Anonymous wrote:

OP I am thinking of you and especially your mother. 🌹🌹

Thank you. Hospice has helped with pain and also just been a good source of assistance and advice. Tramadol and low dose morphine is helping the pain but I’m pretty sure she’s on the downward path. I have such mixed feelings, mostly sad for her because she is confused and scared.

DP. I wish her a quick and easy path

I'm sorry to read about your Mother's passing. You did a wonderful job honoring your Mother's wishes. I wish you and your family well.

PP, you are a ghoul. Show some decency.

OP, I'm very sorry about your mom. I'm glad you were able to work with hospice to honor her wishes about care and quality of life, and I'm glad you were able to sit with her at the end.

Anonymous wrote:My 85 yo mom, stage 6 dementia but otherwise pretty healthy, fell in her memory care(left her walker in another room). In tons of pain, currently at the ER, just found out she has fractured her pelvis. What does recovery look like? Is this like the broken hip that leads to the slow decline? Is it with calling for hospice evaluation? She has an advanced directive calling for comfort care only at this point and she is so uncomfortable right now, breaks my heart.

Say what you want to say to her now.

Also, they intentionally kill people in those facilities. It's a well known but little spoken secret that they want to get them in and out fast for the money.

Oh, op, I’m so sorry. It sounds similar to the situation with my mil (I posted early in the thread). It was so hard on dh because it seemed so sudden. She had seemed pretty healthy and strong (except for dementia) before her fall. Your mother is lucky to have had you there watching out for her and keeping her company. Sending you peace.

My condolences, OP. I'm glad you were able to be with her at the end.

Op here: my mom passed away yesterday. Hospice was involved and they tell me she was comfortable throughout (lots of morphine) even though watching her transition through to death was pretty intense. But I was with her for her last breath, and am grateful for it. I guess I will feel relief that her suffering is over, she was terrified of dementia and being besides, though at the moment I just feel grief and loss. It was shockingly fast—just under a month from when she fell.

A bad fall in the elderly especially with dementia is usually not a good outcome. What uou can do minimize the complications of immobility is best. She should be getting PT and OT in the hospital who usually start with helping her get out of bed and back to doing things. If she can go back to her facility with more help and HH therapy that is usually best. The good thing about a pelvic fracture is unlike a hip fracture they don’t usually require surgery.

🌹🌹

I am so sorry. Are there things she can still enjoy, like listening to familiar music?

I have brought in a lot more cds that she likes and am basically playing music and holding her hand. In the past few days her ability to speak and swallow have gone downhill significantly. When people talk about a post-fall decline, i get it now. I mean, her dementia was pretty bad before the fall but physically she had no major health problems. Walked a ton, able to get in/out of chairs and bed fairly easily, and generally no big health problems. Now it seems she may not last through this year. I will say that she is not in pain and seems peaceful most of the time. I'm kind of a mess, and I thought I would have been more prepared, having been dealing with her dementia/decline for several years.

I am so sorry. Are there things she can still enjoy, like listening to familiar music?

OP I am thinking of you and especially your mother. 🌹🌹

Thank you. Hospice has helped with pain and also just been a good source of assistance and advice. Tramadol and low dose morphine is helping the pain but I’m pretty sure she’s on the downward path. I have such mixed feelings, mostly sad for her because she is confused and scared.

OP I am thinking of you and especially your mother. 🌹🌹

Anonymous wrote:Op here quick update, hospice evaluation happening tomorrow. Based on the way the leadership at her memory care reacted, I’m sure she will qualify. It will be good to have someone who can guide us realistically and prioritize her comfort and peace. I’m sure my mom knows that something has changed; she was crying this morning and I haven’t seen her cry in a while.

Your poor mom. I hope they can control her pain.

Once she's in hospice they usually are well versed in pain management. She can live longer than 6 mo and they won't unhospice her.