How often will you see these kids? If you will be seeing them often and form a relationship with them, gifts are appropriate. If you might see them every couple of years at a wedding/funeral, I probably would not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you send birthday gifts to your niece? They will then expect you to send them gifts on their birthdays. Don't get on this gift train unless it is your love language.

Love language is a bit overhyped.

If you don't enjoy shopping, wrapping and mailing gifts, don't start giving gifts to people who don't expect it.

Anonymous wrote:Do you send birthday gifts to your niece? They will then expect you to send them gifts on their birthdays. Don't get on this gift train unless it is your love language.

Love language is a bit overhyped.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think a college student really cares about a gift from her mom's new husband's sister. If you're not meeting in person, I wouldn't bother. They know if their dad divorces again, poof.

That’s the problem with people. The whole “I wouldn’t bother”. It’s a nice gesture especially for her brother who will be happy that you’ve included the other girls,

Personally, as a stepchild, I find it awkward to be given gifts by people I barely know. I really dislike the big happy family agenda being pushed on me. I'm not family with people I've hardly or never met. The gift may be well-intentioned but the vibe is coercive. I don't want a relationship of mutual obligation and that's what gift-giving is, among adults. The amount of time I want to spend on or with step-extended family is zero. And I know that if my dad divorced his wife, none of these people would ever care about me again.

Anonymous wrote:Send them individual gifts, even if just gift cards or whatever. Or ask your brother what they are into. It’s ok to spend more on your bio-niece, since you’re obviously closer to her. But individual gifts for the others is a good investment in family relations.

+1
Good advice. You can also just send fancy chocolates or something because they are older. Send a toy or something different to your younger niece.

Did we get a budget? My go to for late elementary in the $25-$100 range is slightly nicer craft stuff. A big pack of embroidery floss in a zillion colors for making bracelets with some quality clasps. Nice(r) watercolors. Nice gemstone beads if they’re into that, idk if it’s still there but there was a bead store in DuPont circle that was great for this.

I think the crossbody bag is a good idea. Even elementary girls use them. Or a gift card, card and chocolates. It’s a very nice thought.

Anonymous wrote:I don't think a college student really cares about a gift from her mom's new husband's sister. If you're not meeting in person, I wouldn't bother. They know if their dad divorces again, poof.

That’s the problem with people. The whole “I wouldn’t bother”. It’s a nice gesture especially for her brother who will be happy that you’ve included the other girls,

Do you send birthday gifts to your niece? They will then expect you to send them gifts on their birthdays. Don't get on this gift train unless it is your love language.

Anonymous wrote:Just send a gift to your bio niece. These other kids don’t expect a gift from you.

If you were meeting in person, I would have gotten them all something but really no need to mail them a gift.

This. They would not be expecting a gift from you any more than your bio niece would be expecting gifts from her stepmom's siblings.

I'd send each a giftcard, chocolates and a card.

Just send a gift to your bio niece. These other kids don’t expect a gift from you.

If you were meeting in person, I would have gotten them all something but really no need to mail them a gift.

My nieces are between those ages and I got them cross body wallets/bags last year. They seemed to like them (at least I’ve seen them use them) and they are practical for any age.