Anonymous
Post 08/12/2025 10:02     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
It’s calculated as a percentage with the percentage decreasing as assets increase. Not more than 5% on the first like $50k (varies by state).

But you can just tell your mom that you will do it and then decline after her death.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 20:50     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
^good not golf but funny typo!
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 20:50     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
A goof law firm will have an attorney do the legal work and a paralegal do the admin portion of administering the estate so not all of the work will be performed at attorney rates.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 20:08     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
Anonymous wrote:It doesn't have to be hard if she makes her will very clear. The real issue is whether the $1.4m will be enough for her end-of-life care.


LOL yeah, could end up a vegetable for 10+ years!
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 19:57     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
Thanks everyone! Appreciate the support and things to consider.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 19:41     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
In OP's described situation, jus keep saying no.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 18:44     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
^ ok, pp again. Sorry, 10% is wrong. But it's something and it's not peanuts.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 18:42     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
Most states allow 10% of the value of the estate to paid to The Executor as a fee for their service --- some relative will take the job!
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 18:40     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
If she names you, after she passes, just decline. And it is not your responsibility to find someone to appoint.

The court will
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 18:09     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
OP, if she appoints you, you can always resign. Maybe say yes on the condition that the document allows you to appoint your replacement.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 17:59     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
Even if (unknown to you) you were named as Executor -- you can decline. Say she has passed. You find out you are named as Executor. You tell the court that you "decline."

The court appoints someone else.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 17:46     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Why not call or email a bunch of law offices and ask for an estimate for executing a will? It's a way of helping that does not involve your siblings.

I also find it hard to believe she can't afford it. Sounds like a knee jerk reaction to not getting her way with you.

But no matter what keep your foot down. It sounds like the sibling fruit didn't fall far from the mom tree.


Yeah, I suppose I should hit my lawyer up. I can feel myself weakening, but I really want to stay strong. I did all the work for my dad's care and I live on the opposite coast. My brother didn't see him for 5 years, and he's a two-hour car ride away. I've been taking care of everyone my entire life and I'm finally done.


Do not weaken. You are entitled to stop caring and stop sustaining them.
Anonymous
Post 08/11/2025 17:45     Subject: Cost of independent executor -- lawyer says mom can't afford it
its normal to have a family member named as the executor and then to have an estate/probate attorney help the executor. thr estate will pay the attorney.