Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Playing basketball at the local park or in someone’s driveway is free. Kicking around a soccer ball is free. There are a thousand different ways your son could take his girlfriend on dates that cost less than $50 that would show effort and actual thought.

And they do that. But we expect him to take her on one proper date once a month. And pay for things.

They are watching the Bills game this afternoon (the wings will cost me $25), after they go hit golf balls ($20).

You want them to eat oodles of noodles in my basement after basketball at the park?

Again this might be the root of the loneliness epidemic.

They go on hikes, and run together and watch movies and Stranger things.

Shoot a movie out is $50.

They do free things and things that cost $. Even a movie in my basement is $20 worth of pizza.

If he wants to pay for his girlfriend and their “nice” dates he can get a job. Are you going to fund his love life all through college too? When he has his first job out of college and isn’t making a ton?Does she realize his parents are paying for her to do these things? Not exactly a gentleman if someone else is paying for your dates.

It’s still gentlemanly, and appreciated. The reality is it’s very hard for teens to work. Athletics, school and ECs take a ton of time. Jobs want real commitments 2-3 shifts a week with large time blocks. Hard to do during the school year.

There’s no need to be critical of what others do, considering the circumstances

Anonymous wrote:We do $150 per month but she doesn’t pay for gas or car insurance. Doesn’t have time for a job during the year and wasn’t able to find one last summer that was willing to work around her sport schedule. She did some babysitting and dog walking but couldn’t find enough to have it be sufficient for the school year.

Similar for my senior

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

If he has time to date and do sports he has time to work. You are making excuses gor him. He needs a job.

Well I would also teach my kids if you can’t go out and do healthy stuff 4x a month you’re working too much.

But no he has sports and volunteering, he gets home at 9 most school nights.

Work life balance. No wonder boys can’t foster relationships and all these women complaining the h’s haven’t planned a date… ever

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Playing basketball at the local park or in someone’s driveway is free. Kicking around a soccer ball is free. There are a thousand different ways your son could take his girlfriend on dates that cost less than $50 that would show effort and actual thought.

And they do that. But we expect him to take her on one proper date once a month. And pay for things.

They are watching the Bills game this afternoon (the wings will cost me $25), after they go hit golf balls ($20).

You want them to eat oodles of noodles in my basement after basketball at the park?

Again this might be the root of the loneliness epidemic.

They go on hikes, and run together and watch movies and Stranger things.

Shoot a movie out is $50.

They do free things and things that cost $. Even a movie in my basement is $20 worth of pizza.

If he wants to pay for his girlfriend and their “nice” dates he can get a job. Are you going to fund his love life all through college too? When he has his first job out of college and isn’t making a ton?Does she realize his parents are paying for her to do these things? Not exactly a gentleman if someone else is paying for your dates.

We will have to agree to disagree.

Of course he’s 17, and her parents pay for things when he is there. They payed for them to go to some indoor putt putt last week.

You are literally crashing out over 1 date a month, 1 thing with his friends and 2 golf games. You also assume he hits $500 each month. Plus you assume it’s every month. It’s a budget don’t come in at $499 each month that’s also irresponsible.

He’s not my only child and yes my boys who are working do save their money to do nice dates. Don’t waste money on Starbucks and chipotle every day, pack a lunch.

They have to learn to be gentlemen it doesn’t just happen at 25.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

If he has time to date and do sports he has time to work. You are making excuses gor him. He needs a job.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Your kid can’t go on dates that don’t involve concert tickets or sporting event tickets? We used to just go for a drive and make out.

But, but, he has to take her (and pay with Bank of Dad funds) on “proper” dates that “he” pays for. Hahaha that’s a good one

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Hanging out at your house is free. Or he can get a job and pay for his dates

You’d rather my kid hang in our basement with his girlfriend than take her on a proper date at least once a month. Or catch a capitals game once a month with his friends? No wonder young men are such a mess now a days.

You think he should give up golfing?

You think he should quit coaching kids and being a special Olympics unified partner to “get a job”?

The whole question was for kids who can’t work right now due to school/sports/volunteering. It wasn’t for slackers hanging in moms basement.

I think he should realize that golfing is known as a hobby for rich people with lots of spare time for a reason . If he graduates college and expects to play a round of golf every weekend, and also go to professional sporting events a couple times a month, and also to take his dates to things like concerts and pro sporting events, and also expects to use uber in an unlimited fashion, he’s going to he broke and asking mommy for money into his 30s. THATS the problem for young men these days. Realizing they can’t provide themselves- let alone a girlfriend- the sort of life they expect. That’s what leads to this whole “immigrants are taking all the jobs and services” and “everything is too expensive , when did this happen, no one can live a normal life on these salaries, how come some people just sit around and get welfare and I’m expected to work my butt off and still not be able to spend 200 dollars a week on uber if I still hope to be able to fit in 4 rounds of golf this month and catch a playoff football game with my girlfriend?? I’m angry!! It’s someone’s fault!”

Anonymous wrote:No allowance. He should have saved money from the other two summers he was eligible to work to use during school year.

This. I occasionally borrow money from my teen son. He easily made $5-6k the last few summers.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Hanging out at your house is free. Or he can get a job and pay for his dates

You’d rather my kid hang in our basement with his girlfriend than take her on a proper date at least once a month. Or catch a capitals game once a month with his friends? No wonder young men are such a mess now a days.

You think he should give up golfing?

You think he should quit coaching kids and being a special Olympics unified partner to “get a job”?

The whole question was for kids who can’t work right now due to school/sports/volunteering. It wasn’t for slackers hanging in mom’s basement.

I’m 43 and I make 200k a year and a capitals game is a splurge for my and DH. It’s hundreds of dollars plus transportation or parking, plus food and drinks. That’s not a normal way for a 17 year old to hang out

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Your kid can’t go on dates that don’t involve concert tickets or sporting event tickets? We used to just go for a drive and make out.

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

You have to specify that you don’t pay for alcohol for your 17 year old?

I don’t give any allowance ever. It’s always possible to work a job and make money even if you are busy.

I do buy 17 year olds needed clothes and school and stuff like that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Playing basketball at the local park or in someone’s driveway is free. Kicking around a soccer ball is free. There are a thousand different ways your son could take his girlfriend on dates that cost less than $50 that would show effort and actual thought.

And they do that. But we expect him to take her on one proper date once a month. And pay for things.

They are watching the Bills game this afternoon (the wings will cost me $25), after they go hit golf balls ($20).

You want them to eat oodles of noodles in my basement after basketball at the park?

Again this might be the root of the loneliness epidemic.

They go on hikes, and run together and watch movies and Stranger things.

Shoot a movie out is $50.

They do free things and things that cost $. Even a movie in my basement is $20 worth of pizza.

If he wants to pay for his girlfriend and their “nice” dates he can get a job. Are you going to fund his love life all through college too? When he has his first job out of college and isn’t making a ton?Does she realize his parents are paying for her to do these things? Not exactly a gentleman if someone else is paying for your dates.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I gave my son 500 a month but that included golfing, going to sporting events and concerts.

I don’t pay for Starbucks or alcohol, but I will pay for chipotle or Chick-fil-A twice a week.

Unlimited Ubers.

That’s insane

1 golf game is $100 and tickets to a concert or sport event with his girlfriend and dinner is $200. That’s 1 date a month.

Playing basketball at the local park or in someone’s driveway is free. Kicking around a soccer ball is free. There are a thousand different ways your son could take his girlfriend on dates that cost less than $50 that would show effort and actual thought.

And they do that. But we expect him to take her on one proper date once a month. And pay for things.

They are watching the Bills game this afternoon (the wings will cost me $25), after they go hit golf balls ($20).

You want them to eat oodles of noodles in my basement after basketball at the park?

Again this might be the root of the loneliness epidemic.

They go on hikes, and run together and watch movies and Stranger things.

Shoot a movie out is $50.

They do free things and things that cost $. Even a movie in my basement is $20 worth of pizza.

We have a family credit card. He puts gas and occasional food with friends on it. If it were excessive, we’d talk and have rules. When special things come up, like golfing with friends, he’d ask but we’d say yes. If he had a Starbucks problem or had free time to be out a lot, then this might not work. He’s not taking uber even, unlike the golfing PP. Sports and school take up all his time, so social events are not consistent and not expensive.
I don’t think an allowance makes sense for us. He’s end up banking money, which didn’t serve anyone right now. We want him so busy he can’t work. So we pay for his expenses and are comfortable with his level of spending.