Anonymous wrote:I feel like waiting is often something people do for attention. Given that it's so easy to know these days it feels like made up drama.

We found out and sent pink or blue flowers to the grandparents and great grandparent. They were super surprised and each called us to celebrate. It was very fun to share with them, even if long distance. We didn't do a gender reveal. If I had older kids, I'd probably do something special just with them, like pink or blue filled cupcakes after dinner.

Ummmm. . .

Didn't find out for either, loved not knowing for either. With my first, about 7 years ago, I would get occasional (not constant) comments from sonogram techs that it was "exciting" that we didn't want to know. By my last pregnancy last year, it seemed much more uninteresting to my providers (although the nurse at L&D was effusive, but that may have been to distract me or remind herself).

I could see finding out if you want to get your kids excited or you just want a party but don't want to throw a baby shower for a fourth kid, though.

Team not on a team because get a life

We didn't find out for our first two, no regrets. In fact, I think that's better because when you have months and months of ONLY knowing a child's sex and nothing else about them, you (and certainly old relatives!) will subconsciously start creating a subtle narrative in your head about what they'll be like based on gender. Plus, then people buy you genders-specific stuff, which is impractical if you're having multiple kids, and I prefer the gender-neutral stuff anyway. I know someone who announced they were having a girl and then got like 15 useless frilly pink dresses at their shower and very little from their registry.

The third we did find out for purely practical reasons. The older kids, one boy and one girl, were growing out of clothes and I didn't want to save both sets of clothes. That also was fine - way less excitement around #3 from others anyway.

I also had a 4th at 40ish with older kids. We didn’t tell them about the baby until after NIPT was clear and we told them then it was a brother. I had really debated being Team Green (we’d found out with the other 3, and have both genders already), but practical considerations (we had a pink nursery we needed to paint) won out. In the end, though, I’m glad that the kids knew what we were having - it made it easier for all of us to envision our family with the baby and also let any kid gender disappointment work its way out before the baby arrived.

I'm not sure why you finding out the sex of your child means you have to have a gender reveal party. Why can't you jut find out the sex of your baby and go on with your life like a normal person?

Gender reveals are incredibly tacky. Nobody cares about the sex of the baby except for you and maybe the grandparents.

I'm "team" whatever makes that tacky trend go away. Resist.

Anonymous wrote:My surprise C-section was enough of a surprise on the day of the birth. I found out during the ultrasound like most well-adjusted parents.

Similar, except both my babies came out blue and limp, were immediately being treated by a full team, and then wisked away to the NICU. All I cared about at that moment was them being okay. It wasn't the moment to learn the gender.

My surprise C-section was enough of a surprise on the day of the birth. I found out during the ultrasound like most well-adjusted parents.

Anonymous wrote:There is a very specific subset of people who do gender reveals and it's not a type of person you want to be.

This x1000

Anonymous wrote:Op here. Thanks PPs! It’s been a little over 15 years since my last child so I’m stating to look into what is now used and what is banned or discontinued (the Graco Rock n’ Play was a lifesaver all those years ago sad to see it go)

I had my first at 24 and most of my friends have just started having babies in their now late 30s. I’ll be 40 when this baby arrives.

I have no baby items and the grandparents who are living are elderly.

My kids are teens so it’s not little kids needing to get excited but older kids - I have two boys and a girl - wanting to be involved.

You can just throw a "we're having a baby party." It doesn't have to be a gender reveal or a shower, but just a celebration.

If you want presents, have a shower.

If you want to do a gender reveal, just do it with your teens and don't post it on the internet.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4th child but it’s been over 15 years and things had changed. This is a high risk pregnancy so multiple appointments where I’d have to explain that I am team green or whatever the current term is for waiting to find out.

Friends have all had gender reveals which were actually a pretty fun party.

I’m not sure which I would prefer. I’ve come across a video of having older children reveal the gener but there also seems to be some excitement to be had with finding out at delivery.

What do you regret?

I don’t understand this way of thinking at all.

Our “gender reveal” was the doctor told us at the amniocentesis and then we made a couple of phone calls.

Parties? “Team Green?” Like WTAF?

+ Doctor told us at the nipt.

Anonymous wrote:4th child but it’s been over 15 years and things had changed. This is a high risk pregnancy so multiple appointments where I’d have to explain that I am team green or whatever the current term is for waiting to find out.

Friends have all had gender reveals which were actually a pretty fun party.

I’m not sure which I would prefer. I’ve come across a video of having older children reveal the gener but there also seems to be some excitement to be had with finding out at delivery.

What do you regret?

I don’t understand this way of thinking at all.

Our “gender reveal” was the doctor told us at the amniocentesis and then we made a couple of phone calls.

Parties? “Team Green?” Like WTAF?

Op here. Thanks PPs! It’s been a little over 15 years since my last child so I’m stating to look into what is now used and what is banned or discontinued (the Graco Rock n’ Play was a lifesaver all those years ago sad to see it go)

I had my first at 24 and most of my friends have just started having babies in their now late 30s. I’ll be 40 when this baby arrives.

I have no baby items and the grandparents who are living are elderly.

My kids are teens so it’s not little kids needing to get excited but older kids - I have two boys and a girl - wanting to be involved.