Nothing she can change so why bother to dwell on it?

Anonymous wrote:Volleyball is a great confidence booster for tall girls

I was hesitant to give this advice because it does not need more competition but it’s so true. My daughter is short and has been training hard for years. She sees tall girls come in every year with no experience and get picked up at tryouts over her and others.

Besides that, the sport is a lot of fun and a great community if you don’t take it too seriously. Your daughter’s will be surrounded by very tall people.

Anonymous wrote:OP how much time per day is she spending on social media? What platforms? Does she (or do you) track this on her devices?

At age 17, she should be moving towards self-regulation, to be ready for moving away to college. But without self-awareness about how she's being influenced, she can't start down this road.

I am a size outlier and based on my experience, I think your DD has a valid point about how not all clothing works for her. But until you get a handle on her social media, you'll be fighting an uphill battle.

This. The social media influence on self esteem is documented by research and should be your main focus.

5’11 here - make sure she works on her posture. Sports are important for girls to build confidence. It’s great being tall, I feel less vulnerable than some of my shorter friends and do more things as a result like backpack Europe by myself (and make friends in hostels). I think it helped having a tall mom who embraced her height and acted like a warrior woman - so maybe some mentor figures whether they are known or positive influencers/celebrities. Around boys it can be tough, I did feel more masculine as a result of my height so being thin helped (no eating disorder or anything, just genetics) and I’d argue dating is harder because the pool of men your height or taller are much smaller and I never could get over being taller than my partner despite trying (lots of men really are intimidated by tall women).

Also yoga helped me have better posture and feel less gangly overall with better body awareness

Instead of convincing her about her height, I'd emphasize what a waste of time it is to wish things were different about something we can not change. Like wishing for a different eye color, or smaller feet. You can't stop the thought, but you shouldn't focus on entertaining it. You focus on accepting it and spending your time on more productive things. Does she want to waste her life wishing she was shorter? It will not change.

So. Help her start to focus on becoming who she wants, without changing her height. It is very hard. Teenage years are rough when you don't physically fit in. But life is long and the sooner she makes her peace with her height, the happier her long life will be.

Volleyball is a great confidence booster for tall girls

Anonymous wrote:I’m 5’4 , and my 17 year old daughter is 5’11- 6’1 depending on who’s measuring her . She used to love being tall until she started getting brainwashed by insecure teens , and social media .
My daughter watches harmful content of tall woman on social media, and internalizes it . You know how negativity is usually popular on social platforms on TikTok .
All the prom couples usually have huge height differences, and my daughter feels left out . She holds resentment against her height , and feels like it limits her sadly . She tells me a short guy makes her uncomfortable , and highlights her height even more .
My daughter is also into girlish kawaii styles , and feels like her height clashes with her outfits . I told her she can wear anything , and shouldn’t be defined by her height .
How can I make my daughter see the beauty in her height ?

Taylor Swift.

I’m not a psychologist, but I’d wager that she’s into kawaii almost as compensation for her height. It sounds like a very insecure thing - well I’m tall, but at least I can dress young/cute. I hope she grows out of that too.

I was tall growing up, but I feel like kids are getting taller and taller these days. I like the idea of using tall women/models around her own age. Gigi and Kendall are good ones, and make sure she sees them wearing heels too. Maybe you can look at some (appropriate) copy cat outfits, something that will show off her long legs or something.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Following. I have a 5’9” 14 year old who just got her period. My sister in law is a little over six feet. I think it’s very hard for dating but also very fashionable. That’s a positive thing about the present regime: they appreciate tall women.

I feel like it’s the opposite , the 90s- early 2000s loved tall woman . Nowadays men like short petite woman or short curvy woman .

I mean the folks running the country.

Right? Melania and Ivanka are unapologetically tall women.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Following. I have a 5’9” 14 year old who just got her period. My sister in law is a little over six feet. I think it’s very hard for dating but also very fashionable. That’s a positive thing about the present regime: they appreciate tall women.

I feel like it’s the opposite , the 90s- early 2000s loved tall woman . Nowadays men like short petite woman or short curvy woman .

In any of the days, men are not a monolith and there are people who like all kinds of shapes and sizes.

I am 5-11. In my 50s.

It can be hard as a teen. In high school, everyone just wants to fit in and look like everyone else. Being different is challenging.

As an adult, there aren't a whole lot of downsides. I got to college and started getting a lot of attention from guys. Depending on her build, it's really much easier to manage weight your whole life and look good in clothes. I think she will grow out of wanting to wear Japanese baby doll clothing.

As for advice, is she interested in sports? It's a huge advantage to be this height in many sports and then you're in a community with some other taller women and it's a very positive environment. I also think if you know tall women in real life, you could ask them to mentor her in some kind of way that isn't weird. Just being around tall women who are confident and look and feel great is a good thing. I had a lot of tall women in my family and it really helped.

Also following as my 7th grader (13YO) is already 5’9” and also has not started her period. I think it’s hard being the tallest girl and perhaps even harder to be taller than every boy in your grade.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Following. I’m 5’4” and my 14 year old is 5’7” and hasn’t had her period yet but hopefully soon. She is already starting to get anxious about this topic. She has “big” feet too.

5’7 is not tall , and by 14 most woman don’t grow lol .

Most growth happens when a girl’s period starts. PP’s DD is already 5 ft 7in (which is taller than average) and still does not have her period. So she will likely be very tall.

This is not true. A girl's growth spurt is most pronounced in the year or two before girls start menstruating.

OP how much time per day is she spending on social media? What platforms? Does she (or do you) track this on her devices?

At age 17, she should be moving towards self-regulation, to be ready for moving away to college. But without self-awareness about how she's being influenced, she can't start down this road.

I am a size outlier and based on my experience, I think your DD has a valid point about how not all clothing works for her. But until you get a handle on her social media, you'll be fighting an uphill battle.