As others have said, this is a LOT of transitions in a short span of time — that he didn’t choose. His whole world has just changed, at home and at daycare. He’s lost the kids that were his peer group and adults that he trusted with his well-being. Even the food he’s eating has changed — unless you’re sending food from home. Unless you have specific concerns, I’d give it a minimum of 2-3 months — assuming that the feedback you’re getting and seeing is reasonable.

You mention that he’s the oldest in his group. What was it like before in his previous daycare? Who did he spend time with? If he’s used to spending much of his time with older kids, maybe explore ways to increase these types of interactions in his current setting.

To do an adult parallel, if you got suddenly evicted from your home, lost your job — and lost all of the routines and relationships associated with that job, probably forever, it would take a while to adjust to all of that, even if the new home, jobs, and peers — not of your choosing— were very nice. Maybe talk and play with him, and read stories that address similar concerns, to see if you can help him to identify and articulate what these changes might mean to him.
Maybe build a school/or daycare together, or use a doll house for play activities. What and who would he like to see there? What might he Not want to see, or want to change?

New house. New daycare. That is a lot of change for a little kid. What other changes are in your routine? Are you waking up earlier? Is the commute longer?

He may need more time to adjust. Give it more time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What’s the daycare’s take? Does he cheer up quickly after you leave or seem unhappy during the day? What’s your gut feeling about the care?

Daycare says he stops crying as soon as we leave and cheers up. He looks content in photos they send but he’s not eating much. I think the staff seem very warm and caring and the facilities are lovely, but I’m concerned there’s just not enough other kids and he’s not being stimulated (3 other kids in his class, and he’s the oldest by around 6 months).

He is two. He doesn't need more kids but he probably does need more time. Sounds like there have been lots of changes so give him a few months to adjust.

Time

Anonymous wrote:He sounds stressed by change. He also moved houses.

I don't think 3 weeks is enough to know.

This. New house, new daycare and none of the familiar faces he knows well. He's wondering what happened. Give him tome.

This is the age when many kids go through a period of not wanting to go. My kid was a terror at drop off at around this age and it was the place he’d been going since he was six months old. I would leave a peek through the window five minutes later and he was find and wouldn’t necessarily want to come home at the end of the day. You have the added stress of new house, new school. Give it more time.

Going to a new daycare is a big change. Moving very far away as you did is yet another big change. It will take time for your child to transition and settle in. We moved my son from his preschool to a daycare when we finished up with his nanny. losing his nanny and changing the schools were two big changes at once. It took him about two months to get settled in. Give it more time. Your child will likely adjust.

Something similar happened with my three year old. It took a good 4-5 weeks and now he likes his new school.

It’s the change. Don’t change again. At least not right away.