Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities? What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments? Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.

OP here. That's an interesting take. No, I don't define myself by my professional accomplishments. I have mentioned that I have wide-ranging interests. I have also successfully raised and launched well-adjusted children. It's just that I'm surprised that none of that really matters; to 60+ y.o men it comes down to homemaking, caregiving, companionship and (comparative) youth.

You don’t seem very self aware. You say you don’t define yourself by your professional accomplishments but that’s literally your title and first paragraph and only thing you say about yourself in your first post.

Now that you’ve been called on it, you drip-drop out some other details, you know, like the trolls around here.

NP. You need to go finish your GED or handle whatever deficiency it is that has you so threatened that OP is accomplished.

I’m a woman, an accomplished one at that. No one is threatened. It’s boring as hell to talk about your work on a date. I doubly feel that about men who do so.

Narcissism is the only thing you're coming off as accomplished that. I don't know why you have such a hard time understanding that OP is not you and is not trying to date you. What you find boring on a date is irrelevant here. If talking about her extensive collection of marbles gathered all over the world is what will make OP fulfilled in love, then your advice should be structured towards helping her achieve that, not towards breaking her down and convincing her she has to be someone different to date the way you think is proper.

I’m willing to bet most people find work talk boring on dates. You sound very defensive- I guess that’s your style. You’ll note that OP has come back and tried to tell us she’s much more multi dimensional. You know, dripping out new info like a good troll.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - this is your presentation of yourself, and how you feel about yourself. As an accomplished professional. And you meet the men who look at you as a potential employee for the job - caring for him

You need to engage your feminine energy more, and start feeling yourself feminine. How often do you have sex, think about sex, buy new bathing suits and dresses, change your hair color? Can you discuss sexual preferences on date 3-4 when time is right?

I have a different issue: I mostly have very intense sexual relationships with men my age, but can't fall into them as I need the next partner not to be bored. I was married for 19 years and gate being tied up to a specific man, confined to anything besides what I want.

Jesus, log off already. Whoever OP attracts by changing herself so dramatically will end up making her miserable or resenting her as who she really is eventually comes out.

It’s not about changing herself. HER SELF is an office professional.
Other women (who might be no less accomplished) identify themselves as feminine sexual beings in the first place. It’s great to be high achieving but it shouldn’t be the main focus of her personal story at these dates .

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities? What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments? Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.

OP here. That's an interesting take. No, I don't define myself by my professional accomplishments. I have mentioned that I have wide-ranging interests. I have also successfully raised and launched well-adjusted children. It's just that I'm surprised that none of that really matters; to 60+ y.o men it comes down to homemaking, caregiving, companionship and (comparative) youth.

You don’t seem very self aware. You say you don’t define yourself by your professional accomplishments but that’s literally your title and first paragraph and only thing you say about yourself in your first post.

Now that you’ve been called on it, you drip-drop out some other details, you know, like the trolls around here.

NP. You need to go finish your GED or handle whatever deficiency it is that has you so threatened that OP is accomplished.

I’m a woman, an accomplished one at that. No one is threatened. It’s boring as hell to talk about your work on a date. I doubly feel that about men who do so.

Narcissism is the only thing you're coming off as accomplished that. I don't know why you have such a hard time understanding that OP is not you and is not trying to date you. What you find boring on a date is irrelevant here. If talking about her extensive collection of marbles gathered all over the world is what will make OP fulfilled in love, then your advice should be structured towards helping her achieve that, not towards breaking her down and convincing her she has to be someone different to date the way you think is proper.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - this is your presentation of yourself, and how you feel about yourself. As an accomplished professional. And you meet the men who look at you as a potential employee for the job - caring for him

You need to engage your feminine energy more, and start feeling yourself feminine. How often do you have sex, think about sex, buy new bathing suits and dresses, change your hair color? Can you discuss sexual preferences on date 3-4 when time is right?

I have a different issue: I mostly have very intense sexual relationships with men my age, but can't fall into them as I need the next partner not to be bored. I was married for 19 years and gate being tied up to a specific man, confined to anything besides what I want.

Jesus, log off already. Whoever OP attracts by changing herself so dramatically will end up making her miserable or resenting her as who she really is eventually comes out.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities? What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments? Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.

OP here. That's an interesting take. No, I don't define myself by my professional accomplishments. I have mentioned that I have wide-ranging interests. I have also successfully raised and launched well-adjusted children. It's just that I'm surprised that none of that really matters; to 60+ y.o men it comes down to homemaking, caregiving, companionship and (comparative) youth.

You don’t seem very self aware. You say you don’t define yourself by your professional accomplishments but that’s literally your title and first paragraph and only thing you say about yourself in your first post.

Now that you’ve been called on it, you drip-drop out some other details, you know, like the trolls around here.

NP. You need to go finish your GED or handle whatever deficiency it is that has you so threatened that OP is accomplished.

I’m a woman, an accomplished one at that. No one is threatened. It’s boring as hell to talk about your work on a date. I doubly feel that about men who do so.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP again. Just pointing out the obvious but you are probably mostly dating retired men, they have left the world of work behind or soon will. So they are much less interested in the professional sphere and are basically looking for a woman who still wants to have sex and will be a nice companion for them.

OP here. That may be true, but their lack of empathy bothers me. They don't seem to recognize that my profession is a big part of my life. There are no questions about how my day was at the office, what my current issues are, what work changes am I grappling with.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities? What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments? Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.

OP here. That's an interesting take. No, I don't define myself by my professional accomplishments. I have mentioned that I have wide-ranging interests. I have also successfully raised and launched well-adjusted children. It's just that I'm surprised that none of that really matters; to 60+ y.o men it comes down to homemaking, caregiving, companionship and (comparative) youth.

You don’t seem very self aware. You say you don’t define yourself by your professional accomplishments but that’s literally your title and first paragraph and only thing you say about yourself in your first post.

Now that you’ve been called on it, you drip-drop out some other details, you know, like the trolls around here.

NP. You need to go finish your GED or handle whatever deficiency it is that has you so threatened that OP is accomplished.

Anonymous wrote:OP - this is your presentation of yourself, and how you feel about yourself. As an accomplished professional. And you meet the men who look at you as a potential employee for the job - caring for him

You need to engage your feminine energy more, and start feeling yourself feminine. How often do you have sex, think about sex, buy new bathing suits and dresses, change your hair color? Can you discuss sexual preferences on date 3-4 when time is right?

I have a different issue: I mostly have very intense sexual relationships with men my age, but can't fall into them as I need the next partner not to be bored. I was married for 19 years and gate being tied up to a specific man, confined to anything besides what I want.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities? What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments? Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.

OP here. That's an interesting take. No, I don't define myself by my professional accomplishments. I have mentioned that I have wide-ranging interests. I have also successfully raised and launched well-adjusted children. It's just that I'm surprised that none of that really matters; to 60+ y.o men it comes down to homemaking, caregiving, companionship and (comparative) youth.

You don’t seem very self aware. You say you don’t define yourself by your professional accomplishments but that’s literally your title and first paragraph and only thing you say about yourself in your first post.

Now that you’ve been called on it, you drip-drop out some other details, you know, like the trolls around here.

Anonymous wrote:Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities? What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments? Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your post is a little confusing. The title of your post suggests that you define yourself by your accomplishments. And your first paragraph is all about that. Then you say that dating earlier iwas all about building a family (which doesn't have to do much with professional accomplishments).

Why are you surprised that men are drawn to your personal rather than professional capabilities? What men were ever impressed or turned on by a woman's professional accomplishments? Of course men in their 60s on up are going to care about how good you are at caregiving, they're not interested in your ability to raise kids or build a family.

It may be that you are turning off men your own age by making them feel small.

OP here. That's an interesting take. No, I don't define myself by my professional accomplishments. I have mentioned that I have wide-ranging interests. I have also successfully raised and launched well-adjusted children. It's just that I'm surprised that none of that really matters; to 60+ y.o men it comes down to homemaking, caregiving, companionship and (comparative) youth.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP again. Just pointing out the obvious but you are probably mostly dating retired men, they have left the world of work behind or soon will. So they are much less interested in the professional sphere and are basically looking for a woman who still wants to have sex and will be a nice companion for them.

OP here. That may be true, but their lack of empathy bothers me. They don't seem to recognize that my profession is a big part of my life. There are no questions about how my day was at the office, what my current issues are, what work changes am I grappling with.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:PP again. Just pointing out the obvious but you are probably mostly dating retired men, they have left the world of work behind or soon will. So they are much less interested in the professional sphere and are basically looking for a woman who still wants to have sex and will be a nice companion for them.

OP here. That may be true, but their lack of empathy bothers me. They don't seem to recognize that my profession is a big part of my life. There are no questions about how my day was at the office, what my current issues are, what work changes am I grappling with.

Anonymous wrote:OP - this is your presentation of yourself, and how you feel about yourself. As an accomplished professional. And you meet the men who look at you as a potential employee for the job - caring for him

You need to engage your feminine energy more, and start feeling yourself feminine. How often do you have sex, think about sex, buy new bathing suits and dresses, change your hair color? Can you discuss sexual preferences on date 3-4 when time is right?

I have a different issue: I mostly have very intense sexual relationships with men my age, but can't fall into them as I need the next partner not to be bored. I was married for 19 years and gate being tied up to a specific man, confined to anything besides what I want.