I would talk to her not in the morning -whenever her best time of the day is. She doesn't have to be chipper and happy but she cannot be rude. Seems like some of her comments about yawning and your driving cross over into the rude category. Then if she does it again you say - that has crossed the line, you are being rude. I guess I'm lucky that when my teen gets crabby she just stops speaking and pouts.

NOT felt the need to punish her.

I have a child like this - she just turned 15. She's anxious with a little hyperactive ADHD. My older child has inattentive ADHD, and is the opposite: extremely polite and patient at all times. Same parenting!

I never get offended, but I just tell her to rein it in when I feel she's vituperated enough. And usually she does. If she doesn't, it means she's really hangry or tired or overwhelmed, and after she eats or sleeps, she calms down. Occasionally she goes so far that I demand an apology, and she always apologizes right on the spot.

Interestingly, she has friends who are a lot more excitable, and she's a calming influence on them, tells THEM to rein it in, etc. Is she copying me? Ha. But since I'm the calm matire adult, she feels she can be the annoying person, I guess.

So far it's been OK and I have felt the need to punish her.

OP - I burst out laughing because this is exactly how my 12 year old is. Down to the we have to leave at a certain time or I get yelled at. She also says I drive too slow and says I could have made the light - when it clearly turned red before I even got to it. I have threatened she takes the bus in the am bc me driving her is a privilege. I have taken away screens as well when she’s especially rude. I try to stay calm but it’s hard.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why 7:30? is she anxious/or has OCD?

The school doors open at 7:35 and it’s a five minute drive. She doesn’t want to be early to wait around, but doesn’t want to be late, either (doors are promptly locked at 7:45.) I don’t think it’s anxiety, I think she’s embarrassed for whatever reason if she has to stand outside the doors and wait.

That seems okay but if doors are locked at 7:45, she wouldn't be late if she came from after 7:35 but before 7:45.

Anonymous wrote:Why 7:30? is she anxious/or has OCD?

The school doors open at 7:35 and it’s a five minute drive. She doesn’t want to be early to wait around, but doesn’t want to be late, either (doors are promptly locked at 7:45.) I don’t think it’s anxiety, I think she’s embarrassed for whatever reason if she has to stand outside the doors and wait.

You can just say politely, if you have nothing nice to say then let's just listen to the radio and drive in silence. Something to make her aware of her morning tude and then move on. If it doesn't change then perhaps figure out a different way to get to school

Is like training a dog. Safely pull over when she has an outburst. Wait until she's calm and drive on

No punishment. Praise her punctuality and EF skills. Institute a silent car rule. Start slamming doors yourself. Turn on music. Car pool

Anonymous wrote:I'd burst out laughing and say something like, "you're so cute when you get all huffy."

Why would you purposely needle her when she’s already in a bad mood? That’s even more rude TBH

Anonymous wrote:Why 7:30? is she anxious/or has OCD?

I guess parent has ADHD and lashes out instead of being accountable for disciplined behavior.

What is the punishment for you forcing her to get early every weekday?

Show some common decency for the human child being forced into an institutionalized school system designed for your wage slave needs because our civilization is broken.

My 13 year old is not a morning person either. We had a talk about it after school because she comes home in the afternoon with a much better disposition. I told her I will not engage you in chit chat in the am, I accept that you are not a morning person and we can sit in silence for the ride to school, but you cannot be disrespectful or yell at anyone in this house because you’re grumpy in the am. She understood (again because we discussed it during a time when she is in a better mood) and it has gotten so much better.

Why 7:30? is she anxious/or has OCD?

Thanks so much for your helpful responses! I’m feeling so much better about the situation now.