I’ve done this at various points and my kids were little then. Probably for 2 years total and as a fed. I’d do it. The flight is a breeze. Book jet blue a month out and use T and Metro. Travel won’t cost much. Housing is more but workable.

It will be a stressful 1.5 years but it is certainly doable. My husband and I did something similar for 2+ years and I had to manage 3 kids at home by myself (HS and MS). It was brutal but I believe it was worth it at the end. We are all doing well now.

Anonymous wrote:If your kid is so high needs that pulling them out of school is an absolute no-go, how upset will they be to not see you M-W or W-F? You say goodnight Sunday night and then eat dinner together Wednesday- how thrown off will they be from that?

She’s 17 and half the time REALLY wants me to leave her alone. It’ll probably be good for both of us actually.

Anonymous wrote:OP, anything that gets you back to the Hub of the universe is worth enduring - it's only a year and a half of long distance marriage and commute, after all.

Consider looking for a house share, maybe with some nerdy graduate or law students from Harvard or MIT etc. - you will be working long hours anyway and that will save you outfitting and furnishing a whole little apartment for such a short time. You can rent a nice big hotel room when the hubs and kids come to Beantown to visit you.

Welcome home to the best commonwealth in the nation!

The "Hub of the Universe?" LOL

If your kid is so high needs that pulling them out of school is an absolute no-go, how upset will they be to not see you M-W or W-F? You say goodnight Sunday night and then eat dinner together Wednesday- how thrown off will they be from that?

What type of support will the high school student need after graduating? Will you be able to find it in the Boston area? Will losing in state at a community college matter? It sounds like you want to be in Boston, so I’d probably still do this.

OP, anything that gets you back to the Hub of the universe is worth enduring - it's only a year and a half of long distance marriage and commute, after all.

Consider looking for a house share, maybe with some nerdy graduate or law students from Harvard or MIT etc. - you will be working long hours anyway and that will save you outfitting and furnishing a whole little apartment for such a short time. You can rent a nice big hotel room when the hubs and kids come to Beantown to visit you.

Welcome home to the best commonwealth in the nation!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your partner can handle being alone with your child and is also on board with the permanent move, go.

Jr and Sr year are intense. Is DH prepared to be there for HW, college apps, etc? DC might have extracurriculars and a job?

Gen Alpha babies, hiring managers beware.

Yes, have the family come up to visit during school holiday / summer breaks. You will be fine!

I would do it. Sounds great and works towards your long-term plans. With technology you can see each other often.

Yeah this seems doable from your description. Maybe your SPED child could find a good school in Boston? If not, 1.5y isn't very long.

Yes I’d do it. I’d plan to relocate to BOS after senior year for your special ed child.

Choosing to do what you describe is what separates people who survive a recession relatively unscathed.

The job market in the DC area is abysmal and likely isn’t improving anytime soon. I’d GTFO.

DP. Regular video calls could be a solution.

When I put my college student's Facetime up on the TV and we're sitting on the living room couches, it feels nearly like he's at home.

My spouse and I were long distance from Boston to DC when we were just out of college and it worked okay, however I just question spending this much time away from your kid when they're about to graduate. My Dad spent much of a year away from us due to a job shift when I was a younger teen and it was really tough. Just not being there for the day to day really is a lot.

So really think about the impact on your kids and spouse taking on all the home/kid stuff and what you will be missing. I'm not saying don't do it, but really weigh this.

Op again. Good insights everyone. So my HS kid has no homework and is not on a “traditional” trajectory. So I get the “jr and sr year are intense” thing because we went though that with our older one (sports, homecoming, prom, graduation, parties, college apps, extracurriculars, SATs). None of that will be happening for younger one. We will casually look at schools this spring and maybe it’ll be community college for a while, maybe a supportive 4 year. But there’s none of the intensity.

DH and kids would probably come to Boston at least every two months because we visit family frequently anyway.

My biggest worry is the stress on me of going back and forth all the time, and the stress on our marriage. I’ll miss my husband a lot. It would also need to financially make sense because yes, rent in Boston is high. I couldn’t stay with family as they don’t have the room and aren’t close enough to downtown Boston.