Anonymous wrote:Job training, unless you're rich enough to not need it for job training.

Honestly this is what I think. If you have enough money, it can be for learning. But for those who don’t have significant financial resources to pay for it and the extra years of support, it’s for training. And even those who get To go for training are privileged. For many the resources don’t even exist to do that much.

In OP’s case, unless there are grandparents paying the bill or they have significant college savings and someone willing to pay their child’s bills well into their late 20s, their kids need to be looking at schools as a path toward a career. I guess there is one other option and that is OP taking on significant debt so her kids can learn for the sake of learning.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your kid has no generational wealth. Maybe even opposite generational wealth given your low HHI.

Obviously college is for job training. Even if your kid ends up going to Harvard.

80k is low?

80k is not low, it is a little above average overall. In DC, NY, Boston, and most of CA it is quite low, but there are so many more places than that. Plenty of families of 4 live quite well (own a house, kids go to above av public schools, they can save for retirement) on 80k in many areas of NC, SC, AL, OR, IL, OH and most other states. Most of VA is livable for 4 on 80k too just not Nova or Cville. DCUM has no perspective on how average america lives. I had the benefit of moving a lot and grew up all over and have a large extended family all over the US.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your kid has no generational wealth. Maybe even opposite generational wealth given your low HHI.

Obviously college is for job training. Even if your kid ends up going to Harvard.

80k is low?

For an entire household that’s sending a kid to college? Yes, when paired with low assets. (No if it’s annual income from a trust fund …. )

Emory just set their tuition-free bar at $200k, by the way. Not sure how that’s going to work out for them exactly, but it’s worth a look: https://news.emory.edu/features/2025/09/er_emory_advantage_plus_17-09-2025/index.html

As the first 2nd tier college to do it, Emory stands out. Four elite colleges Princeton, Penn, MIT, Harvard already have it. The rest of the T10 is going to have to follow suit or lose out in the fight for the top need-based aid kids.
OP your kid will pay close to 0 at these schools and will get learning and enough training to go on to any possible career.
Aim high if your kid has top stats/rigor.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s a bad idea to major in something you aren’t that passionate about just because that’s where the jobs seem to be at.
Look what happened to CS! A lot can change in 4 years, so make sure your kid gets a well rounded education and learns how to learn, not just learn specific skills.

Agree with PP that avoiding loans is of the utmost importance. There are no guarantees of any degree “paying off” in specific monetary terms and everyone needs to understand that going in.

There is value in going to college even if you end up working in a completely different field than you majored in, as long as you stay away from debt.

We will be paying a lot for DS to attend a SLAC. I am fully prepared for the possibility that he may not end up with a traditional white collar job, and I am OK with that.

This might be ok for you since you're wealthy and can afford to help your kid financially. OP is not in that position. OP's kid absolutely NEEDS to get a traditional white collar job or go to med/law school after college.

It’s not because I’m wealthy.
Good white collar jobs are becoming scarce. This is about being realistic. There are really no guarantees anymore.

But also, people need to not panic if your child’s dream job is not immediately there for them after graduation.

I am in my mid 40s and have a “good white collar job” that allows a modest-ish comfortable life in NoVA. But it was not an even path out of college. I worked abroad for a few years after college, then did this and that, took some time off to have kids, then leaned into the career I currently have. I don’t have millions, but I have enough home equity and retirement savings (plus a pension) to be OK if I have to downshift in a few years and eventually retire.

I came from a family like OP’s, so unlike most of DCUM, for someone like us it isn’t the end of the world not to be able to afford McLean or Langley pyramids, endless ECs and tutors for our kids, regular international vacations, or enough millions in our retirement accounts to afford 15 years of memory care. Not all of us love the striver lifestyle.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your kid has no generational wealth. Maybe even opposite generational wealth given your low HHI.

Obviously college is for job training. Even if your kid ends up going to Harvard.

80k is low?

For an entire household that’s sending a kid to college? Yes, when paired with low assets. (No if it’s annual income from a trust fund …. )

Emory just set their tuition-free bar at $200k, by the way. Not sure how that’s going to work out for them exactly, but it’s worth a look: https://news.emory.edu/features/2025/09/er_emory_advantage_plus_17-09-2025/index.html

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s a bad idea to major in something you aren’t that passionate about just because that’s where the jobs seem to be at.
Look what happened to CS! A lot can change in 4 years, so make sure your kid gets a well rounded education and learns how to learn, not just learn specific skills.

Agree with PP that avoiding loans is of the utmost importance. There are no guarantees of any degree “paying off” in specific monetary terms and everyone needs to understand that going in.

There is value in going to college even if you end up working in a completely different field than you majored in, as long as you stay away from debt.

We will be paying a lot for DS to attend a SLAC. I am fully prepared for the possibility that he may not end up with a traditional white collar job, and I am OK with that.

This might be ok for you since you're wealthy and can afford to help your kid financially. OP is not in that position. OP's kid absolutely NEEDS to get a traditional white collar job or go to med/law school after college.

That’s a bit extreme. No one NEEDS to become a doctor or lawyer particularly if they are not suited for it and taking on hundreds of thousands of dollars for it is a risk. There are plenty of other paths in life. One does not have to be in top % for income to be happy.

Law school can be a particularly bad deal for those who aren’t suited for a law career. Unfortunately all but the top law schools become money generating apparatuses for their institutions and don’t really weed out the ones who aren’t likely to be successful in a law career.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your kid has no generational wealth. Maybe even opposite generational wealth given your low HHI.

Obviously college is for job training. Even if your kid ends up going to Harvard.

80k is low?

DP. It is low, and would be very hard for a family to live on unless they live in an extremely low COL area or own a house outright. Hard to do in areas people actually want to live.

Anonymous wrote:Sorry. Lots of typos above. This is what I meant to say about avoiding loans:

Finally, if I were in your position, OP, my number one priority would be to ABOID taking out loans for college. More than anything else, loans would create tremendous pressure and limit the possibilities for you, your DH, and your child over time. So right now I’d focus not on choosing a specific career path, but on finding my kid a free ride to college. Not just tuition - the entire cost. (Your child will likely be considered a “first generation” college student because neither parent has a four year degree. Depending on your child’s grades and scores, this could help a lot on the “free rides” front.)

Aboid?? Que paso?

It depends on your social class, OP. For a FGLI kid with an immigrant parent, college is all about social mobility. That also means college is for job training.

Anonymous wrote:Your kid has no generational wealth. Maybe even opposite generational wealth given your low HHI.

Obviously college is for job training. Even if your kid ends up going to Harvard.

80k is low?

If the opportunity of learning for learnings sake is available, the do it. If the cost of doing so is prohibitive (taking out student loans that will be a burden for decades), don't.

Anonymous wrote:It’s a bad idea to major in something you aren’t that passionate about just because that’s where the jobs seem to be at.
Look what happened to CS! A lot can change in 4 years, so make sure your kid gets a well rounded education and learns how to learn, not just learn specific skills.

Agree with PP that avoiding loans is of the utmost importance. There are no guarantees of any degree “paying off” in specific monetary terms and everyone needs to understand that going in.

There is value in going to college even if you end up working in a completely different field than you majored in, as long as you stay away from debt.

We will be paying a lot for DS to attend a SLAC. I am fully prepared for the possibility that he may not end up with a traditional white collar job, and I am OK with that.

This might be ok for you since you're wealthy and can afford to help your kid financially. OP is not in that position. OP's kid absolutely NEEDS to get a traditional white collar job or go to med/law school after college.

Your kid has no generational wealth. Maybe even opposite generational wealth given your low HHI.

Obviously college is for job training. Even if your kid ends up going to Harvard.

There are many applied majors out there besides accounting & engineering. What does your kid excel at? The BLS Occupational Handbook is handy; it gives job outlook & salary info & edu requirements

As others have pointed out, with a HHI of 80k, if your kid has high stats, it’s very possible a private school could be cheaper than GMU & living at home. Run the NPC for schools before you take them off the table. Definitely have a budget & stick to it, but it’s possible you may have more options than you think.

Anonymous wrote:It’s a bad idea to major in something you aren’t that passionate about just because that’s where the jobs seem to be at.
Look what happened to CS! A lot can change in 4 years, so make sure your kid gets a well rounded education and learns how to learn, not just learn specific skills.

Agree with PP that avoiding loans is of the utmost importance. There are no guarantees of any degree “paying off” in specific monetary terms and everyone needs to understand that going in.

There is value in going to college even if you end up working in a completely different field than you majored in, as long as you stay away from debt.

We will be paying a lot for DS to attend a SLAC. I am fully prepared for the possibility that he may not end up with a traditional white collar job, and I am OK with that.

"CS" is just evolving not going way. As with most as areas, you have to evolve to stay current and relevant. Calm down to those folks crying about "CS."