Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How close is husband to being able to get early retirement? If he is within a few years, maybe do 3 until then. Lifetime federal health benefits are a big deal.

OP here. DH could early-retire in two years, assuming his agency still offers early retirement then. So that is a consideration. DH really likes the potential new city. He just does not like the thought of looking for a new job.

Why give up early retirement in 2 years? Definitely 3 then, you move and telework when you can for the next 2 years then dh can move

That's a huge "if." It's not a continuous offer for feds. It was offered twice as part of the "fork" this spring and you had a week to decide. Now you just have to wait for regular retirement, a RIF, or a new offer. I definitely wouldn't make life plans assuming it will be available.

Personally as a former academic and current fed in what I would have called a dream job just a year ago, I think dream jobs are a mirage and wouldn't uproot my family and ask my husband to give up a job for one at this stage in life. I would make this decision based on where you and DH both want to LIVE long term. If the new job turned as crappy as your fed job, would you still he glad because it gave you the opportunity to move to the new place? Or would you wish you hadn't made the leap because it really was mainly about the job?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How close is husband to being able to get early retirement? If he is within a few years, maybe do 3 until then. Lifetime federal health benefits are a big deal.

OP here. DH could early-retire in two years, assuming his agency still offers early retirement then. So that is a consideration. DH really likes the potential new city. He just does not like the thought of looking for a new job.

Why give up early retirement in 2 years? Definitely 3 then, you move and telework when you can for the next 2 years then dh can move

If this really is the opportunity of a lifetime, your husband should make it work for you. The federal benefits are good, but after this year, I can’t imagine anyone wanting to stay in DC just for that reason. As others have said, federal jobs are no longer secure, so there is a very real chance that at least one of you will be unemployed in the next year or two.

4 is possible.

I'm sorry but

1. Decline the job offer and remain miserable as a fed, hoping things might change.

BUT change it to Decline the job offer and find something in DMV or remote.

I don't have faith that any job is secure right now (particularly a new person joining)-sorry- and a 7th grader and their social needs are fragile.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Accept new job. Live out option 3 for 6 months to make sure you love the job and scope out the location, housing market, etc. And if it’s as great as you thought- only then does DH quit his job and everyone moves.

This is what you do.

This. Allow DC to finish the school year here while you confirm the job as as great as you think it is.

Anonymous wrote:How close is husband to being able to get early retirement? If he is within a few years, maybe do 3 until then. Lifetime federal health benefits are a big deal.

OP here. DH could early-retire in two years, assuming his agency still offers early retirement then. So that is a consideration. DH really likes the potential new city. He just does not like the thought of looking for a new job.

How close is husband to being able to get early retirement? If he is within a few years, maybe do 3 until then. Lifetime federal health benefits are a big deal.

Really a question of what your DH thinks. 2 is reasonable but only if he’s on board.

Otherwise keep looking for something in this area.

Is your current job actively unpleasant or is it just that this year of chaos has with you down? If the latter, it seems less urgent.

2 or 4. 4 gives time to sell house but prices are dropping so 2 better. Also starting a new school is easier if it's in session and kid knows at least some by sight before summer rather than showing up in summer and starting cold in fall session.

Anonymous wrote:4. You go, your kid and husband stay until the end of the school year and then move to the new city over the summer. That gives everyone time to adjust, and your husband can look for a new job in the new area.

Also this way you can do a short-term rental in the new place while figuring out the best neighborhood for you and your family to settle.

4. You go, your kid and husband stay until the end of the school year and then move to the new city over the summer. That gives everyone time to adjust, and your husband can look for a new job in the new area.

How long is the flight back to DC? How often could you do it realistically?

You clearly have rose colored glasses on, regarding the area, the new job, etc. I think you have to account for some of the risks, for example that DH can't find a job there, or hates the job he gets, or that the new job isn't all you think it will be.

I would probably start it and try for six months with you living separately before you make any bigger moves.

3 while DH looks for a remote job or a job in new location. When he has that, he and DC move.

2