Anonymous
08/14/2025 17:07
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
Also leave ADHD or anything else completely out of this. Deal with the reality of the situation. Don't speculate on why or how.
Anonymous
08/14/2025 17:06
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
To counter the above, email is good because it leaves a trail of all the times you gave correct information that was misread.
But I do agree that you shouldn't be too nice. If he is being direct to the point of being testy or aggressive, then you should likewise be direct and to the point. Don't bother being flowery.
OP, if you're not willing to go to his manager, then you have to deal with it yourself. Stop spoon feeding him. Just give him the instructions and leave it to him to either complete the task or not. If he complains that you are not helping, then you can show the email chains where you pointed him in the right direction.
But I do agree that you shouldn't be too nice. If he is being direct to the point of being testy or aggressive, then you should likewise be direct and to the point. Don't bother being flowery.
OP, if you're not willing to go to his manager, then you have to deal with it yourself. Stop spoon feeding him. Just give him the instructions and leave it to him to either complete the task or not. If he complains that you are not helping, then you can show the email chains where you pointed him in the right direction.
Anonymous
08/14/2025 16:05
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
Call instead of email
Only ask one question at a time and make it a very clear question. Minimize ambiguity.
Don't be too nice, he might not understand your question through all the fluff.
Give him time to prepare when possible
Only ask one question at a time and make it a very clear question. Minimize ambiguity.
Don't be too nice, he might not understand your question through all the fluff.
Give him time to prepare when possible
Anonymous
08/13/2025 21:39
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Just sounds like you don't like him, what's ADHD got to do with it?
+1. I have adhd and I hate these threads that associate adhd with just being a jerk. I don’t know if he has adhd. I don’t know if that contributes to him being a jerk. But your issue is that he’s a jerk, not that he has a medical condition.
A medical condition that OP is guessing at!!! (Unless he told you has this or you’ve diagnosed it)
Anonymous
08/13/2025 21:33
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Just sounds like you don't like him, what's ADHD got to do with it?
Not op but you have reading comprehension issues.
🤔
Anonymous
08/13/2025 21:18
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
Anonymous wrote:Just sounds like you don't like him, what's ADHD got to do with it?
Not op but you have reading comprehension issues.
Anonymous
08/13/2025 20:24
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:Just sounds like you don't like him, what's ADHD got to do with it?
+1. I have adhd and I hate these threads that associate adhd with just being a jerk. I don’t know if he has adhd. I don’t know if that contributes to him being a jerk. But your issue is that he’s a jerk, not that he has a medical condition.
Correct.
Op sounds judgey and like she has communications issues. Don’t project that onto this poor guy.
Anonymous
08/13/2025 20:20
Subject: How to deal with ADHD co worker who gets testy/aggressive at times?
Try calling him instead of emailing. I had a colleague like this who was also really passive aggressive and wrote incredibly snarky emails. He did much better in person or on the phone. Ultimately though I was thrilled when he retired.