I’m a really frugal person, too. I have actually found it stressful to be on vacations my husband has planned without being as careful as I like to be with money. I have done my best not to show it. But when he’s chosen a really pricey hotel or the best available tickets for sports events or theaters I feel this terrible pressure for everything to be perfect—which things rarely are, especially with little kids. I guess I’m just saying this as a counterpoint to those saying that paying more leads to a less stressful trip.

For me, it has been helpful to think about our travel budget over a long period of time so we can think about the big trips we know we’re going to need to spend a lot on and then try to save on smaller trips. For example, we want to go to the Great Smoky Mountains this year and have figured out ways to do it really cheaply. We also want to do a safari in 3 years and are saving up because cheaping out could lead to a terrible experience and we don’t want to risk it. For a family of 3, we have a travel budget of 4K a year—but we don’t spend that each year—some of it gets saved for the big trips.

Anonymous wrote:$1300 for a week of accommodations for a family of 5 is unreasonable.

If I'm going to parent in a different location, I'm at least going to be comfortable. Get the air conditioning. Get the dishwasher. You CAN afford it!

This.

Anonymous wrote:You have to decide that. Budget for "essentials"---that includes mortgage, taxes, healthcare, cars/insurance, basic food (cooking all meals at home), retirement savings, college savings, etc.

Then see what is left. Together you decide how to spend/save that amount.

I would add to this - what would you have to sacrifice if you spent the extra? Is it something you feel ok about? Like if you're not getting the bare bones lodging option - does that mean you're not going to be able to pay your mortgage? Does it mean you're putting less into the 529? Does it mean you're going to have to stretch out something else - wear the same winter coats another year or something? Or will you actually not notice the difference?

I'd think about it like that instead of trying to just determine without context what is "reasonable" or not. It's reasonable or not for you and your life.

But I'll also say - if your spouse is unhappy with the travel you're doing, you should factor that in. Life is hard and vacations are scarce. There's really no point in taking a vacation that people aren't finding enjoyable, I think. See where you can move money from another bucket into a bigger vacation bucket, if what you're doing now isn't working for everyone. There is no extra virtue in a cabin with no a/c.

My husband and I decided to make family vacations a priority. Why? Because we only have a certain number of years to vacation as a family unit with our kids before the oldest launches and starts his own life…wherever and with whomever.

We try to alternate big trips (Europe, etc.) with slightly less expensive trips, but we still pay what is probably a shocking amount on travel.

DH and I both accumulate travel points on airlines and hotels through business travel. We also have credit cards that accumulate points/status for airlines and hotels. These help.

We don’t camp and I’d never stay anywhere without AC. We’ve stayed at some super fancy places but we regularly opt for a Hilton brand suite (or room with 2 beds plus a sofa).

When my husband balks at the cost of an upcoming trip, I tend to flag what other expenses I’ll scale back or eliminate. We’ve basically become quite minimalist aside from travel. I can’t even remember the last time I paid someone to do my nails and I tend to make coffee at home, etc…and we probably spent upwards of $40k on travel in 2024 (including our upcoming winter break trip). Roughly $10k of that was covered by points. HHI $350k.

But there are trade offs. We are living with a kitchen that hasn’t been updated since the early 1990s and the original furniture we bought when we moved into our home. And we drive our cars until they die. And my cell phone is really old. We do our own housecleaning and yard work. So travel is where we splurge…at least for now until the kids launch…

We prioritize travel and experiences.

We don’t care as much about stuff so no big house, latest car, phone, etc…

HHI around 200k. We spend about 15K in travel a year.

Anonymous wrote:I am not a big spender, but I have let it go on travel. Our kids aren't going to travel with us forever, and we have such great family time on trips.

I will gladly spend $10,000 on a summer vacation for a family of four. Throw in either spring break or winter break and/or a long weekend here or there and we probably spend about $18,000 a year on travel for the four of us. We have never regretted it. Our HHI is about $250,000.

Sounds like us!

Travel and family vacations are the memories and times together that we cherish the most so they are a top priority when it comes to spending. I know that on my death bed I will look back at all the great memories more than I will look back at having a perfect house or fancy cars. But everyone has different priorities and things that make them happy. As long as you have the major bases covered- retirement, college funds, and savings I say start a vacation fund. I think it can feel easier to spend that money on vacation if it has been put aside specifically for vacation.

You have the income/resources to afford more better vacations. You can stretch your money and get more bang for the buck:

-book airfare far in advance. Usually most airlines open booking 11 months out. Booking early is key to getting good fares.
-which means you need to know where you want to go. Always have a few ideas ready and when you see a decent fare to one of your destinations, snatch it.
-have a family bottom line for basic comfort level, e.g., ac in summer; not too isolated/far from attractions, etc. Use that as guidelines going forward, instead of trying to save save save at every turn.
-know where to splurge. Your Disney story is a great example. It offered great value to your family.

Happy travels!

This is what helps:
What you can't control - airfare
What you can control to reduce costs - lodging, transportation and eating, excursions/activities.

Learn to like walking, eating minimally and do what the locals do and eat where they eat. It's cheaper!

Travel has gotten more popular so prices are up around the board. We travel to Europe every summer at the same time of year and same country to visit DH's family. Prices the last couple years are double what we paid 5-10 years ago.

My only advice is plan ahead -- you can save lots. We're going again to DH's home country and got round-trip business class tickets to Europe for $2,400 each.. but we also bought 10 months in advance.

Anonymous wrote:It’s some kind of % of income. I googled what is a good travel budget. Somewhere between 5-10% of your income per Google.

We have a HHI of ~350k and spend about 40k per year on travel which I was afraid would be considered an obscene amount, but glad to hear we’re not too far out of the range of normal!

That being said, travel is a huge priority for us and one of our main splurges. We make up for it by being frugal in other ways like buying less house than we could technically afford, driving older non-luxury cars, etc…. We definitely spent a good bit less on travel when our kids were in the daycare years but probably still in the 15-20k range.

I agree with 13:58, that it's about your priorities and the amount of research and prep you're willing to do. If your priority is seeing the world, you might be more inclined to take economy seating and a budget but clean and well-reviewed hotel. If your priority is comfort and ease of booking, you might be more inclined to take the first offer available at a 5 star resort. Like that PP, we tend to be the more adventurous, budget-conscious family.

But NEITHER of these approaches, by themselves, will make your kids resent you! You can be happy during budget trips and miserable on luxury trips. As long as basic necessities are met (reasonable temp and humidity control, beds you can sleep on, no bugs, edible food, adequate privacy and cleanliness)... then it's all about attitude, absence of stress and conflict, etc.

I agree that these basic necessities are often more easily met with more expensive travel arrangements. But you still need to do your homework, and read reviews, because some places aren't all they're cracked up to be. I'm the trip planner in the family, because my husband never does his due diligence and we've ended up in unpleasant places when he's picked the hotels, etc.

You have to decide that. Budget for "essentials"---that includes mortgage, taxes, healthcare, cars/insurance, basic food (cooking all meals at home), retirement savings, college savings, etc.

Then see what is left. Together you decide how to spend/save that amount.

I
This is a personal question that will look different for everyone, their lifestyle, and values. My family doesn’t earn quite as much as yours and we live in a lower COL area but using a COL calculator our similar income in the Northern VA area would be around 200k for our family of 4. We could easily rent a beach house for 3-4k for a week annually like a lot of families but that isn’t my style. I love travel & adventure. I value lots of different experiences so we take ultra low-budget tent camping vacations to trips in Europe. I do it all as affordably as I can so that our money goes farther. Most of the time I can find nice lodging with good reviews. We’ve done tent camping, camping cabins, state park cabins, motels, hotels, apartment rentals, house rentals, and family hostels (sooo much better than I expected). Most of the time I’ve been able to easily find decent lodging at or under $1,500 a week though a couple of times its been more like 2k. I do try to use some calculators to keep my spending reasonable but there’s no reason that you SHOULD spend x amount of money or your kids will have a horrible childhood. It’s less about how much you actually spend and what you do.

$1300 for a week of accommodations for a family of 5 is unreasonable.

If I'm going to parent in a different location, I'm at least going to be comfortable. Get the air conditioning. Get the dishwasher. You CAN afford it!

I am not a big spender, but I have let it go on travel. Our kids aren't going to travel with us forever, and we have such great family time on trips.

I will gladly spend $10,000 on a summer vacation for a family of four. Throw in either spring break or winter break and/or a long weekend here or there and we probably spend about $18,000 a year on travel for the four of us. We have never regretted it. Our HHI is about $250,000.