Anonymous wrote:Serious question (because both my kids are still in elementary) - are HS sports still the end all, be all, with year-round $$$ teams being so prevalent? Do the top soccer players, swimmers, or baseball players even play for their HS teams or are they just pure travel/competitive team players? I can see it being a big thing for some sports (football obviously, maybe basketball although private teams seem to be big for that too) but I assumed private teams had taken over the top spots in some of these sports. And then the private sports-oriented HS’s like the St. James Academy are starting to dominate the HS leagues too.

At least with some sports, at the high school level, travel sort of shuts down during the HS season so those kids can play HS.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you also feel bad for the kids who are cut from youth orchestras or other selective groups when these groups become really competitive, after they've played all their lives?

Good. Nice to know we're not ignoring other activities.

Serious question- does this happen? Like you don’t make orchestra at your high school? It wasn’t that way when I was younger but who even knows now.

OP I am already worried about this. Despite our repeated attempts to help him find other interests my son’s great passion is soccer. He is good but it’s very possible he will not be good enough to make a high school team around here. I keep hearing horror stories about kids who do travel soccer starting at age 7 who don’t make the team and just completely stop playing. Are there rec programs for high school students?

Tell me you don't travel in ultra-competitive academic circles without telling me you don't travel in ultra-competitive academic circles.

Easy - just have your kid give their spot up to someone more deserving. Then no hard feelings.

I went to a private boarding school that did it well. They had Varsity, JV and instead of the horrible PE of public school you picked a sport if you weren’t on a team. You played it for an entire semester. It was so much fun and I tried several sports that I would never have done in a public high school. I truly suck at any sport that involves running around chasing a ball but I got pretty good at field hockey. Being short, I got to avoid the abject humiliation of basketball. I got to avoid gymnastics thank god! Loved running, fencing, horse back riding and swimming!

I really think school should have a third no cut team. It’s not rocket science and the physical fitness/team fun could go a long way for mental health.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you also feel bad for the kids who are cut from youth orchestras or other selective groups when these groups become really competitive, after they've played all their lives?

Good. Nice to know we're not ignoring other activities.

There are competitive audition-based orchestras. But there are also school bands and marching bands where anyone is welcome - that’s what’s missing for sports.

It's not though. Do x-country, track and field, indoor track and field, crew starts in high school and low barrier to entry, swim/dive is no cut at some (all?) schools, wrestling is no cut at some schools.

If your kid is playing soccer or basketball or baseball or one of these sports where the travel sport industrial complex starts up super young, yes those teams are going to have too many kids trying to get on the team. There are other options.

This is going to come across as contrarian here but try this out: what if instead of frowning upon competition and banning all competitive endeavors in the name of feelings, we instead provided more opportunities for kids to engage in and/or out of school (for free if needed)?

Protecting (typical) kids from rejection their entire childhood to the greatest extent possible deprives them of the opportunity to build resilience and results in young adults who have very poor coping mechanisms, really underdeveloped human skills, and some big deficits in being able to transition to the real world. I'm a college professor, so ask me how I know this I guess.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you also feel bad for the kids who are cut from youth orchestras or other selective groups when these groups become really competitive, after they've played all their lives?

Good. Nice to know we're not ignoring other activities.

Serious question- does this happen? Like you don’t make orchestra at your high school? It wasn’t that way when I was younger but who even knows now.

OP I am already worried about this. Despite our repeated attempts to help him find other interests my son’s great passion is soccer. He is good but it’s very possible he will not be good enough to make a high school team around here. I keep hearing horror stories about kids who do travel soccer starting at age 7 who don’t make the team and just completely stop playing. Are there rec programs for high school students?

Yes, even arts programs are competitive in a large high school. Theater cast is very competitive. There are cuts and it's competitive to get large roles. Band and choir are competitive to get into higher level groups and usually there is a lower band/choir that takes everyone and the kids who are only making it into that band drop the activity at some point because it's usually freshman.

Our large public high school has a no cut sport option (and sometimes more than 1) every season for kids. I think this is the way to stay active and be with your friends.

Anonymous wrote:Do you also feel bad for the kids who are cut from youth orchestras or other selective groups when these groups become really competitive, after they've played all their lives?

Good. Nice to know we're not ignoring other activities.

There are competitive audition-based orchestras. But there are also school bands and marching bands where anyone is welcome - that’s what’s missing for sports.

I have an 8th grader. She’s only played basketball for one season competitively, this winter will be 2nd year.
Soccer she’s done rec for 3 years and now plays
She loves both and wants to play in HS but she knows it’s tryouts and she might not make it. She’ll still have travel soccer for definite and I know OBGC has 8th/9th basketball teams so she’ll have one more year or rec basketball. She’ll be ok. There are other ways to keep active with sports.

Serious question (because both my kids are still in elementary) - are HS sports still the end all, be all, with year-round $$$ teams being so prevalent? Do the top soccer players, swimmers, or baseball players even play for their HS teams or are they just pure travel/competitive team players? I can see it being a big thing for some sports (football obviously, maybe basketball although private teams seem to be big for that too) but I assumed private teams had taken over the top spots in some of these sports. And then the private sports-oriented HS’s like the St. James Academy are starting to dominate the HS leagues too.

That’s why there are rec sports leagues. There’s always a place for these athletes. Switch gears.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you also feel bad for the kids who are cut from youth orchestras or other selective groups when these groups become really competitive, after they've played all their lives?

Good. Nice to know we're not ignoring other activities.

Serious question- does this happen? Like you don’t make orchestra at your high school? It wasn’t that way when I was younger but who even knows now.

OP I am already worried about this. Despite our repeated attempts to help him find other interests my son’s great passion is soccer. He is good but it’s very possible he will not be good enough to make a high school team around here. I keep hearing horror stories about kids who do travel soccer starting at age 7 who don’t make the team and just completely stop playing. Are there rec programs for high school students?

Just keep playing club.