It depends on where home is and where the lake house is.

We just sold our second home. I really feel like a vacation home is amazing when you have kids. It would have been great when my kids were younger. Keep in mind that the middle school, high school years are tough b/c of the activities at home, but that phase ends too.

I would get the second home. Buy something that you would like to retire to.

Anonymous wrote:We almost bought a house on the water in Annapolis when our first was little. Since it was only 35-40 minutes away, we could have gone all the time and we loved the idea of the kids having memories there together. Now they are 11, 9, and 6 and I'm really glad we didn't. We are already so busy on weekend with sports and other kid activities and the kids want to stay in town to do things with their friends and have sleepovers, etc. I know we would never really go to Annapolis. Even in the summer, there is summer swim team and then sleepaway camp. I think we will revisit the plan when our youngest is in high school and we will use it more as a step toward retirement.

+100

Once your kids get older, you will not have time. Just do Airbnb, don’t buy a vacation home. .

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't imagine the cost of a second vacation home is a good value after you include the cost of maintenance. Maybe back before the airbnb/wfh era you could get a good deal.

It may or may not be a good investment, but the enjoyment we have derived from our weekend home has been incredibly valuable to us.

Is it more enjoyable because you own it? We've gone back to the same lake house for the last 3 summers. We can't stay more than 2 weeks anymore because our kids play travel sports. We look at new homes every time we're there, but can't rationalize buying one when we can rent for less.

We did the "keep the small house in the city and buy a larger waterfront house" thing and it was great when our kids were small and my work situation allowed us to spend extended periods of time there. Then the kids were in real school and my work situation changed, and we couldn't spend as much time there. I did the math and realized that, for what we were spending per night on the second home, we could fly to Paris and stay at the Georges V. Then we rented a cabin for the weekend and when I dropped the key back into the lockbox and realized that the maintenance of the cottage was not my problem, that sealed the deal. We sold the second house, and bought a nicer home in the city and never looked back. Bottom line is that it depends on how much time you can spend in the second home, but for us, it just didn't make sense to spend our time in a small house and spend $$ on a very nice house that we rarely saw.

We live in DC and bought our beach house when DS was 1. Our beach house is more than twice as large as our DC house.

No regrets. It would be nice to have a little bigger home but the space is fine. Not tight. The beach house has been great for long weekend getaways and relaxing family time. We do rent it out when we don’t use it and it pays itself with mortgage and maintenance. Not to mention that it has almost doubled in price in 10 years.

Anonymous wrote:Can't imagine the cost of a second vacation home is a good value after you include the cost of maintenance. Maybe back before the airbnb/wfh era you could get a good deal.

It may or may not be a good investment, but the enjoyment we have derived from our weekend home has been incredibly valuable to us.

We went for a comfortable primary home that has few luxuries that our kids and we love, like a home gym, a sports court outside, two home offices, an oversized mudroom with lockers for gear, and a playroom. It's hard to know how much you will love those things until you have them. We've found a few homes, including one on a lake, that we return to every year when we rent, which is really nice. One of them even lets renters use all the club benefits, including the golf course, pool, and clubhouse. We've talked about buying a second home, but so far, it hasn't made sense.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Will you be going to the lake for all weekends and vacations? What happens if you want to see something else or have sports commitments? We have neighbors with vacation property and when their kids were little we never saw them as they were always there and didn't build as much community with their regular neighbors. Now kids are in sports and they don't go as often. It's all a time and money trade off. I wouldn't get vacation property as I don't want to be tied to one place. Eventhough we often do a week vacation at the same place but we rent it and don't have to worry about maintenance etc.

lol who cares about “building community with their regular neighbors?”

People with kids

Yeah I don't understand the obsession with space. You are paying tons of money to just house a bunch of stuff you don't use most of the time, and to sit inside, where it is boring.

OP, as your kids get older, you will need less space. Teens take up less space than toddlers! And then they will be out of the house and you will find it is just you and your husband again

People are obsessed with more space but the time that the extra space matters is only about 10 years. Kids leave, parents want to downsize again. I’d rather have a family lake house that I could use with my kids now, my grandkids in the future, can stay in the family, etc.

This really depends on the size of your house, your disposable income, and your flexibility to manage a rental property.

We have an adequately sized house with 4 bedrooms and 3 baths for a family of four. While there were times I would have liked more space, I don’t feel like we ever outgrew it. We bought a beach condo when our younger hit HS and the older in college, and it has worked out well. We spend long weekends there when there are no sports conflicts and go there frequently in the summer. Sometimes DH or I will go there for solo trips or with friends. We expect to be there a lot when DS is in college and we are both retired.

We wouldn’t have considered a second home when the kids were little and we both worked full time. Too much hassle for us even with a condo that is easy to rent and requires little maintenance.

We own a second house at the beach. We don't rent it out and we spend the summers there.
We LOVE our house and the time we spend there. All that being said, this is a no brainer for me. If I were you, I would buy a bigger primary house. You are going to trade year round comfort for a couple of weeks at the beach? And add in the extra costs of ownership and the hassle of renting? It doesn't make any sense. Not to mention, I don't think anyone has any idea of what real estate trends are going to be in the next few years. For a primary home, that matters a lot less. In the second home market - it matters. Real estate values in vacation areas are starting to come in, sit on the market longer, and could fall further.