Anonymous
Post 10/29/2024 17:50     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I have never invited my friends' kids to my house.


Maybe you don’t have any friends??


I do, they just leave their baggage at home.
Anonymous
Post 10/29/2024 08:50     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We had one kid over for a playdate who had impulse issues, was a liar, etc.

I told my 1st grade kid there was one non-negotiable. The door to the master bedroom was to remain closed and off-limits. It was messy and there were grownup things I didn't want the child to have access to (coin tray, paperwork, etc.).

Within the first hour, I caught my son and his friend running through the room on their way into the master bath for no good reason. Those two spaces are self-contained and didn't need to be visited by the kids.

That was it for playdates with that kid at our house.


So you blamed the other child and not yours


That was also my thought. Weird response. Your kid doesn't know how to follow rules in their own house? What do you think happens when he's at someone else's house?


That was a specific rule set up for a specific playdate with a specific child. My kid asked if they could play upstairs in his bedroom. We have a small house and normally all guests stay on the ground level where the main t.v. and toy corner and train table are.

I had one condition and it was discussed several times in advance and agreed to.

My son basically forgot because his friend was a tearing around, lippy kind of kid.

Feel free to find my life weird.

My kid was well-behaved and frequently invited back.

The other kid grew up to still be a risk taker and behavior problem. Although he has some redeeming qualities, I'm glad my son stayed out of his orbit. Kid is an underaged drinker and motorcyclist.


Your kid didn’t “forget”, or isn’t as conscientious as you think he is. My kid knows to come tell me if rules are not being followed. She also knows to blame me if there’s something she doesn’t want to do at another house that seems weird to her, like going in a main bedroom “my mom won’t let me”.

And LOL at “motorcyclist” being some kind of slur.
Anonymous
Post 10/29/2024 08:43     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:Pp again. I have kids ages 7-15. If they have a friend, not a family friend, who misbehaves or is a bad guest, we don’t invite them again. I emphasize to my kids that they should be polite and behave well at others’ homes.

My 13yo had a close friend who would make a giant mess in our kitchen, raid our fridge and pantry, start cooking, take out appliances, stain our carpet, chairs, etc. I wondered if he behaved this way at his house. I’m not sure if he is just rude, has some sort of mild disorder or what. I don’t want him at our house.


Where was your kid in all this? “Hey Larlo, my mom says no going pantry”.

And surely if their friend makes a mess, they can clean up without your assistance?
Anonymous
Post 10/28/2024 21:02     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We had one kid over for a playdate who had impulse issues, was a liar, etc.

I told my 1st grade kid there was one non-negotiable. The door to the master bedroom was to remain closed and off-limits. It was messy and there were grownup things I didn't want the child to have access to (coin tray, paperwork, etc.).

Within the first hour, I caught my son and his friend running through the room on their way into the master bath for no good reason. Those two spaces are self-contained and didn't need to be visited by the kids.

That was it for playdates with that kid at our house.


So you blamed the other child and not yours


That was also my thought. Weird response. Your kid doesn't know how to follow rules in their own house? What do you think happens when he's at someone else's house?


That was a specific rule set up for a specific playdate with a specific child. My kid asked if they could play upstairs in his bedroom. We have a small house and normally all guests stay on the ground level where the main t.v. and toy corner and train table are.

I had one condition and it was discussed several times in advance and agreed to.

My son basically forgot because his friend was a tearing around, lippy kind of kid.

Feel free to find my life weird.

My kid was well-behaved and frequently invited back.

The other kid grew up to still be a risk taker and behavior problem. Although he has some redeeming qualities, I'm glad my son stayed out of his orbit. Kid is an underaged drinker and motorcyclist.
Anonymous
Post 10/28/2024 20:29     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:I have never invited my friends' kids to my house.


Maybe you don’t have any friends??
Anonymous
Post 10/28/2024 18:22     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
I have never invited my friends' kids to my house.
Anonymous
Post 10/27/2024 15:13     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:We had one kid over for a playdate who had impulse issues, was a liar, etc.

I told my 1st grade kid there was one non-negotiable. The door to the master bedroom was to remain closed and off-limits. It was messy and there were grownup things I didn't want the child to have access to (coin tray, paperwork, etc.).

Within the first hour, I caught my son and his friend running through the room on their way into the master bath for no good reason. Those two spaces are self-contained and didn't need to be visited by the kids.

That was it for playdates with that kid at our house.


So you blamed the other child and not yours


That was also my thought. Weird response. Your kid doesn't know how to follow rules in their own house? What do you think happens when he's at someone else's house?
Anonymous
Post 10/27/2024 14:39     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:If my friend's kid is over it's because I'm watching him. The little monster is super active, so I usually take him outside to play soccer. Last time we played for 3 hours.
Great kid. Glad he is in school, in aftercare, and in soccer camp.
For those who invite easy kids over, don't invite mine over unless yours is easy also.
It's almost always the parent with a problem kid who wants their kid to have company. Please make sure you are there and your kid doesn't climb on mine or whatever mean things they do.
I've found my kid crying on playground because the other kid 'was too much', and this is in public.


My kids are super easy. They’re invited to play dates often. I guess that’s why it’s easy to be picky about who to invite: lots of options.
Anonymous
Post 10/27/2024 13:27     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
Anonymous wrote:When your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters, do you judge the parents, or pity them?

One kid comes over and the mom lets the kid stay all day, so I think she knows what's up


This is on you for not setting boundaries the first time it happened. And, yes, I judge them. Any child could have an off day but when that happens, you pick up your child and go home. I had a neighbor who came over with her children and one of them picked up a crystal candy dish and threw it in the floor. I had no qualms in telling her that I had another appointment and it was time for her to leave. As for letting a kid even come over without first asking me, well I wouldn't even open the door.

Stop being her doormat!
Anonymous
Post 10/27/2024 13:23     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
OP, you will find there are a lot of shitty parents in this area . A lot. They see no problem with their child's behavior and act like you're the problem.

Enforce your house rules.

Encourage as much outdoor play as you can.

And if a child is truly unruly and won't correct with minimal correction from you they don't come over again.

Learn now to be comfortable with being the bad guy in this area. It'll happen again, when you won't get your kid a phone, or a snapchat, or serve alcohol , or give your kids a curfew and on and on it goes.
Anonymous
Post 10/27/2024 13:08     Subject: when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
If my friend's kid is over it's because I'm watching him. The little monster is super active, so I usually take him outside to play soccer. Last time we played for 3 hours.
Great kid. Glad he is in school, in aftercare, and in soccer camp.
For those who invite easy kids over, don't invite mine over unless yours is easy also.
It's almost always the parent with a problem kid who wants their kid to have company. Please make sure you are there and your kid doesn't climb on mine or whatever mean things they do.
I've found my kid crying on playground because the other kid 'was too much', and this is in public.
Anonymous
Post 10/27/2024 12:52     Subject: Re:when your friends kids come over and they act like little monsters
My house, my rules. If the little monster doesn’t like it he doesn’t have to return. I expect kids playing together will get loud and crazy but I won’t tolerate meanness and exclusion with my kids or any other kids.