My oldest graduated an elite BS this year. My youngest loves his local public school. They are 2 vastly different kids. Public school and the local private schools wouldn't give my oldest the experience she wanted. Boarding schools and private would be a disaster for my son.

However, when my kids were young, I would never have known this. Both kids started in private and then found their own paths based on their personalities and interests.

Getting into an elite boarding school is no different than getting into an elite DC prep. There are a limited number of seats and more people competing for them than available. Just like college---legacy, athletics, or URM helps.

Getting a DC into a top boarding school is hard. It helps if the applicant is a legacy, a great athlete or a URM. Sometimes being brilliant and outstanding at another extracurricular such as music will be enough to open the door.

Another recc to go to the college confidential board for boarding school info. It’s a very respectful community that is both highly moderated for abuse and doesn’t allow anonymous posting, which leads to much more respectful conversations. It’s also a mix of kids and adults, so people mind their manners more. This board is just straight odd when it comes to boarding school.

I was a day student at a mostly boarding school.

Some of the boarders came from families where boarding schools were a tradition. They never considered anything else and saw these schools as a path to the same colleges they attended.

BUT, there were also three other large groups. These were:

Kids from areas where the public schools were awful.

Kids who had had significant problems —- behavioral and/or academic—- in their public or other private schools.

Kids from unsettled or dysfunctional family situations in which the parents were unprepared or unwilling to have kids around during the school year.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Talk to boarding school alumni to see if they would send their own kids to board.

In my experience, the majority would not.

If the school is predominantly boarding students, what kind of experience would a day student have?

From what I understand, it would not be good. Always missing out on stuff and seen as an outsider.

Not true in my experience. At all. All boarding school parents I have met send their kids to boarding school.

All of them? Sounds like you only know alumni with kids currently at boarding school.

The overwhelming majority would not do this to their kids.

^ and OP said the school they are considering is primarily boarding.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being a day student at a boarding school is not great.

Depends on the balance. My child is getting a great experience as a day student at a boarding school. Mix is 50/50, which helps, and plays a sport which helps also.

OP, at least at my kid's school, boarding is said to be an easier admit than day.

This sounds like Madeira.

As you note, it depends on the balance. Many boarding schools have a much higher percentage of boarders vs day students (when they have day students at all).

Anonymous wrote:Talk to boarding school alumni to see if they would send their own kids to board.

In my experience, the majority would not.

If the school is predominantly boarding students, what kind of experience would a day student have?

From what I understand, it would not be good. Always missing out on stuff and seen as an outsider.

Not true in my experience. At all. All boarding school parents I have met send their kids to boarding school.

Anonymous wrote:op here - thanks for the tips. ideally they will live with us. i just thought that because the majority of students board, it may be helpful to start to learn some of the boarding school angles. and appreciate the poster who shared the other sub as well. thank you!

I’m a boarding school parent. A handful are super competitive. The rest are not. I think the vast majority give kids a really unique, enriching, educational experience that better prepares them for college. My best advice is to NOT send them there as day students. There is a huge day/boarding divide socially. Some kids overcome it. Some do not. Look into school with a high percentage boarding and just go for it. It’s transformative.

Anonymous wrote:Being a day student at a boarding school is not great.

Depends on the balance. My child is getting a great experience as a day student at a boarding school. Mix is 50/50, which helps, and plays a sport which helps also.

OP, at least at my kid's school, boarding is said to be an easier admit than day.