It is tricky because sometimes sharing too much information leads schools to have preconceived notions of a student. You mention your daughter is well behaved and almost at grade level. So what help are they really giving her?

My sister was having a hard time with her son and the private school because the private school thought that every single behavior was due to his ADHD. She would go for a parent day or field trip and there could be two other students engaging in the same behavior but her son was the only one called out for behavior. Then a teacher would ask if he took medication that day.

So she tried public school and it seemed so disorganized. The school would say he was doing well and she would say but I found all his homework bunched up in the bottom of his backpack. Then the school would say it was okay he wasn't turning it in or doing much work.

When they moved for her husband's job she enrolled him in a grade lower (he was born in late spring) at a Christian school and told the school she had only tried public but then had been homeschooling him. She also said nothing about his diagnosis.

Having textbook, workbooks, and a strict structure worked really well for him. The schedule stayed pretty consistent week by week. The teachers had to send out all the upcoming assignments they were going to work on the following week by Friday afternoon. Spelling and math tests Friday, all assignments and homework were listed in the online grade book. There was a requirement that the teacher had a maximum of 7 days to grade all work, enter it into the computer so the parents could see online, and return it. There were students ahead of grade level, at grade level, and slightly below.

I meant to add though that if they really don’t think they can help her, you may want to look at other alternatives. I know, it sucks. I’m not sure how hard her school is but if she’s in a school like Sidwell or Holton, it may become too hard.

I would continue with the tutoring and partner with the learning specialists in what else you can do. My DD-10 is probably in a similar situation in her private school.

Anonymous wrote:Thanks for the replies. Sad for DD because she had been in a SN lite and in public school. The SN lite was not at all up to par academically and there were was only 1 girl peer in her class. The public school was just too disorganized, did not provide any meaningful hail services, and there was bullying. This school we thought was a great fit. It's the first school she enjoyed going to and where she has made the greatest progress.

What makes you think that they are gearing up to counsel you out? The fact of asking for an updated neuropsych doesn't signal that.

Thanks for the replies. Sad for DD because she had been in a SN lite and in public school. The SN lite was not at all up to par academically and there were was only 1 girl peer in her class. The public school was just too disorganized, did not provide any meaningful hail services, and there was bullying. This school we thought was a great fit. It's the first school she enjoyed going to and where she has made the greatest progress.

You can request an evaluation from the public school system even if you are in a private school. That could give you updated testing and info if she would qualify for an IEP in public.