Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need an aid if family can stop by for an hour or so.

The patient has a TBI. The family tries to be present for 9-12 hours/day and someone usually is. But clearly they need a break - the stress is really overwhelming that at the moment - and we are trying to figure out some options.

So it’s not your family? The family needs to just divide up the hours needed. That’s what we did.

NP- it's not that easy to visit a hospital every day even for a few "divided" hours.
It takes so much out of you. You know you need to go over there. You need carved out the time, park, visit, chase down staff, find things out. And so much is neglected at home. It's why they have Ronald McDonald houses and things like that.

It's really really difficult.

When someone is in the hospital, the visitors should be kept to an absolute minimum. No family needs to be there. They get in the way. The hospital staff will call if they need to discuss anything. An aide would only get in the way, and they may not release info to an aide.

Agency rates will likely be in the range of $30-40 an hour fyi. I think it can be totally worth it for the peace of mind. But it’s not affordable for many people.

I’m not sure I understand why they feel somebody has to be present with their loved one in the hospital, though. What are they afraid will happen if they visit only a few hours each day?

PP here. Do not use volunteers. I used to volunteer in a hospital and this is not a volunteer type assignment.

Many good suggestions here.

1. As others said ask the hospital.

2. Call a care agency.

3. You will encounter a problem in having a non family member communicate with doctors or medical professionals sharing information with this person. HIPPS type things.

4. The person will not be able to provide "care" as the person does not have privileges. The person can make sure the patient is comfortable and needs are being met.

5. I totally understand not wanting to leave a person who cannot communicate in the hospital alone. Sounds a bit odd but hear me out.

You need someone attentive and who can listen and send notes/updates. Do you know any responsible college students home at break? Any retired nurses or teachers? Teachers on winter break? Do you belong to a church or synagogue, maybe there?

I know these ideas may sound silly but just trying to help. My mom was a teacher and always hired other young teachers to stay in here house and pet sit over the summer.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need an aid if family can stop by for an hour or so.

The patient has a TBI. The family tries to be present for 9-12 hours/day and someone usually is. But clearly they need a break - the stress is really overwhelming that at the moment - and we are trying to figure out some options.

My mom has dementia and whenever she is hospitalized the hospital has an on-staff sitter in her room with her. But her stays are normally just a few days, I’m not sure if they’d provide one long term. I’ve had to hire caregivers for her in rehab. She’s now on hospice in memory care and I employ overnight care for her for 12 hours a night. It’s not cheap. But it’s necessary.

Is the issue that the patient would be lonely or would it be unsafe for them to be alone for any period of time?

Forgot to add: it’s a mix of lonely and unsafe.

I posted already about looking into whether the hospital provides first and then hire. For lonely, I'd talk to social worker about if there are volunteers to visit. Does the person like therapy dogs? If it's unsafe, that is different. Also, for just lonely, you could pay much less that if you need to hire someone who may need to assist if no nurse is available.

Yes. First find out if the patient qualifies for a hospital appointed aide. I had a family member hire one for an elder without looking into it. Then the elder had 2 people there often overlapping and chatting with eachother. In that case it was dementia, not sure if TBI qualifies. Anyway, it gives some peace of mind and personally I think it helps the patient a lot. Sometimes it's easier to just relax, sleep, etc when you don't have people worried sick about you obsessively watching you and getting anxious over every little thing.

We had a night sitter with my mom in the hospital. It was a woman in her 60s who was in good health and did this on the side. She was a godsend.

Anonymous wrote:Yes. I hired 3 people in the same family to be my Mom’s private duty aides. They arranged their own schedules, and often overlapped with the time I spent with my Mom in the hospital. In addition to the practical tasks that they handled, my Mom was both safer and less confused when she was able to get a private room and have someone with her that she knew well.

As others have said, hiring private duty aides is a pretty common practice.

Thx for your response. Was this a private arrangement or did you find through an agency? Appreciate if you can share how long you had this arrangement for your mom.

Thx again.

Yes. I hired 3 people in the same family to be my Mom’s private duty aides. They arranged their own schedules, and often overlapped with the time I spent with my Mom in the hospital. In addition to the practical tasks that they handled, my Mom was both safer and less confused when she was able to get a private room and have someone with her that she knew well.

As others have said, hiring private duty aides is a pretty common practice.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, having a home health aide sit with loved one in the hospital or even in rehab is a normal practice. You can call a home care agency or post on a neighborhood Listserv near the hospital to find such staffing. You might not get someone who can follow all the medical jargon. In the DC area I would expect to pay $25-$35 per hour for this.

Thx for your response. This is for metro NYC, so guessing a higher hourly rate.

Yes, having a home health aide sit with loved one in the hospital or even in rehab is a normal practice. You can call a home care agency or post on a neighborhood Listserv near the hospital to find such staffing. You might not get someone who can follow all the medical jargon. In the DC area I would expect to pay $25-$35 per hour for this.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need an aid if family can stop by for an hour or so.

The patient has a TBI. The family tries to be present for 9-12 hours/day and someone usually is. But clearly they need a break - the stress is really overwhelming that at the moment - and we are trying to figure out some options.

My mom has dementia and whenever she is hospitalized the hospital has an on-staff sitter in her room with her. But her stays are normally just a few days, I’m not sure if they’d provide one long term. I’ve had to hire caregivers for her in rehab. She’s now on hospice in memory care and I employ overnight care for her for 12 hours a night. It’s not cheap. But it’s necessary.

Is the issue that the patient would be lonely or would it be unsafe for them to be alone for any period of time?

Forgot to add: it’s a mix of lonely and unsafe.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need an aid if family can stop by for an hour or so.

The patient has a TBI. The family tries to be present for 9-12 hours/day and someone usually is. But clearly they need a break - the stress is really overwhelming that at the moment - and we are trying to figure out some options.

My mom has dementia and whenever she is hospitalized the hospital has an on-staff sitter in her room with her. But her stays are normally just a few days, I’m not sure if they’d provide one long term. I’ve had to hire caregivers for her in rehab. She’s now on hospice in memory care and I employ overnight care for her for 12 hours a night. It’s not cheap. But it’s necessary.

Is the issue that the patient would be lonely or would it be unsafe for them to be alone for any period of time?

Thx for your responses here. How did this work when she was in rehab? There is an on-staff sitter for the spouse, changes over the course of the day understandably because of shifts. So far, they are concerned about the quality of these sitters so we are thinking there may be some peace of mind if they hire their own person to be in the room when they cannot be present. This would not replace the hospital sitter.

Thx again for your responses. All best to your mom and to you and your family.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need an aid if family can stop by for an hour or so.

The patient has a TBI. The family tries to be present for 9-12 hours/day and someone usually is. But clearly they need a break - the stress is really overwhelming that at the moment - and we are trying to figure out some options.

My mom has dementia and whenever she is hospitalized the hospital has an on-staff sitter in her room with her. But her stays are normally just a few days, I’m not sure if they’d provide one long term. I’ve had to hire caregivers for her in rehab. She’s now on hospice in memory care and I employ overnight care for her for 12 hours a night. It’s not cheap. But it’s necessary.

Is the issue that the patient would be lonely or would it be unsafe for them to be alone for any period of time?