Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

Men.

This is exclusively a men problem. Women do not do this, at all, ever.

I’m a woman and left my baby in the car once and the garage once. (Different babies.). The car one luckily I was with my husband and he realized I had forgotten her. Honestly I think I forgot I had brought her — we were at my in laws and running an errand for my MIL. The garage I was so busy getting the other kids all buckled in I didn’t realize that I hadn’t put the baby carrier into the latching thing. I was most of the way where we were going and my 3 year old told me we didn’t have the baby in the car. I was like “she’s right behind me!” I really thought she was there.
I think men are somewhat more prone to it only because, as the Weingarten article points out, it happens most often when someone is doing something out of their usual routine — like mom usually does daycare drop off but dad is covering this one time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

I'm in this camp. I can't understand how you forget a kid, but I can 100% see my husband doing this (my kids are teens) if he was in charge of pick up/drop off. He has ADHD and gets very distracted.

Same situation here.

Constant worry after I divorced my XH and my youngest was a baby.

You had so little faith in yourself? You were so distraught over losing your husband you thought you’d leave your child in the car and forget?

It's pretty obvious she was worried about her husband forgetting about their infant, but you be your edgy self.

That’s just silly. Why would she think that? Maybe she has anxiety and needs drugs because that is not a normal thought process.

It’s not silly. She was married to the man, and knows his forgetful, sloppy ways. Go pick on someone else.

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

Men.

This is exclusively a men problem. Women do not do this, at all, ever.

Just to add, I believe there are now aftermarket alarms one can purchase to have this kind of 'kid in backseat' reminder, but one of the biggest problems with this issue is that people never think this could happen to THEM. Just like the folks who always comment that this could never happen to them, only to negligent parents. So those people don't buy the alarms, and if they have a newer vehicle with built in safety tech related to backseat occupants, they shut it off because it annoys them.

The neuroscience is pretty much indisputable for how this can happen and how very good, loving parents and guardians can actually forget a child is in the car.

Then there are cases like that doctor's husband out in Arizona who left his baby girl in the car intentionally so he could play video games and not have to be troubled with her, and those cases create a large obstacle for many people to realize that many cases are in fact entirely unintentional.

A very good documentary on this subject on Prime called Death of a Child; for any of you interested in hot car child deaths I cannot recommend it highly enough, it's a fair handling of the subject.

I purchased a '25 Toyota a few months ago and am loving all the incredible safety features. I don't have children or grandchildren, but I do have a little collie dog who goes to work with me every day and accompanies me on most errands and adventures.

During cooler months I will occasionally leave her sitting in the vehicle while I run into the drugstore or post office or whatever - windows open unless very cold/rainy out. The Toyota immediately tells me on screen in front of steering wheel to CHECK THE BACK SEAT when I've shut off the car. If I leave her in the car and walk away, the car beeps at me pretty insistently and repeatedly. The car then sends repeated messages to my cell phone telling me to check the back seat.

This is excellent tech and should be (maybe is?) mandatory on all new vehicles at this point. Folks with older vehicles need to put their handbag or wallet in the baby seat with the baby, or some other strategy that prevents them from forgetting a quiet child in the backseat.

Anonymous wrote:The Arizona dad who let his daughter die in the car while getting drunk and playing video games gets to go on vacation to Hawaii ahead of his trial. Nothing about this case makes sense in terms of how he’s been treated.
https://www.fox10phoenix.com/news/marana-hot-car-death-dad-charged-can-take-hawaiian-vacation-court-says

Was he drunk? I don't remember seeing that. I thought in his case it was a mix of commonly leaving the child in the car to nap until she woke up and distracted with video gaming and lost track of time.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

I'm in this camp. I can't understand how you forget a kid, but I can 100% see my husband doing this (my kids are teens) if he was in charge of pick up/drop off. He has ADHD and gets very distracted.

Same situation here.

Constant worry after I divorced my XH and my youngest was a baby.

You had so little faith in yourself? You were so distraught over losing your husband you thought you’d leave your child in the car and forget?

It's pretty obvious she was worried about her husband forgetting about their infant, but you be your edgy self.

That’s just silly. Why would she think that? Maybe she has anxiety and needs drugs because that is not a normal thought process.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

I'm in this camp. I can't understand how you forget a kid, but I can 100% see my husband doing this (my kids are teens) if he was in charge of pick up/drop off. He has ADHD and gets very distracted.

Same situation here.

Constant worry after I divorced my XH and my youngest was a baby.

You had so little faith in yourself? You were so distraught over losing your husband you thought you’d leave your child in the car and forget?

It's pretty obvious she was worried about her husband forgetting about their infant, but you be your edgy self.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

I'm in this camp. I can't understand how you forget a kid, but I can 100% see my husband doing this (my kids are teens) if he was in charge of pick up/drop off. He has ADHD and gets very distracted.

Same situation here.

Constant worry after I divorced my XH and my youngest was a baby.

You had so little faith in yourself? You were so distraught over losing your husband you thought you’d leave your child in the car and forget?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

It sounds to me like you have not read “Fatal Distraction.” It won Gene Weingarten a Pulitzer. Once you read it, you won’t forget it.

https://mitchellhamline.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/9/2012/01/Fatal-Distraction.pdf

+1
Yes. It could happen to you. That piece is so moving and should be required reading for everyone.

That piece sticks with you forever

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

It sounds to me like you have not read “Fatal Distraction.” It won Gene Weingarten a Pulitzer. Once you read it, you won’t forget it.

https://mitchellhamline.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/9/2012/01/Fatal-Distraction.pdf

+1
Yes. It could happen to you. That piece is so moving and should be required reading for everyone.

Anonymous wrote:Who goes home and forgets their kid in the car for several hours?

It sounds to me like you have not read “Fatal Distraction.” It won Gene Weingarten a Pulitzer. Once you read it, you won’t forget it.

https://mitchellhamline.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/9/2012/01/Fatal-Distraction.pdf

The Arizona dad who let his daughter die in the car while getting drunk and playing video games gets to go on vacation to Hawaii ahead of his trial. Nothing about this case makes sense in terms of how he’s been treated.
https://www.fox10phoenix.com/news/marana-hot-car-death-dad-charged-can-take-hawaiian-vacation-court-says

Why is it just a terrible mistake when parents do it but a crime when it’s a caregiver?

Agree with there but for the grace of god BUT I also think many people set up really hectic lives for themselves. No time to smell the roses or interact with the toddler in the backseat. Always go go go