Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Culturally it used to be a problem in the United States for women to show their ankles. It just wasn't done, and if you showed your ankles you meant something by it.

Obviously that'd be ridiculous now. I'm wearing ankle pants at work and so my bare ankles are showing and it's perfectly appropriate.

I'm noticing more and more crop tops and off-the-shoulder tops in kids' clothing sections at stores these days (think Gap and Target). It's quite possible that we are moving to a point where these things will be considered 100% as normal to show as my ankles right now.

I mean there have been cultures globally throughout history where full or nearly full nudity was normal.

It's all culturally defined.

OP just decide what your family will allow and go with it.

I mean, off the shoulder was also all the rage in the 80s. Flashdance is from 1983. We all wanted to look like Jennifer Beals on the poster even if we were too young to see the movie.

PP here. I guess you can tell I'm too young for that .

I figured!! So many people on here don’t remember the 60s or the 80s. Nothing being worn now is particularly novel unless you go back to the early 50s. The movie Grease is set in 1958 and everybody thought Sandi looked amazing in the final scene in her all black outfit with (gasp) both shoulders showing!!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Culturally it used to be a problem in the United States for women to show their ankles. It just wasn't done, and if you showed your ankles you meant something by it.

Obviously that'd be ridiculous now. I'm wearing ankle pants at work and so my bare ankles are showing and it's perfectly appropriate.

I'm noticing more and more crop tops and off-the-shoulder tops in kids' clothing sections at stores these days (think Gap and Target). It's quite possible that we are moving to a point where these things will be considered 100% as normal to show as my ankles right now.

I mean there have been cultures globally throughout history where full or nearly full nudity was normal.

It's all culturally defined.

OP just decide what your family will allow and go with it.

I mean, off the shoulder was also all the rage in the 80s. Flashdance is from 1983. We all wanted to look like Jennifer Beals on the poster even if we were too young to see the movie.

PP here. I guess you can tell I'm too young for that .

Anonymous wrote:Culturally it used to be a problem in the United States for women to show their ankles. It just wasn't done, and if you showed your ankles you meant something by it.

Obviously that'd be ridiculous now. I'm wearing ankle pants at work and so my bare ankles are showing and it's perfectly appropriate.

I'm noticing more and more crop tops and off-the-shoulder tops in kids' clothing sections at stores these days (think Gap and Target). It's quite possible that we are moving to a point where these things will be considered 100% as normal to show as my ankles right now.

I mean there have been cultures globally throughout history where full or nearly full nudity was normal.

It's all culturally defined.

OP just decide what your family will allow and go with it.

I mean, off the shoulder was also all the rage in the 80s. Flashdance is from 1983. We all wanted to look like Jennifer Beals on the poster even if we were too young to see the movie.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think a belly button is sexual. Nor a shoulder. I let my dd wear these things because she’s comfortable in her body and I never was, I’m glad she has that confidence. If another kid gets turned on by her shoulder that’s not something I can control. People have foot fetishes but we all wear sandals and flip flops in the summer.

Ok keep telling yourself this while the boy moms think your daughter looks like a ho.

Uhhh mom of a middle school boy here. Definitely would not think this. In fact, was reading this trying to figure out why off the shoulder was such a big deal. A midriff shirt I get, but off the shoulders?

You think it’s ok for anyone to have their behind cheeks hanging out of their clothes at school or anywhere besides the beach for the matter. No one wants to sit where people have their bare behinds on the seat. I bet they won’t even sit on a toilet seat. It’s gross and not appropriate to walk around almost naked in public. It’s just not.

This isn’t what the OP is describing or what most posters are talking about. I’m quite happy that gold hinge, aerie and lululemon have built in shorts under their skirts. My kid and her friends all wear what OP has described and none of them have butt cheeks hanging out. And their cropped tops are fitted and generally the belly bottom is covered except when they raise both arms. Frankly, girls showed more in 1985 with daisy dukes, jeans skirts with no shorts underneath and the cropped tops were loose and open as opposed to fitted athleisure. I wasn’t a whore in 1985 and neither is my 13 year old in 2025. And given that 80% of the girls at her middle school of 1100 kids look like this, most parents have gotten comfortable with this look. If you don’t want your daughter to wear this stuff, that is fine.

School should be a place dedicated to learning, building friendships, and developing the values and skills students need to face the world with kindness and confidence. It’s not the right environment for focusing on makeup or wearing outfits that are overly revealing—like tops that expose the midriff or barely cover the chest. While students have the freedom to dress as they wish outside of school, it's important that school attire remains appropriate and respectful. I was genuinely surprised to see how some 6th graders were dressed at our elementary school, and I worry that such outfits might be confusing or even distressing to younger students.

I think the most important thing is kids being comfortable and confident in their bodies. And not shaming them for wanting to wear something, even if you do end up nixing it. If you have a good communication with your kids you can comment something like, I wonder if that's a little too short to wear to school, but what do you think? Or, that top look so cute on you - I think it's really suitable for a party but maybe not for school.

Culturally it used to be a problem in the United States for women to show their ankles. It just wasn't done, and if you showed your ankles you meant something by it.

Obviously that'd be ridiculous now. I'm wearing ankle pants at work and so my bare ankles are showing and it's perfectly appropriate.

I'm noticing more and more crop tops and off-the-shoulder tops in kids' clothing sections at stores these days (think Gap and Target). It's quite possible that we are moving to a point where these things will be considered 100% as normal to show as my ankles right now.

I mean there have been cultures globally throughout history where full or nearly full nudity was normal.

It's all culturally defined.

OP just decide what your family will allow and go with it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think a belly button is sexual. Nor a shoulder. I let my dd wear these things because she’s comfortable in her body and I never was, I’m glad she has that confidence. If another kid gets turned on by her shoulder that’s not something I can control. People have foot fetishes but we all wear sandals and flip flops in the summer.

Ok keep telling yourself this while the boy moms think your daughter looks like a ho.

Uhhh mom of a middle school boy here. Definitely would not think this. In fact, was reading this trying to figure out why off the shoulder was such a big deal. A midriff shirt I get, but off the shoulders?

You think it’s ok for anyone to have their behind cheeks hanging out of their clothes at school or anywhere besides the beach for the matter. No one wants to sit where people have their bare behinds on the seat. I bet they won’t even sit on a toilet seat. It’s gross and not appropriate to walk around almost naked in public. It’s just not.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think a belly button is sexual. Nor a shoulder. I let my dd wear these things because she’s comfortable in her body and I never was, I’m glad she has that confidence. If another kid gets turned on by her shoulder that’s not something I can control. People have foot fetishes but we all wear sandals and flip flops in the summer.

Ok keep telling yourself this while the boy moms think your daughter looks like a ho.

Uhhh mom of a middle school boy here. Definitely would not think this. In fact, was reading this trying to figure out why off the shoulder was such a big deal. A midriff shirt I get, but off the shoulders?

She's a kid. If you don't like her clothing choices. Just tell her no. She may wear what she finds appropriate when she is 18. Until then, no.

If you do not want the argument, maybe, the items are so low quality, that they get "damaged" in the wash.

I both support girls and young women being able to wear whatever they are comfortable in and dressing for the occasion…At our 6th grade graduation, there were high school girls who gave a speech wearing sheer open shirts with literally a fancy bra top and cut off jean shorts. This seemed like they were dressed for the wrong occasion to me.

All kids should be able to wear what they like without being sexualized. And I don’t think it is appropriate clothing for school. I have a 13yo girl, and we have a rule of no bare shoulders to school, no short shorts, she wears leggings or bicycle shorts under her skirts/dresses when she wears them. I want her to be totally free to flop on the ground, hang upside down, run across a field without worrying about exposing herself. I’ve mostly lost the battle on the length of shirts and leggings…they really do all just wear them at the waist or higher. I’ve gotten her to mostly hip length for shirts and she wears a tank under cropped shirts.

Lots of sick twisted people in this thread. So gross. Go somewhere else with your fetish for sexualizing 12 year olds.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t think a belly button is sexual. Nor a shoulder. I let my dd wear these things because she’s comfortable in her body and I never was, I’m glad she has that confidence. If another kid gets turned on by her shoulder that’s not something I can control. People have foot fetishes but we all wear sandals and flip flops in the summer.

Ok keep telling yourself this while the boy moms think your daughter looks like a ho.

We compromised with shoulders out in middle school. A shirt that possibly shows her belly button is ok. A shirt that is intended to show her belly button isn't. We will reassess in high school.