Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 20:38     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
Anonymous wrote:I bet most people who have been poor help more people than those who have never been poor. I am OP and I pay my brother's phone and utilities, paid for all of my mothers extras, and my entire career has been in public interest law.


You are going to regret this eventually. Ask me how I know. One, because the helping never ends, and how you help in one way begets more helping--you help with getting a house, then you need to commit to visiting them at that house and helping them there, even if it far away. And two, the people you are helping see your aid as so normative that they don't really see it as help and think they have achived what they have despite "challenges", so they feel special about that, as if they have actually worked harder and achived more than you, because you had it "easy".

Also are you African American? Welcome to the "black tax". Stop paying the "black tax".
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 20:25     Subject: Re:Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
My parents paid for my college and I am so thankful for that! But graduate school and everything else was on me and I think we are likely ultra high net worth. My parents also taught me the value of working hard and saving and for that I am also thankful.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 14:52     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
Anonymous wrote:I want to encourage people who didn't have help for college or financial gifts from family or inheritances to post here to brag about what they have accomplished financially. I will go first. My single mom never made $40K her whole life and wasn't able to help me financially. I now have a net worth of $3 million (with husband and kid) at 50. I know I am just part of the mass affluent, but this is more than I ever thought I would have. What about you?


So you didn't take FAFSA? No Pell grants or scholarships at all? No work study? Your single mom never took SNAP or WIC? Never got EITC or childcare credit?

Everyone gets help somewhere. Good for you for making it big on less than most, but you definitely got help.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 13:42     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
I bet most people who have been poor help more people than those who have never been poor. I am OP and I pay my brother's phone and utilities, paid for all of my mothers extras, and my entire career has been in public interest law.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 12:30     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
Never mind getting help. What about helping other while trying to make it.
I worked years for less than minimum wage, and helped my parents buy their homes and a car abroad.
I can name 15 losers who go money out of me while I worked long hours for below minimum wage. This is what happens if you are surrounded by others in need and with no money skills.
I was really good at money, so they all came to 'borrow' and often I simply lost it to wage theft.
I'm retired now at 46 having made $40k a year only once in 27 years. Crazy are my money skill plus I got rid of all the 'borrowers'.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 12:28     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
Anonymous wrote:My mom did it entirely on her own and her parents were neglectful. My life has been more comfortable though. I have never had a car loan, my parents bought my first car. I paid cash for the rest of them. My parents/grandparents fully covered undergrad. My In-laws provided downpayment and closing costs for the house.


Nobody does it entirely on their own
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 12:25     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
Grew up extremely poor
Religious household of uneducated fools and criminals
College grad school
Paid by me after age 17 on my own

Started a company with DH we are the 1 percent
How did we get there ? Reading!

Raised my children to be intelligent kind humans. Not one supports republicans or religion. The6 have brain cells

I wouldn’t wish the way I grew up on anyone yet here we are children will now grow up in the worst possible Christian nationalist crap

Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 12:15     Subject: Re:Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
Anonymous wrote:
I'm very proud of myself but will say the fear of economic insecurity continues to drive me,


This is me too. I left home young and put myself through school. Shortly after I left home my dad died. The only time I ever asked for money (for school) no one had any to give.

Anyway, I bought a house at 26. Worked hard. Married and stayed married. Have kids including two with special needs who required lots of support beyond what was publicly available. Plus we had over $200k in medical bills. But here we are with two paid off houses, able to give our kids education and a nice life and $3m or so in net worth.

All if the years of struggling did have an effect though. I still worry and i cautiously spend. I take comfort in knowing social security will be enough for us when we reach that point.


PP who posted this. I want to work this year on having less fear of lack of money. I have had 300K+ in a HYSA for the past 3 years and would be lying if I said I didn't have regret over the gains I could have made in the market. I am most comfortable with 1 year expenses in savings vs the standard 6 months. But that would still give me at least 100K+ to invest. And yet everytime I think about doing it I get cold feet.

Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 10:07     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
My mom did it entirely on her own and her parents were neglectful. My life has been more comfortable though. I have never had a car loan, my parents bought my first car. I paid cash for the rest of them. My parents/grandparents fully covered undergrad. My In-laws provided downpayment and closing costs for the house.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 09:33     Subject: Re:Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
I'm very proud of myself but will say the fear of economic insecurity continues to drive me,


This is me too. I left home young and put myself through school. Shortly after I left home my dad died. The only time I ever asked for money (for school) no one had any to give.

Anyway, I bought a house at 26. Worked hard. Married and stayed married. Have kids including two with special needs who required lots of support beyond what was publicly available. Plus we had over $200k in medical bills. But here we are with two paid off houses, able to give our kids education and a nice life and $3m or so in net worth.

All if the years of struggling did have an effect though. I still worry and i cautiously spend. I take comfort in knowing social security will be enough for us when we reach that point.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 08:18     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
No one is saying mother's sacrifices aren't help. My mom made me the person I am today. But on this thread we are allowing people who did not have financial help from their families in adulthood to brag about their financial accomplishments. This is pretty different from the standard DCUM money posts where some 35 year old gripes about having to pay into social security or someone worries that with 10million they don't have to retire.

The truth is that most wealthy people received help from their families for college and didn't have student loan help, get a car from mom and dad when they graduate (or turn 16) have their parents pay for their kids education, get yearly help, inherit riches, etc.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 08:08     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
This is interesting how many people don't see their mother's sacrifices in particular as help. Obviously people helped you along the way and not to acknowledge that help is horrible. Like that person whose husband was lucky enough to work for a company with tuition reimbursement and whose brother told him about a 401k--those both were huge! That was a lot of help!
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 07:45     Subject: Re:Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
I’m a single mother and by living a very pared down lifestyle plus my kid choosing a college wisely, he will graduate without owing any money.
Anonymous
Post 01/04/2025 07:25     Subject: Re:Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
If people got need based scholarships or reduced cost loans for college, they had help. Those programs are meant to help.
Anonymous
Post 01/03/2025 22:52     Subject: Post your accomplishments if you didn't get help from others
Having gone without sleep around the clock for two newborns, your mom did help. She might not have been able to help as much as she wanted but she did. I hope you feel for those whose mothers were able to help even less.