Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
A word about "normal" clothes: sometimes it takes a great eye for color, texture and proportions, to put together a casual outfit!

I dress much better now in my 40s than I did in previous decades, because I have finally understood what works with my figure. Took me a while... I agree with PP that it's about finding cuts of clothes that hit just right for where your curves hit, ie visual transition points. And then going with a color palette that pleases the eye.

Visual transition points make so much sense. Thanks to PPs for articulating this. And this is where I now realize I struggle. I have an extremely short torso for my 5’ 10” height. The natural waist/ curve on tops/ dresses/blazers all hit where my hips start to widen, not at my actual waist. And I look bigger than my size 4/ 130lb suggests. If I try to tailor to where my waist is, my legs look disproportionately and unnaturally long. Open to suggestions on how to dress for my body type

Anonymous wrote:I think I’m one of these women, and I work in fintech surrounded by them, so I’ll share a few ways I got here—

First, I owned the fact that leveling up my look was part of my job once I got to the exec level. So I used to like really chase sales or put off Botox and although YMMV, once I just embraced that this is part of the deal in the dumb world we live in, I sort of relaxed into it and just added looking “executive” or “powerful” or “totally competent” is part of the JD.

My secret is that I wear the same proportions and five or so colors everyday. I’m tall, so a high rise pant that shows my waist is good. I have about nine pairs. Jeans, trousers, actually a lot of “soft” pants from Cos that look chic. Then I pair it with a body suit or a high quality tee. Then I add a jacket. Go-to jackets include a white blazer w gold buttons from Veronica beard, a cropped camel wool number from sezane, or an oversized plaid blazer from Zara.

Shoes are often either a Gucci loafer (if you know you can tell, but there’s no logo on it), or a white platform sneaker, or a brown bootie from Dior (also no labels)

Then medium gold hoops, one or two chains, and friendship braclets from my daughters. I also ADORE a silk scarf and it’s a chic and underrated accessory. I have a handful of twillys from Hermes but also love a few of the impulse purchases for like $15 I’ve made on Amazon.

I’ll also throw on a bottega tote (no label) for the days I need to look really tight, but honestly normally running around w a company logo backpack from a retreat.

I just got back from a trip where I was surrounded by the millionaire girlies and the most killer accessory everyone had was sleeveless, high cut tops with absolutely ripped arms. So that would be fun to figure out how to get.

My monthly/yearly spread on my body feels insane right now for me but I do think it’s common….? Botox every four months, then once a year I do lasers or micro needling. I’m also probably spending $260 a week on a personal trainer and my yoga practice.

For context, I make about $800k a year, I’m one person removed from CEO at a 15,000 person company.

My energy is very bright and positive and confident at work. For better or worse, I believe at this level vibes are v important.

Anonymous wrote:Good bone structure and natural beauty (clear skin, even features) really help as you age.

Anonymous wrote:I think I’m one of these women, and I work in fintech surrounded by them, so I’ll share a few ways I got here—

First, I owned the fact that leveling up my look was part of my job once I got to the exec level. So I used to like really chase sales or put off Botox and although YMMV, once I just embraced that this is part of the deal in the dumb world we live in, I sort of relaxed into it and just added looking “executive” or “powerful” or “totally competent” is part of the JD.

My secret is that I wear the same proportions and five or so colors everyday. I’m tall, so a high rise pant that shows my waist is good. I have about nine pairs. Jeans, trousers, actually a lot of “soft” pants from Cos that look chic. Then I pair it with a body suit or a high quality tee. Then I add a jacket. Go-to jackets include a white blazer w gold buttons from Veronica beard, a cropped camel wool number from sezane, or an oversized plaid blazer from Zara.

Shoes are often either a Gucci loafer (if you know you can tell, but there’s no logo on it), or a white platform sneaker, or a brown bootie from Dior (also no labels)

Then medium gold hoops, one or two chains, and friendship braclets from my daughters. I also ADORE a silk scarf and it’s a chic and underrated accessory. I have a handful of twillys from Hermes but also love a few of the impulse purchases for like $15 I’ve made on Amazon.

I’ll also throw on a bottega tote (no label) for the days I need to look really tight, but honestly normally running around w a company logo backpack from a retreat.

I just got back from a trip where I was surrounded by the millionaire girlies and the most killer accessory everyone had was sleeveless, high cut tops with absolutely ripped arms. So that would be fun to figure out how to get.

My monthly/yearly spread on my body feels insane right now for me but I do think it’s common….? Botox every four months, then once a year I do lasers or micro needling. I’m also probably spending $260 a week on a personal trainer and my yoga practice.

For context, I make about $800k a year, I’m one person removed from CEO at a 15,000 person company.

My energy is very bright and positive and confident at work. For better or worse, I believe at this level vibes are v important.

Anonymous wrote:I have worked with women like this and one of the things I've noticed is that they tend to have distinctive and consistent personal style. Like there was a partner at my old law firm who wore her hair in in shoulder-length blunt cut with a center part, and always wore glasses with a dark red or maroon frame (she had a few different pairs, but they were always those colors -- very dark so it almost read as brown but enough color to be distinctive). The rest of her clothes were always high quality neutrals, usually in black, navy, or dark brown. She always had really high quality shoes, I coveted her shoe collection. But her clothes were never recognizable labels or even really distinctive pieces, just clearly high quality suiting separates, ribbed tees, cashmere sweaters, etc. She had one big diamond ring and the rest of her jewelry was subtle, and her makeup was tasteful and understated.

The effect was that you could spot her a mile away, she always looked pretty much the same, but very pulled together and professional. The haircut and glasses combo was kind of iconic, like if she wrote for the New Yorker, you know exactly what her little sketch portrait on her byline would look like.

And I think that was the key. She wasn't all over the place trying to follow trends. She'd found a couple things that worked for her and committed to them, and did the highest end, most polished version of them. She never experimented in the time I knew her, as far as I know she'd been dressing that way since law school.

I think it takes confidence and really knowing yourself to make that work, but it's very impactful.

Anonymous wrote:
A word about "normal" clothes: sometimes it takes a great eye for color, texture and proportions, to put together a casual outfit!

I dress much better now in my 40s than I did in previous decades, because I have finally understood what works with my figure. Took me a while... I agree with PP that it's about finding cuts of clothes that hit just right for where your curves hit, ie visual transition points. And then going with a color palette that pleases the eye.

Anonymous wrote:I have worked with women like this and one of the things I've noticed is that they tend to have distinctive and consistent personal style. Like there was a partner at my old law firm who wore her hair in in shoulder-length blunt cut with a center part, and always wore glasses with a dark red or maroon frame (she had a few different pairs, but they were always those colors -- very dark so it almost read as brown but enough color to be distinctive). The rest of her clothes were always high quality neutrals, usually in black, navy, or dark brown. She always had really high quality shoes, I coveted her shoe collection. But her clothes were never recognizable labels or even really distinctive pieces, just clearly high quality suiting separates, ribbed tees, cashmere sweaters, etc. She had one big diamond ring and the rest of her jewelry was subtle, and her makeup was tasteful and understated.

The effect was that you could spot her a mile away, she always looked pretty much the same, but very pulled together and professional. The haircut and glasses combo was kind of iconic, like if she wrote for the New Yorker, you know exactly what her little sketch portrait on her byline would look like.

And I think that was the key. She wasn't all over the place trying to follow trends. She'd found a couple things that worked for her and committed to them, and did the highest end, most polished version of them. She never experimented in the time I knew her, as far as I know she'd been dressing that way since law school.

I think it takes confidence and really knowing yourself to make that work, but it's very impactful.

Anonymous wrote:
A word about "normal" clothes: sometimes it takes a great eye for color, texture and proportions, to put together a casual outfit!

I dress much better now in my 40s than I did in previous decades, because I have finally understood what works with my figure. Took me a while... I agree with PP that it's about finding cuts of clothes that hit just right for where your curves hit, ie visual transition points. And then going with a color palette that pleases the eye.

Anonymous wrote:I am 61 and about 5 years ago I upped my skin care routine. It really had been just a gentle cleanser and moisturizer/SPF. I did a lot of research and now have a multi step routine. My skin looks so much better which makes me feel better and more confident (I wish I had started it earlier).