Why on earth didn’t you sort this out beforehand? And what kind of camp was this?

The most important lesson to be learned here: teach your teen not to volunteer your services without checking with you first. This whole thing would have been avoided if you had kept with your original plan.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd let it go but next time, if there is next time, i'd make it clear what the arrangement is before

+100

Why wasn't this settled prior? Or even during the planning stages of the trip?

What is the context of the trip? Was it your kid's birthday so the parents figured this was your treat? Your way of celebrating and hosting?
Or were you going on this trip anyway so your kid just took along a few buddies ?

You never asked for money? Not even a "contributions appreciated to de-fray costs" type of a text/email/verbal with said parents?

My kid was signed up for a 2 day camp. Someone texted in a team chat “Is anyone going to X camp? How are you getting there?” And my kid replied that he was going and I was driving and then 2 other kids replied “Can I get a ride too?”

I got the contact info for the parents and reached out to the parents and introduced myself and gave a link to the hotel. Parents replied thank you. All other contact went through the kids.

Based on this, I think you can let the parents know their share of the cost for the hotel. I mean you did those parents a favor. This wasn’t a trip that you were inviting kids to join. It was a ride to camp. How rude that it wasn’t offered.

As for gas, I wouldn’t ask for money for that. You would have had to pay for it anyway.

I agree with the majority of the posters. Now, it would feel really weird to chase down people now and ask, “Hey, remember that fun trip your kid went on? That’ll be $102.50, thanks.”

What do you estimate are your additional costs? Don't count gas because that expense would've been the same. It sounds like kids brought money for food but some didn't have enough. Cash can be hard to estimate but I'm surprised they didn't have some electronic form of payment. You said one kid gave you money for the hotel. It sounds like you had your own room and 4 kids slept together in second room. Is that right? How much hotel money did the one kid give you for hotel and what was the cost of the second room?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you can follow up because you did send the link, but lesson learned for next time!

For this time, I’d say something like…” finally following up on lodging costs. The 2 nights came to 350 and Billy and Tommy shared so 175 each. I am happy that I was able to make this happen for them, and I enjoyed getting to know your boys!

That’s it. No food, no gas costs. If you took my dc I would absolutely expect to pay for the hotel ( and I’d pay for gas and food too) but for this scenario just get reimbursement for the hotel and move on.

+1 This is perfect

Agree plus 1. And if the one kid who paid actually paid for the whole room- I’d say- cost for the room is X and he paid it all so payment would go to that kid/family.

Were you out of pocket costs for the kid who didn’t pay or are you just hoping to get some money to cover gas and things you were spending anyway?

If it’s the former you should definitely send an email. If it’s the latter then the kid should have offered something but I don’t think you can bill them after the fact.

Anonymous wrote:I think you can follow up because you did send the link, but lesson learned for next time!

For this time, I’d say something like…” finally following up on lodging costs. The 2 nights came to 350 and Billy and Tommy shared so 175 each. I am happy that I was able to make this happen for them, and I enjoyed getting to know your boys!

That’s it. No food, no gas costs. If you took my dc I would absolutely expect to pay for the hotel ( and I’d pay for gas and food too) but for this scenario just get reimbursement for the hotel and move on.

+1 This is perfect

I think you can follow up because you did send the link, but lesson learned for next time!

For this time, I’d say something like…” finally following up on lodging costs. The 2 nights came to 350 and Billy and Tommy shared so 175 each. I am happy that I was able to make this happen for them, and I enjoyed getting to know your boys!

That’s it. No food, no gas costs. If you took my dc I would absolutely expect to pay for the hotel ( and I’d pay for gas and food too) but for this scenario just get reimbursement for the hotel and move on.

This sounds like a mess. Why didn’t you tell the parents the plan for the rooms and payment in advance? And have your kid tell the other kids too?

Anonymous wrote:Per your update: you drove 14 hrs round trip for a 2 day camp? And with no on-site housing so you had to pay for a hotel room for the duration of camp?

Yes

Lesson learned. Next time, send a quick text ahead of time to let parents know cost breakdown. Please Venmo me X if your kid is joining us. No drama, no assumptions, no lingering resentment.

How many people were there in total? It sounds like 5. How many rooms did you have and what were the sleeping arrangements?

Yes, you can ask for payment. They’re teens and probably didn’t even think about it. A quick and friendly email is all it will take. The other parents were rude not to thank you for driving and taking care of their kids overnight.

Per your update: you drove 14 hrs round trip for a 2 day camp? And with no on-site housing so you had to pay for a hotel room for the duration of camp?

Anonymous wrote:Help me understand why you needed a hotel room for the kids? Didn’t you drop off the kids and get a room for you before you drove home?

Camp was a 7 hour drive with an 8 a.m. arrival time, and no overnight option between day 1 and day 2. So we stayed in a hotel before day 1 and between day 1 and day 2.

Based on the update above I think it’s reasonable to send a message to the parents of the boys who didn’t pay telling them the cost of the hotel room and asking them to pay. You can be polite about it as if they should be expecting this information from you and will pay promptly. If they don’t, I guess just let it go.