Anonymous
11/18/2025 10:04
Subject: Re:Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:I would be sitting down with my child on Sunday and reviewing all of SIS and Schoology and putting together a list of work that needs to be completed. He would come home, have 30 minutes of down time and then he would be at the dining table doing his work. If he didn’t have anything to turn in, he would be reviewing past notes to learn that material. this continues until he has solid effort scores an his grades improve.
Once he figures out that he will have more free time if he does what he is supposed to and is doing it without my having to be there, he can stop doing an hour a day.
If his grades don’t come up and he is still skipping things, then we start some testing for ADHD/LDs an we start removing extra curricular activities. I don’t think ADHD and LDs are the answer for the vast majority of kids but a smart kid can mask that they are there. They can raise their head in MS and HS when work loads greatly increase and there are more demands on students.
+1 to the plan. If it were ADHD, even for a smart kid, there would be symptoms outside of the school setting too.
For many NT kids, organizational skills need to be taught. Sitting down with the kid and writing down everything that needs to be done is an excellent first step to teaching those skills. The child can be walked through the process as many times as it takes to habitualize the process, and will eventually learn to take control of organizing themselves.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 09:33
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a kid who needs to be grounded and have his phone taken away until he brings his grades up. He needs to realize his job is school and he needs to focus only on that.
If your child was struggling to swim would you throw him in the deep end until he was swimming well? No, you would give him swimming lessons. This sounds like a kid is missing (or still developing) certain skills and needs help, not punishment.
Disagree. Everyone wants to find an excuse for why kids aren't trying, they have ADHD, they're autistic, they have anxiety, their pet rabbit died. Sometimes kids just need to get told what to do, and have strict parents. Enough with the coddling. It's not that this kid CAN'T. He WON'T. That's unacceptable.
PREACHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Anonymous
11/18/2025 09:30
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
This happened to my DS. I thought it was ADHD and it may be but ultimately it was a matter of him caring more. When I showed him options (for high school and what grades were needed, and colleges and career) he tried harder. Went from Cs to almost straight As. When I asked how it happened, DS said he decided he wanted to get better grades and just tried harder. Just my personal experience.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 09:18
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
in middle school they are like D's
Anonymous
11/18/2025 09:01
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
Do you have a middle schooler? Getting Cs in 8th grade is bad.
Could be a kid taking a couple high school classes. Math can ramp up by 8th grade.
I have a feeling this isn’t a kid in precalc
Could be in Algebra and a foreign language. DS took Algebra 1H and a foreign language for HS credit in 7th grade and is in geometry and a foreign language as an 8th grader. Kids struggling with Algebra in 8th grade is a common thread theme in the FCPS forum. HS classes move at a faster pace and are more demanding. Some kids can handle the pacing and material in MS, other kids struggle because they don't have the executive functioning skills to keep up with the pace but will be ready for the material in another year.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 08:59
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
Do you have a middle schooler? Getting Cs in 8th grade is bad.
A bad grade depends on the kid. I had C's in MS in math and science but I had LDs that I was struggling with. I did all my homework, worked with my teacher, and worked with a tutor. My parents were fine with my C's because that was the best I could do. I had A's in English and social studies because my LDs did not impact those classes in the same way.
DCUM seems to think that kids get As for breathing in school but that is not the case. I know plenty of kids working hard for Bs and plenty of kids slacking and getting Cs. I also know kids who are doing the work they are asked to do and getting As without any real stress. Just like it was when I was a kid.
If you have a kid who is not doing their work and earning a C, then the C is not a good grade. If you have a kid working their butt and getting a C, then a C is a good grade for that kid. Your job as a parent is to find a way to help support that C kid and figure out what might be getting in the way of a higher grade or accept that your kid maybe is not strong in that area and support to the best of your ability.
Did you read the post? OPs kid is getting Cs bc he is missing assignments, not completing work, and not studying for tests. Often intentionally and then being dishonest. This is entirely different from your childhood situation
Agreed, the situation is different but that is different than a blanket statement that C's in 8th grade is bad, which is what I was responding to.
The OPs kid could be doing better in school. There might be some ADHD/LD issue that is just surfacing as the demands of school are overcoming natural intelligence or ability. It might be that the kid is having to work for the first time and struggling to figure it out and is avoiding the work. The OP has to figure that out.
But a C is not automatically a bad grade. And I think it is ok to remind parents that not every C is a sign that a kid is slacking. It might be in the OPs case but it is not always.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 08:50
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
Do you have a middle schooler? Getting Cs in 8th grade is bad.
Could be a kid taking a couple high school classes. Math can ramp up by 8th grade.
I have a feeling this isn’t a kid in precalc
Anonymous
11/18/2025 08:49
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
Do you have a middle schooler? Getting Cs in 8th grade is bad.
A bad grade depends on the kid. I had C's in MS in math and science but I had LDs that I was struggling with. I did all my homework, worked with my teacher, and worked with a tutor. My parents were fine with my C's because that was the best I could do. I had A's in English and social studies because my LDs did not impact those classes in the same way.
DCUM seems to think that kids get As for breathing in school but that is not the case. I know plenty of kids working hard for Bs and plenty of kids slacking and getting Cs. I also know kids who are doing the work they are asked to do and getting As without any real stress. Just like it was when I was a kid.
If you have a kid who is not doing their work and earning a C, then the C is not a good grade. If you have a kid working their butt and getting a C, then a C is a good grade for that kid. Your job as a parent is to find a way to help support that C kid and figure out what might be getting in the way of a higher grade or accept that your kid maybe is not strong in that area and support to the best of your ability.
Did you read the post? OPs kid is getting Cs bc he is missing assignments, not completing work, and not studying for tests. Often intentionally and then being dishonest. This is entirely different from your childhood situation
Anonymous
11/18/2025 08:45
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
Do you have a middle schooler? Getting Cs in 8th grade is bad.
A bad grade depends on the kid. I had C's in MS in math and science but I had LDs that I was struggling with. I did all my homework, worked with my teacher, and worked with a tutor. My parents were fine with my C's because that was the best I could do. I had A's in English and social studies because my LDs did not impact those classes in the same way.
DCUM seems to think that kids get As for breathing in school but that is not the case. I know plenty of kids working hard for Bs and plenty of kids slacking and getting Cs. I also know kids who are doing the work they are asked to do and getting As without any real stress. Just like it was when I was a kid.
If you have a kid who is not doing their work and earning a C, then the C is not a good grade. If you have a kid working their butt and getting a C, then a C is a good grade for that kid. Your job as a parent is to find a way to help support that C kid and figure out what might be getting in the way of a higher grade or accept that your kid maybe is not strong in that area and support to the best of your ability.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 07:39
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
Do you have a middle schooler? Getting Cs in 8th grade is bad.
Could be a kid taking a couple high school classes. Math can ramp up by 8th grade.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 07:38
Subject: Re:Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
When this was our kid in middle school, the phone access was pared way back, a lot of assistance and coaching was given for executive functioning, we got a tutor in one subject, and socializing was off the table. He was allowed to keep up his EC.
And no he does not have ADHD. He’s in high school now and handles his academics. Some kids need more runway to get there.
And no he does not have ADHD. He’s in high school now and handles his academics. Some kids need more runway to get there.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 07:38
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
Do you have a middle schooler? Getting Cs in 8th grade is bad.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 07:36
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a kid who needs to be grounded and have his phone taken away until he brings his grades up. He needs to realize his job is school and he needs to focus only on that.
If your child was struggling to swim would you throw him in the deep end until he was swimming well? No, you would give him swimming lessons. This sounds like a kid is missing (or still developing) certain skills and needs help, not punishment.
Disagree. Everyone wants to find an excuse for why kids aren't trying, they have ADHD, they're autistic, they have anxiety, their pet rabbit died. Sometimes kids just need to get told what to do, and have strict parents. Enough with the coddling. It's not that this kid CAN'T. He WON'T. That's unacceptable.
Agree, somewhat. There needs to be a middle ground. I don’t think you should come down like a sledge hammer, but there should be some consequences. If one think to have difficulty doing work and staying organized, but you are making an effort and seeking out help. But it’s another to lie about it, purposefully not complete work, and go off to friends house instead. Everyone has struggles to various degrees- your kid needs help maturing and realizing where his deficiencies are and implementing way to help himself or at the very least take your help. Taking away phone and video games helps expedite this maturing process.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 06:05
Subject: Re:Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
I would be sitting down with my child on Sunday and reviewing all of SIS and Schoology and putting together a list of work that needs to be completed. He would come home, have 30 minutes of down time and then he would be at the dining table doing his work. If he didn’t have anything to turn in, he would be reviewing past notes to learn that material. this continues until he has solid effort scores an his grades improve.
Once he figures out that he will have more free time if he does what he is supposed to and is doing it without my having to be there, he can stop doing an hour a day.
If his grades don’t come up and he is still skipping things, then we start some testing for ADHD/LDs an we start removing extra curricular activities. I don’t think ADHD and LDs are the answer for the vast majority of kids but a smart kid can mask that they are there. They can raise their head in MS and HS when work loads greatly increase and there are more demands on students.
Once he figures out that he will have more free time if he does what he is supposed to and is doing it without my having to be there, he can stop doing an hour a day.
If his grades don’t come up and he is still skipping things, then we start some testing for ADHD/LDs an we start removing extra curricular activities. I don’t think ADHD and LDs are the answer for the vast majority of kids but a smart kid can mask that they are there. They can raise their head in MS and HS when work loads greatly increase and there are more demands on students.
Anonymous
11/18/2025 06:03
Subject: Bright 8th grader avoiding work and getting Cs/Ds
Anonymous wrote:But C’s are not bad grades. Remember: a C simply means average.
In private school, yes but if kids get Cs in public schools these days, it’s the equivalent of an F.