Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t open it or respond, they aren’t interested. It’s an invitation not a summons.

OP here. I am not talking about people who don’t respond. I am talking about people who RSVP yes and then I pay for their kid and they don’t show up.

I’m totally fine with people not responding or RSVPing no. I’m even ok with people texting me at the very last minute to say they can’t come. I had a person say they were sick and I let a sibling join. I’m annoyed at the person who just didn’t show up and I am out $50. It is the principle more than the actual cost but the cost is annoying also.

Don’t invite them next time. And where are you paying $50/kid? Or are you including the cost of fruit punch, pizza,
and cake? Because you can take all that as leftovers. Individually wrap any cake slices and freeze them.

You also may across as way too intense. Maybe the other parents pick up on that and realize they’re not into it? They shouldn’t RSVP yes and not show, but you seem very, very angry.

🤷🏼‍♀️

You havent hosted a fun bday party have you. I treated my kid to a climbing party and it was $60 a kid with no food. I also had a race car party that was $50/kid for them to have 3 or 4 races.

I might’ve said “oh, we weren’t sure you were coming. But glad you could could make it.” Was it at your home or a venue? The venue might not even let some people in if strict headcount

PSA: let’s bring back the rsvp, everyone! Let people know if you’re coming

We held bday party yesterday and 10 rsvped yes and 14 showed up

For what it’s worth, I agree that people who cancel last minute (for anything other than sickness/family emergency) are pretty rude, particularly for a party at a venue. Another child could’ve had that place or parents could have saved money.

Anonymous wrote:Good grief. I have many gmail accounts and glance at spam daily in case something I care about is there. Then I delete spam. Do people just leave hundreds there for 30mdays?
Looking at the headings in a mailbox does not get you malware.

I have 2,429 unread emails right now not including the spam folder. I'm not sure, but that might be just primary.

Three things that help a lot:

1) use software that tracks who has opened the invite. Text everyone who hasn't opened it. Spam filters and things get lost. You can also send automated reminders.

2) Include an ICS invite! I'm surprised by how few people do this. It's so helpful. Make a calendar invite and include the relevant details.

3) plan a party that's flexible. If you have a bigger space than you need, and if the headcount doesn't directly change the cost, it's way less stressful. So like, a rented room and trays of food. Of course you still need to estimate but you're not going to sweat the specific numbers. I know this isn't always possible with venues etc.

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t open it or respond, they aren’t interested. It’s an invitation not a summons.

This

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t open it or respond, they aren’t interested. It’s an invitation not a summons.

OP here. I am not talking about people who don’t respond. I am talking about people who RSVP yes and then I pay for their kid and they don’t show up.

I’m totally fine with people not responding or RSVPing no. I’m even ok with people texting me at the very last minute to say they can’t come. I had a person say they were sick and I let a sibling join. I’m annoyed at the person who just didn’t show up and I am out $50. It is the principle more than the actual cost but the cost is annoying also.

Yes, there are some very inconsiderate people out there.

We just RSVPd for a large party happening in 2 weeks (50+ kids invited) and I can see that over half the people invited haven’t even responded yet. I agree with others that this just becomes too stressful and not worth it.

I know a lot of others can deal with it, but I switched to smaller parties with people I know are relatively responsive and not flakey!

People are incredibly rude. The way to bring back manners is to stop including the rude people. I host a lot, and I’m gobsmacked by the late cancellations, etc. When someone does that, they aren’t invited back…

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t open it or respond, they aren’t interested. It’s an invitation not a summons.

I knew the non-responders would show up with their justifications.

They are proud of the fact they don't look at invites and don't care if their kids are involved in the social scene. Very odd people so it must run in the family any way.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know a lot of my invitations get put in my spam and they are missed!! send a direct email to them checking in to make sure they got it or a text

So check your spam. Don’t your kids like to be included?

With Gmail so much is directed into Spam no, not checking it. I set that for a reason.

Cool. So you don't get invited when you're a serial non-responder. Oh well.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t open it or respond, they aren’t interested. It’s an invitation not a summons.

OP here. I am not talking about people who don’t respond. I am talking about people who RSVP yes and then I pay for their kid and they don’t show up.

I’m totally fine with people not responding or RSVPing no. I’m even ok with people texting me at the very last minute to say they can’t come. I had a person say they were sick and I let a sibling join. I’m annoyed at the person who just didn’t show up and I am out $50. It is the principle more than the actual cost but the cost is annoying also.

Don’t invite them next time. And where are you paying $50/kid? Or are you including the cost of fruit punch, pizza,
and cake? Because you can take all that as leftovers. Individually wrap any cake slices and freeze them.

You also may across as way too intense. Maybe the other parents pick up on that and realize they’re not into it? They shouldn’t RSVP yes and not show, but you seem very, very angry.

🤷🏼‍♀️

Anonymous wrote:If they don’t open it or respond, they aren’t interested. It’s an invitation not a summons.

OP here. I am not talking about people who don’t respond. I am talking about people who RSVP yes and then I pay for their kid and they don’t show up.

I’m totally fine with people not responding or RSVPing no. I’m even ok with people texting me at the very last minute to say they can’t come. I had a person say they were sick and I let a sibling join. I’m annoyed at the person who just didn’t show up and I am out $50. It is the principle more than the actual cost but the cost is annoying also.

I understand your frustration. After I felt my child's party was almost derailed by the numerous last minute cancellations and strange choices people made, I realized I had to lower my expectations for other parents. Can't parent the parents. Gave them grace. Imagined they were all having a really bad day. It helped.