Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 10:47     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
He sounds rapey. Sex should be about BOTH partners, not just for a man to get his rocks off. Presumably he has two working hands for the other days.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 10:24     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Get ready for him to cheat.


100%

My close friend lost interest in sex after baby #2. Her husband traveled a lot for work and was hooking up with randoms during those trips to satisfy his needs. Then it morphed into him lying about having work trips and taking PTO to meet with his APs. That's how he got caught.

We all warned her that she needed to see a doc or do some therapy to find out why she had zero sex drive b/c it would cause him to stray. She said we were crazy because he was such a perfect husband and dad.


Prob how things will go for OP.. Especially since her husband was upset after she shared what she did.. ugh.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 10:18     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Anonymous wrote:How old are your kids? I would just feel used honestly.


+1. Just another person demanding your body whether you like it or not.

I think 4x a week with little kids is probably well above average and more than reasonable.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 10:14     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Anonymous wrote:Get ready for him to cheat.


100%

My close friend lost interest in sex after baby #2. Her husband traveled a lot for work and was hooking up with randoms during those trips to satisfy his needs. Then it morphed into him lying about having work trips and taking PTO to meet with his APs. That's how he got caught.

We all warned her that she needed to see a doc or do some therapy to find out why she had zero sex drive b/c it would cause him to stray. She said we were crazy because he was such a perfect husband and dad.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 10:08     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
OP- How has your husband encouraged these efforts to have and continue to have frequent sex. Was it simply to agree that it’s in the best interest of the relationship?

I wish my wife was willing to have sex once a week.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 09:30     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
You guys are not that far apart and I would think you could compromise. He could also take care of himself and/or you could lend a helping "hand" so to speak on nights when you're not up to it. Other orfices are also an option if that's part of you guys' repetoire.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 09:05     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
How old are your kids? I would just feel used honestly.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 09:05     Subject: Re:I told DH I want less sex..
Just don't have sex with him. He'll do whatever he'll do, which is probably move on from you given his reaction. Just cut your losses.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 09:02     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Just sending support to OP. Very hard when you have little kids and it feels as though everyone wants a piece of you - to the point that there’s nothing left of you. I wonder if a long weekend away by yourself might help you feel as though you have more to give? This is, most likely, temporary but still very hard.
Best wishes.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 08:54     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Your DH is being selfish.


I agree. I’m sore and exhausted. He is happy with 1-2 times a day. I’m happy with 3-4 times a week. He doesn’t want anything less than 5 times a week.


You two are very close in expectations! Usually when people post about differing sex drives here they are a factor of ten apart. This is something that can’t be that hard to work out and it’s going to change with time and circumstances anyway. What will matter isn’t what you agree on right now, it’s how you work together to solve it.


It’s very hard to work out if he is an entitled baby.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 08:51     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Rodney Dangerfield said his wife cut him down to once per week. But he felt better after she cut two other guys out completely.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 08:37     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
I’m pretty blunt with my H and would tell him I’m seriously questioning this marriage if he wants me to have sex multiple times a week that causes me pain, and now I don’t want any so he better figure his s*** out.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 08:08     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Did you expect him to be happy about it?

What is unhappiness about it is negatively impacting relationship, he’s allowed to be unhappy.

Would you prefer he lie to you and say that’s great honey?
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 07:39     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Do you enjoy the sex? Or just have it to get it out of the way?
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2025 07:11     Subject: I told DH I want less sex..
Anonymous wrote:Get ready for him to cheat.

Nobody wants him long term. Cheaters are not there to please the AP. They just whip it out and it's all about them. He be right back to begging his wife or paying for it.