The problem is that the preschool director/teacher is going to be biased toward you paying for a one to one because it makes it easier for the teacher and preschool.

The paid one to one aid is never going to say everything is amazing because he or she would soon be out of a job so they have a vested interest in describing any behavior they can find even if every other child in the preschool is doing the same thing.

None of the behaviors you list are that problematic in public K - without the aide he may refuse to switch activities, hit other kids if they get too close to him or have trouble sharing, and sometime forget to use the bathroom independently resulting in accidents (only #1). All of those things are kindergarten skills. A lot depends on the elementary school your child will be attending. If it is a higher poverty school there might be students who never attended preschool.

One of the top reasons a student is getting a one-to-one in K is elopement. If a student is running out of the classroom there has to be an extra adult to follow the student.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can get a 1:1 from day 1 IF you have the data to back it up. If you don’t have the data to support then you won’t get it. Your current side should be able to help you with this data, if they can’t then you need a better aide.

This. But if you wait until summer before k to start the IEP process you likely won’t get it. For people following this with younger kids, get an IEP evaluation as soon as child turns 3 (or some places allow you to start before turning 3)

Agree 100%. You really need a minimum of 12 months of solid data across multiple educational areas, 18-24 months is even better. This is why an excellent EIBI home program is worth its weight in gold. It just makes it easier to get what you need in an IEP. Particularly for the 3-5 year old IEP starting age. This is one of the biggest, and often overlooked, “perks” of early intervention.

Completely agree. You will go into K with a plan in place.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here -- without the aide he may refuse to switch activities, hit other kids if they get too close to him or have trouble sharing, and sometime forget to use the bathroom independently resulting in accidents (only #1). With accommodations like reminders, timers, breaks in the quiet corner, and a star chart for good behaviors, he's been doing a lot better. So I understand why they wouldn't start him with a 1-on-1. I was just worried about the comment that his behavior is normal and there will be other kids with those problems too. Seems like it will be a lot to deal with!

Your child's class will likely have kids who elope, bite, throw things, hit, kick, scream for long periods of time, etc, etc. There will be 1 teacher and likely no aide. This is typical kindergarten now. I'm a teacher (off on a sick day) and I don't know any teacher who doesn't have these behaviors in k-3.

Wow. Do you think this is a healthy environment for children that age?

No one does, but it’s where we are.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here -- without the aide he may refuse to switch activities, hit other kids if they get too close to him or have trouble sharing, and sometime forget to use the bathroom independently resulting in accidents (only #1). With accommodations like reminders, timers, breaks in the quiet corner, and a star chart for good behaviors, he's been doing a lot better. So I understand why they wouldn't start him with a 1-on-1. I was just worried about the comment that his behavior is normal and there will be other kids with those problems too. Seems like it will be a lot to deal with!

Your child's class will likely have kids who elope, bite, throw things, hit, kick, scream for long periods of time, etc, etc. There will be 1 teacher and likely no aide. This is typical kindergarten now. I'm a teacher (off on a sick day) and I don't know any teacher who doesn't have these behaviors in k-3.

Wow. Do you think this is a healthy environment for children that age?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can get a 1:1 from day 1 IF you have the data to back it up. If you don’t have the data to support then you won’t get it. Your current side should be able to help you with this data, if they can’t then you need a better aide.

This. But if you wait until summer before k to start the IEP process you likely won’t get it. For people following this with younger kids, get an IEP evaluation as soon as child turns 3 (or some places allow you to start before turning 3)

Agree 100%. You really need a minimum of 12 months of solid data across multiple educational areas, 18-24 months is even better. This is why an excellent EIBI home program is worth its weight in gold. It just makes it easier to get what you need in an IEP. Particularly for the 3-5 year old IEP starting age. This is one of the biggest, and often overlooked, “perks” of early intervention.

They are normal in some ways but it depends on degree. How hard is your child hitting other kids? Swatting at kids? Normal. Punching them or pushing them down? Not normal.
What happens if he doesn't transiton to another activity and the teacher gets upset? Will he melt down or just quietly keep going with that activity? What happens if the teacher needs to take the class to another room? Will he cooperate? If he can't follow directions to leave the classroom that's a red flag that he does need more support.

Lots of reasons: the preschools and parents aren't like you and preparing the kids for K, lack of classroom structure, etc.

Anonymous wrote:You can get a 1:1 from day 1 IF you have the data to back it up. If you don’t have the data to support then you won’t get it. Your current side should be able to help you with this data, if they can’t then you need a better aide.

This. But if you wait until summer before k to start the IEP process you likely won’t get it. For people following this with younger kids, get an IEP evaluation as soon as child turns 3 (or some places allow you to start before turning 3)

You can get a 1:1 from day 1 IF you have the data to back it up. If you don’t have the data to support then you won’t get it. Your current side should be able to help you with this data, if they can’t then you need a better aide.

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like behavior at their school is really terrible and they're trying to convince you that that's normal and fine!

Have to agree with this. Your child definitely needs an IEP and down the road may qualify for one of the smaller specialized programs. If keeping your child in their private school for kindergarten is an option I would seriously consider that.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here -- without the aide he may refuse to switch activities, hit other kids if they get too close to him or have trouble sharing, and sometime forget to use the bathroom independently resulting in accidents (only #1). With accommodations like reminders, timers, breaks in the quiet corner, and a star chart for good behaviors, he's been doing a lot better. So I understand why they wouldn't start him with a 1-on-1. I was just worried about the comment that his behavior is normal and there will be other kids with those problems too. Seems like it will be a lot to deal with!

Your child's class will likely have kids who elope, bite, throw things, hit, kick, scream for long periods of time, etc, etc. There will be 1 teacher and likely no aide. This is typical kindergarten now. I'm a teacher (off on a sick day) and I don't know any teacher who doesn't have these behaviors in k-3.

NP here. OP your challenge will be to wait it out. In MCPS, your child needs to fail in order for the school to be convinced that an IEP and special services are warranted due to a developmental or learning issue at play. At some schools, the prevailing wisdom is that most kids with family, social, behavioral, reading, or other challenges tend to catch up to their peers around 3rd grade. It might take a few years before they can be convinced that your child's issues aren't the same as Suzie who never went to preschool, or Johnny whose parents each work two jobs so they aren't around enough, or Jimmy who is just a normal hyperactive boy who will calm down like they all do as they start to grow up.

Anonymous wrote:OP here -- without the aide he may refuse to switch activities, hit other kids if they get too close to him or have trouble sharing, and sometime forget to use the bathroom independently resulting in accidents (only #1). With accommodations like reminders, timers, breaks in the quiet corner, and a star chart for good behaviors, he's been doing a lot better. So I understand why they wouldn't start him with a 1-on-1. I was just worried about the comment that his behavior is normal and there will be other kids with those problems too. Seems like it will be a lot to deal with!

Your child's class will likely have kids who elope, bite, throw things, hit, kick, scream for long periods of time, etc, etc. There will be 1 teacher and likely no aide. This is typical kindergarten now. I'm a teacher (off on a sick day) and I don't know any teacher who doesn't have these behaviors in k-3.

We went through something similar in K. Ended up getting a dedicated 1:1 for 1st after he spent much of K in the SPED office. Not going to lie to you, the paras in public school have no training and are generally useless. Try to get a strong IEP and a teacher who is actually kind and caring. Good luck!

Anonymous wrote:OP here -- without the aide he may refuse to switch activities, hit other kids if they get too close to him or have trouble sharing, and sometime forget to use the bathroom independently resulting in accidents (only #1). With accommodations like reminders, timers, breaks in the quiet corner, and a star chart for good behaviors, he's been doing a lot better. So I understand why they wouldn't start him with a 1-on-1. I was just worried about the comment that his behavior is normal and there will be other kids with those problems too. Seems like it will be a lot to deal with!

I think it might be that in the beginning he will be with kids who have never been in a classroom setting or any formal learning setting. It can take some time for those kids to get into the routine and rhythm of school.

Anonymous wrote:OP here -- without the aide he may refuse to switch activities, hit other kids if they get too close to him or have trouble sharing, and sometime forget to use the bathroom independently resulting in accidents (only #1). With accommodations like reminders, timers, breaks in the quiet corner, and a star chart for good behaviors, he's been doing a lot better. So I understand why they wouldn't start him with a 1-on-1. I was just worried about the comment that his behavior is normal and there will be other kids with those problems too. Seems like it will be a lot to deal with!

Oh it totally is a lot to deal with. And yes other kids have those problems, but either they adjust and outgrow it or they get an IEP as well. Because it's not unusual to have special needs, generally speaking.

Maybe the school was trying to reassure you that these needs are not that uncommon. And/or getting you mentally prepared for the first month of K being pretty messy in general.