Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to hijack, but as a parent of an high level 12 U swimmer (think PVS Champs A finalist in multiple events), what do you all think has caused your kids to get to the point where they want to give up the sport? My swimmer right now wants to swim D1, and is on that trajectory, but I’m curious to know from others in that situation what changed their kids’ mindset?

Parent of a 13 year old club swimmer here. What are the pros and cons of swimming in HS? Seems like a lot to juggle between November and February right in the thick of the SC season in the lead up to champs. If his goal to swim in college (could be D3), do college coaches/teams care/pay attention to your HS times?

HS swim is fun and, yes, the times from the big meets count (Metros, State champs, etc.). Many club swimmers do their best times at these meets.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to hijack, but as a parent of an high level 12 U swimmer (think PVS Champs A finalist in multiple events), what do you all think has caused your kids to get to the point where they want to give up the sport? My swimmer right now wants to swim D1, and is on that trajectory, but I’m curious to know from others in that situation what changed their kids’ mindset?

Parent of a 13 year old club swimmer here. What are the pros and cons of swimming in HS? Seems like a lot to juggle between November and February right in the thick of the SC season in the lead up to champs. If his goal to swim in college (could be D3), do college coaches/teams care/pay attention to your HS times?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to hijack, but as a parent of an high level 12 U swimmer (think PVS Champs A finalist in multiple events), what do you all think has caused your kids to get to the point where they want to give up the sport? My swimmer right now wants to swim D1, and is on that trajectory, but I’m curious to know from others in that situation what changed their kids’ mindset?

OP here. My kid was all in for 5+ years. Swam NCSAs, Zones, Futures, etc. Most of her life revolved around the sport, including social life. But intensity and frequency of training in first year of HS made her rethink. As a PP described, kids at this level miss out on a lot of other activities because they have to go to bed early and wake up early and swim every day after school. I just think that routine for 3 more years was not what she wanted anymore.

I also think that they realize that they are not really that fast in the scheme of things and that even if they can be recruited for a D1 school, it may not be the school they really want to attend. Not to mention, adding on 4 more years of the grind.

Sounds like there are several of us parents of high level HS kids who have quit or heavily considering it. Over the years I've noticed the kids this age quit and wondered what it was. The early mornings, lack of sleep, lack of time to socialize, intense training and being worn out etc are all a factor. But for my swimming it's the demands of a heavy junior course load that will be what puts them over the edge. If the coach isn't forgiving of them missing practices to study then it's over.

DD still swims year round club and enjoys it but I think that is in key part because she stopped maxing out all the practices when she hit HS so she could do other stuff too.

She treads water basically Aug - Oct during band season by just doing about 3 practices a week. She doesn’t do the weight training sessions anytime because she is not out of school early enough. If a big school event, band event or HS swim event happens until really late then she misses the early weekend swim day. It means she is not as top notch a swimmer as she could be but it also means she has a life beyond the pool.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to hijack, but as a parent of an high level 12 U swimmer (think PVS Champs A finalist in multiple events), what do you all think has caused your kids to get to the point where they want to give up the sport? My swimmer right now wants to swim D1, and is on that trajectory, but I’m curious to know from others in that situation what changed their kids’ mindset?

OP here. My kid was all in for 5+ years. Swam NCSAs, Zones, Futures, etc. Most of her life revolved around the sport, including social life. But intensity and frequency of training in first year of HS made her rethink. As a PP described, kids at this level miss out on a lot of other activities because they have to go to bed early and wake up early and swim every day after school. I just think that routine for 3 more years was not what she wanted anymore.

Thanks, this makes a lot of sense. My swimmer doesn’t take a big jump up in training until next season when they will be 13, but these are all things to be mindful of when they do make that leap.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to hijack, but as a parent of an high level 12 U swimmer (think PVS Champs A finalist in multiple events), what do you all think has caused your kids to get to the point where they want to give up the sport? My swimmer right now wants to swim D1, and is on that trajectory, but I’m curious to know from others in that situation what changed their kids’ mindset?

Expectations and stress. The kids I've known who stepped back were very good at 12&u and thought of themselves as Better swimmers. When they hit a plateau or other swimmers passed them or they just weren't quite as good at 14 as 12, they were embarrassed and frustrated and decided to just opt out. Two quit altogether, one took a break and came back, one kept training but quit competing.

Anonymous wrote:I don’t mean to hijack, but as a parent of an high level 12 U swimmer (think PVS Champs A finalist in multiple events), what do you all think has caused your kids to get to the point where they want to give up the sport? My swimmer right now wants to swim D1, and is on that trajectory, but I’m curious to know from others in that situation what changed their kids’ mindset?

OP here. My kid was all in for 5+ years. Swam NCSAs, Zones, Futures, etc. Most of her life revolved around the sport, including social life. But intensity and frequency of training in first year of HS made her rethink. As a PP described, kids at this level miss out on a lot of other activities because they have to go to bed early and wake up early and swim every day after school. I just think that routine for 3 more years was not what she wanted anymore.

I don’t mean to hijack, but as a parent of an high level 12 U swimmer (think PVS Champs A finalist in multiple events), what do you all think has caused your kids to get to the point where they want to give up the sport? My swimmer right now wants to swim D1, and is on that trajectory, but I’m curious to know from others in that situation what changed their kids’ mindset?

Anonymous wrote:Junior parent and in the same boat. They wanted to quit at the start of long course but stuck it out. Agreed to swim another year but not enjoying it. I don't think they will last the club season but hopefully through HS season. I feel sad they lost the joy in something they dedicated so much time to.

OP here. I completely empathize. I feel sadness and a little anxiousness too about DD’s decision to quit but have worked hard to make sure my feelings aren’t visible to her. She seems a little adrift with all the free time she has now. But I think it’s important to give her time to figure out what she wants to do next.

Junior parent and in the same boat. They wanted to quit at the start of long course but stuck it out. Agreed to swim another year but not enjoying it. I don't think they will last the club season but hopefully through HS season. I feel sad they lost the joy in something they dedicated so much time to.

Anonymous wrote:Listen to your daughter.

+1

Listen to your daughter.

Anonymous wrote:. . . He skips social events because he has early practice the next day, misses football games, isn’t able to commit to other desirable activities or play other sports he enjoys, and lives a life that is mostly swim, school, homework, lying exhausted on the couch. Things we would do as a family - ski trips, time visiting relatives, hosting get togethers with friends - happen less because of the swim schedule. Things like study abroad opportunities are complete non-starters. There are periods where he’s extremely worn out and grumpy.

This sounds like my DS also. I’ve been encouraging him to consider quitting club or dropping down so that he can enjoy HS more. For many of them, it’s just not worth it giving up everything else in life to meet the ridiculously high expectations of the clubs.

What do you think she would regret? She probably won't be recruited to swim in college, but I assume she already knows this. My kid quit club swim in high school, but continued to enjoy high school and summer swim. She does club swim at college.