Anonymous wrote:LACs can be a difficult environment for a shy introvert. Everyone knows each others business at small schools. Like living in a fishbowl. Hell on earth.

Absolutely this ^^

Anonymous wrote:Not all shy people want to be at a tiny school that's a LAC. I know a couple of shy, introverted kids who LOVED huge schools like Berkeley and Wisconsin because they could do their own thing and find their own people.

Thank you. I was a shy, introverted kid but attended a large state school because it had the major I wanted. I absolutely loved it. No, I didn’t magically become an extrovert but life was so much more interesting being surrounded by all sorts of people rather than a tiny, stifling environment full of other people just like me who need lots of alone time. I met some of my best friends there - they knew when to make sure I was included in events and when to give me space and downtime. I didn’t go Greek, and most of my friends didn’t either. We nevertheless had plenty of social opportunities.

My own introverted kids are looking at similar schools. They realize they can find their people much more easily when there are more people to be found.

2 shy kids at different Ivies. I don’t think it matters where they go. If they were successful in the past, they will continue to be successful.

My quiet kid (Is she shy? Maybe. Never had too many friends). She chose a big state school instead of LAC. I initially thought LAC would be better for her, but then I worried that she wouldn’t find friends right away, and then that would be it. People would have friends and she’d be left out. At a big school, you can always keep trying. And that’s what she did. She didn’t find friends on her hall, but she kept trying and found friends on another hall. Then, later found friends at an extracurricular.

My shy, introverted, smart kid is going to Rose-Hulman in the fall.

My shy kid will be attending a SLAC. Doesn't mind talking in class but wants a low-key social environment.

Anonymous wrote:LACs can be a difficult environment for a shy introvert. Everyone knows each others business at small schools. Like living in a fishbowl. Hell on earth.

This is the experience of someone who’s super into drama. I didn’t know almost anyone’s business on my lac campus, nor cared. If you invite drama, you’ll know drama.

LACs can be a difficult environment for a shy introvert. Everyone knows each others business at small schools. Like living in a fishbowl. Hell on earth.

My DS was like that and is at UVA. I was like that and went to a small liberal arts college where I reinvented myself

Hm... shy and introvert are not the same thing, though. My oldest is a bit shy but mostly an extreme introvert. He is at UVA, which I think works for the introvert side of him but is challenging for the shy side. It took him a while to make friends but he did eventually and is happy there.

Anonymous wrote:Also, look for research universities with known introverted/academic cultures:

University of Chicago
Rice University
Carnegie Mellon
Rochester Institute of Technology
Case Western Reserve

These are all fantastic options, OP!

Anonymous wrote:Haverford

Yep, Haverford would be good.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LACs.

Why LACs?

They can thrive in a smaller environment. Check out Davidson, OP.

I went state university, ended up rushing, and President of the sorority. Heard the President of the student body at one of the 5Cs give a speech about being the most shy, introverted person on campus until she realized it was only she that could make meeting people happen. Kids often surprise you with who they really are or become when they are on their own.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LACs.

Why LACs?

SLACs are small enough that quiet introverted people aren’t drowned or left out. Less emphasis on social or Greek scene.

Harvey Mudd
Reed College
Swarthmore
Mount Holyoke
Grinnell

Large schools are awesome for shy people. No one will ask your name, no one really cares about what you’re up to.

Going to an LAC as a shy person sounds kinda frustrating tbh. You’d have to be fine with constantly being called or expected to talk in class, and you’re constantly surrounded by people you know (I loved this, but I’m an extrovert).