Anonymous
12/21/2025 18:04
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
Anonymous wrote:Imo this is a classic thing about the early stages of elder decline. They just get fixated on this sort of thing and they can’t handle the open loop. So to you it’s just one of 150 small housekeeping things but to her, her brain is arriving back at the “Larla hasn’t responded about that Pyrex dish” station every six minutes. And she’s losing the ability to recognize that the track management system is out of whack.
The kind thing is to just know that about her and respond on this kind of thing. But if you’re not going to, try to extend a little grace about the extra messages. We all need it for one thing or another.
BS. Op is an AH.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 18:03
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
Yes, you are the AH. You knew it was important to her and you just ignored. It takes 3 seconds to text ok back.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:59
Subject: Re: barrage of communications from MIL
I try to respond using the one business day rule if I don't want to respond to someone who is annoying me (usually at work).
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:43
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
You spent more time writing this whiny post then you would have spent responding the first day to your MIL.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:43
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
Not to mention, your first sentence is that *you need to return the dish.* Why haven’t you?? Instead you ignore her for days, just poking at her. You really TA.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:36
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
It takes far less time to simply reply with a thumbs up emoji or thumbs up emphasis than it would for you to yap about this on DCUM.
That said, if you responded like that or even a quick “will do” and she kept on, I’d tell your husband to tell her to contact him if she needs anything else, as you acknowledged her request, and you’re busy.
That said, if you responded like that or even a quick “will do” and she kept on, I’d tell your husband to tell her to contact him if she needs anything else, as you acknowledged her request, and you’re busy.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:28
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
My mom is like this, down to the texting that she left a VM. I totally get wanting to set boundaries and not "give in" but she's not going to change. It takes 3 seconds of my time to send a reply, even if it's to let her know I'm busy but will do X later.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:23
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
Anonymous wrote:Imo this is a classic thing about the early stages of elder decline. They just get fixated on this sort of thing and they can’t handle the open loop. So to you it’s just one of 150 small housekeeping things but to her, her brain is arriving back at the “Larla hasn’t responded about that Pyrex dish” station every six minutes. And she’s losing the ability to recognize that the track management system is out of whack.
The kind thing is to just know that about her and respond on this kind of thing. But if you’re not going to, try to extend a little grace about the extra messages. We all need it for one thing or another.
Yep. This is how my mom's anxiety is manifesting these days, and what I was going to say, but this poster said it better and nicer
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:22
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
Yes YATA
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:17
Subject: Re: barrage of communications from MIL
Anonymous wrote:OP, it would have cost you nothing but three seconds of your time to see the text about dish and hit the “thumbs up” on the message indicating that you saw it.
Yup. YTA.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:11
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
Imo this is a classic thing about the early stages of elder decline. They just get fixated on this sort of thing and they can’t handle the open loop. So to you it’s just one of 150 small housekeeping things but to her, her brain is arriving back at the “Larla hasn’t responded about that Pyrex dish” station every six minutes. And she’s losing the ability to recognize that the track management system is out of whack.
The kind thing is to just know that about her and respond on this kind of thing. But if you’re not going to, try to extend a little grace about the extra messages. We all need it for one thing or another.
The kind thing is to just know that about her and respond on this kind of thing. But if you’re not going to, try to extend a little grace about the extra messages. We all need it for one thing or another.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 17:07
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
She sent you a completely normal text about a dish left behind that you chose not to answer or respond to at all. You brought the barrage of communication on yourself. If you had acted like an adult and just sent a two word response or a thumbs up, she wouldn't need to still be reaching out days later.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 16:35
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
sometimes i ask myself how i would respond if this was a friend or someone i liked. in most cases, i would reply promptly or "thumbs up" to acknowledge text. but i get that mil is annoying and you don't want to jump at her command. for some folks who are demanding like this, i too try to establish boundaries so they don't expect me to be at their beck and call. but at least acknowledge your role in this power struggle and understand you're not completely innocent either.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 10:07
Subject: barrage of communications from MIL
OP you are seriously and super passive aggressive and this is entirely on you.
Anonymous
12/21/2025 10:06
Subject: Re: barrage of communications from MIL
OP, it would have cost you nothing but three seconds of your time to see the text about dish and hit the “thumbs up” on the message indicating that you saw it.