the last thing we remember of him, which isn't a good way to leave a job methinks, because if anyone were to ask me about him in the future I'd have to say he was a bit weird.

A lot of people overlap jobs so don’t want to say.

My last job only did new hire orientation in the 1st of month and 15th of Month. My new boss pushed me to start on 1st. The company does not start benefits till 1st of following month which would leave me no insurance for a month. Plus it was Thursday Sept 1st with Monday Sept 5 Labor Day. So I resigned Friday Sept 2nd with last Friday Sept 16.

This happens a lot. HR knows it. And reason a lot of people don’t say where going as already there.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never understood the silence about it, either.

This.

I remember when a colleague resigned for another job and was asked by many people throughout their last two weeks where they were going, they responded in such a weird way by saying, “I’m keeping that information close to my heart.”

I guess it worked insofar as baffling people to the point there weren’t any follow up questions.

Anyway, it’s not like someone could sabotage your next job. And it’s not like everyone won’t find out. Once you update your LinkedIn or the office gossip finds out (because she will stalk you), everyone will know.

The savvy people I know have always shared their job offer. Some have used it as leverage for big promotions to stay.

^Terrible advice. You never accept a counter offer.

I know a handful of people who used an external job offer as leverage for big promotions. All of them are still happily employed (at a higher level) years later.

No clue what your experience is, or what kind of work you are in, but this seems fairly common in my sector.

Having said that, employers only ask if there’s anything they can do to make them stay when it’s a truly invaluable person…and as long as they don’t have a morale issue and haven’t checked out. I’m C-suite level with a big portfolio, and I’ve happily congratulated people on their new job without trying to persuade them to stay, but that’s for a select group of people who I know are burnt out and easily replaced.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never understood the silence about it, either.

This.

I remember when a colleague resigned for another job and was asked by many people throughout their last two weeks where they were going, they responded in such a weird way by saying, “I’m keeping that information close to my heart.”

I guess it worked insofar as baffling people to the point there weren’t any follow up questions.

Anyway, it’s not like someone could sabotage your next job. And it’s not like everyone won’t find out. Once you update your LinkedIn or the office gossip finds out (because she will stalk you), everyone will know.

The savvy people I know have always shared their job offer. Some have used it as leverage for big promotions to stay.

^Terrible advice. You never accept a counter offer.

No always true. Some jobs like my old job had very big ESOP and RSUs but we paid a lot less and most people quit was soley higher pay or their four year original sign on stock bonus was about to fully vest so comp would fall in year five. They often walk away 200k to 500k in unvested stock or options if still in first four years. The few good people were offered and would take counteroffers. Most were not offered. Anyone with a lot of unvested LTI, Stock or Options is pretty easy to convince them to stay. Extremely low risk to them. And good people at year four could get a new top up in a counter offer.

My old place we vested monthly on orginial four four year sign on after 12 months of service and then annually on year end bonuses. You just had to be there once you got them for them to vest. It is low risk to stay as lets say they tell you please stay we will give you 80K extra RSUs today that vest over 4 years well that starts vesting plus all prior stuff is vesting even if they in 6-18 months force you out by then you vested a ton.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve never understood the silence about it, either.

This.

I remember when a colleague resigned for another job and was asked by many people throughout their last two weeks where they were going, they responded in such a weird way by saying, “I’m keeping that information close to my heart.”

I guess it worked insofar as baffling people to the point there weren’t any follow up questions.

Anyway, it’s not like someone could sabotage your next job. And it’s not like everyone won’t find out. Once you update your LinkedIn or the office gossip finds out (because she will stalk you), everyone will know.

The savvy people I know have always shared their job offer. Some have used it as leverage for big promotions to stay.

^Terrible advice. You never accept a counter offer.