This is still very much a thing in NYC and Long Island. My husband grew up with two live in housekeepers that did all of this, his parents still have them as well as his siblings. We live in another city and they think it is nuts that you actually have to hire multiple people to fill all of the roles OP is asking about.

I am a SAHM who has transitioned to a SAHW role now. I don't think any one person can do everything that you are asking.

I never had a babysitter or a nanny. I did everything related to childcare, education, summer camps, EC activities, medical checkups, traveling, socializing that my kids needed etc. However, we had a cleaning lady every two weeks and we had a person who mowed our lawns. My husband and I cooked together.

As my kids have moved out of the house now, I still have the cleaning lady, the landscape person and an occasional caterer.

This exists but it's almost exclusively immigrant women who have raised their kids and are not grandparents yet. Our old nanny was Ukrainian and she cleaned and cooked (I didn't ask for cleaning she just didn't sit still during nap times). She was 55, divorced and with an adult daughter and no grandkids yet. Adored my kids and the house was so put together for the 4 years she was with us. She found a nice man and got married and moved or we would have kept her on when kids were school age. We paid well and did taxes and unemployment.

We have a family member who has someone who does that role, or did. Their youngest is in college so there’s no childcare.

She doesn’t do heavy cleaning or yard work but does everything else, including things like taking the cars for service, researching options for vacation or Christmas shopping for all the nieces and nephews.

She is an immigrant who has now become a citizen. I am pretty sure they pay her more than I make. They give her a huge amount of flexibility, and other benefits, especially since they have no childcare needs. She is totally worth it.

I’ve seen nanny housekeeper jobs posted. I think expectations should be very clear, ie 1 hour of childcare 3 hours of cleaning. This is probably easily managed.

And be clear in what you’re looking for in each, for example in that hour housekeeper/nanny drives kids to school. In the three hours cleans out the fridge, wipes it down, runs laundry, cleans a bathroom, cleans fruit and veggies for the week. Simple stuff like that.

I think $30 an hour is more than fair for this kind of work, but you’ll find plenty of folks expecting much more than that on DCum

Anonymous wrote:First of all, they're not girls. They're professionals and maybe they're men. For what you want you have to pay 6 figures and pretty nice benefits. At least that's what I got paid. I threw in Mandarin lessons too, and my charges are all fluent.

Wanted to add I didn't actually clean and cook but managed the cleaners schedules, ran the robovacs on my app and planned the lunch and dinner menus for the chef.

So a house manger does just that. Manages. That Girl might not be the one scrubbing toilets but she'll put you on a schedule to do it yourself OP

Anonymous wrote:You need a wife. An all around domestic servant.

Or a husband.
But yes--this is why some families choose to have a SAHP even when the kids are in school.

That being said, you can get pretty much anything you want as long as you are willing to pay the right price. How much have you tried offering potential candidates?

Anonymous wrote:You can probably find someone from an immigrant community who could happily keep all things running in your home; maybe consider looking for someone whose kids or grandkids also go to your kids’ school.

If they have kids the same age as OP's they would need to be off work the same days/hours that OP would need them to work.

I actually wonder how hard you’ve tried to find this? It definitely exists though I think you need to hire a housekeeper who will do occasional childcare. We have a housekeeper 30 hours a week ($30/hour). We also have biweekly cleaners who come so the housekeeper does more daily cleaning, laundry, and household management. She’s NOT who I would choose as a nanny but she’s happy to cover some time here and there and she loves our kids!

Anonymous wrote:Someone would definitely take this job whether you called them a girl or not. If you haven’t found your person then you aren’t offering enough money or not being flexible enough with expectations.

Right but the point is that the OP referring to this help as “girl” circles back to how little she respects this work or values this labor. See the connection?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want a woman, not a girl. My brother and his wife hired a nanny who also cleans. Once the youngest started full day preschool she cleaned a lot more. She picks him up from school and takes him to the playground or brings him home.

She cooks lunch each day - sometimes real cooking, sometimes heating up dinner leftovers, sometimes sandwiches - and dinner a couple nights a week. I have been to their house at all times of day, all days of the week and never seen a speck of dust anywhere.

🏹 guaranteed 100% she's an immigrant. No American will do this for less than about $125,000. And now that Trump is kicking out all the immigrants, child care costs are going to soar

I will guarantee for you that yes, she is from a different country. I am not sure trump will find her, but regardless they live in a sanctuary city so she'll probably be fine.

Anonymous wrote:I’m looking for a girl who can act as an all-for-one service. My kids are older and in school but I’ll need her for days they’re sick or miss school.

I want someone for about 40 hours a week and it makes sense to have them clean and run errands when not caring for kids but it seems I can only nannies who don’t do deep cleanings or housekeepers who don’t do childcare.

Yes. I am willing to pay and give benefits.

First hire a woman but, realistically you want a wife. No money would be enough to do it for me

I’ve had friends employ their former nannies to do this once their kids are all in school. They have to be ok with it though

Anonymous wrote:You want a woman, not a girl. My brother and his wife hired a nanny who also cleans. Once the youngest started full day preschool she cleaned a lot more. She picks him up from school and takes him to the playground or brings him home.

She cooks lunch each day - sometimes real cooking, sometimes heating up dinner leftovers, sometimes sandwiches - and dinner a couple nights a week. I have been to their house at all times of day, all days of the week and never seen a speck of dust anywhere.

🏹 guaranteed 100% she's an immigrant. No American will do this for less than about $125,000. And now that Trump is kicking out all the immigrants, child care costs are going to soar

Anonymous wrote:There's less availability, but they're out there. You need to offer at least $35/hour with guaranteed pay, PTO, paid holidays, and pretty set hours while kids are in school.

$35?! I’m not even watching your kids for only $35/hr much less cleaning your toilets.