Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:US has a more individual-effort and community-effort culture than UK. People take action to achieve goals, not just moan about it and wait for the government to eventually wander by and fix things.

When someone here hears you have a problem, they assume you want to improve your situation if you can, and are willing to try something.

maybe learn to spell 'wonder' before you denigrate an entire nation of people for being subpar.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:US has a more individual-effort and community-effort culture than UK. People take action to achieve goals, not just moan about it and wait for the government to eventually wander by and fix things.

When someone here hears you have a problem, they assume you want to improve your situation if you can, and are willing to try something.

maybe learn to spell 'wonder' before you denigrate an entire nation of people for being subpar.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a DC thing where many of us have wonky policy backgrounds and see parenting as a series of problems to be solved. I think you just have to keep trying and find your people. I have one mom friend who I enjoy because we have the same perspective on schools - we’re both kind if tiger-parenty, which is VERY frowned upon in our neighborhood (apparently you’re supposed to go straight from “play based” schools to your child being naturally “advanced,” with no effort). I have another mom friend who shares my take on the nature of tween boys. But a lot of mom friends in between where I would never broach any parenting subject at all, because I don’t know what’s a hot issue with them.

Another cultural aspect is that Americans don’t always understand “taking the piss” … especially about kids! That’s my form of humor personally (maybe thanks to Grandma from Dover?) but a lot of Americans don’t get it. If I heard you complain about your youtuber kids I would get it! But there are a lot of, erm, humor impaired people around here.

op - haha you get it!
yes i find if i ever do the british thing of being honest (eg saying that some of my kids art is terrible and deserves to go in the bin immediately) I get a lot of raised eyebrows.

I would want to sit by you at the next parent event!

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remember who saved Europe

This is not a good personality to have.

Anonymous wrote:Remember who saved Europe

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a DC thing where many of us have wonky policy backgrounds and see parenting as a series of problems to be solved. I think you just have to keep trying and find your people. I have one mom friend who I enjoy because we have the same perspective on schools - we’re both kind if tiger-parenty, which is VERY frowned upon in our neighborhood (apparently you’re supposed to go straight from “play based” schools to your child being naturally “advanced,” with no effort). I have another mom friend who shares my take on the nature of tween boys. But a lot of mom friends in between where I would never broach any parenting subject at all, because I don’t know what’s a hot issue with them.

Another cultural aspect is that Americans don’t always understand “taking the piss” … especially about kids! That’s my form of humor personally (maybe thanks to Grandma from Dover?) but a lot of Americans don’t get it. If I heard you complain about your youtuber kids I would get it! But there are a lot of, erm, humor impaired people around here.

op - haha you get it!
yes i find if i ever do the british thing of being honest (eg saying that some of my kids art is terrible and deserves to go in the bin immediately) I get a lot of raised eyebrows.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it’s a DC thing where many of us have wonky policy backgrounds and see parenting as a series of problems to be solved. I think you just have to keep trying and find your people. I have one mom friend who I enjoy because we have the same perspective on schools - we’re both kind if tiger-parenty, which is VERY frowned upon in our neighborhood (apparently you’re supposed to go straight from “play based” schools to your child being naturally “advanced,” with no effort). I have another mom friend who shares my take on the nature of tween boys. But a lot of mom friends in between where I would never broach any parenting subject at all, because I don’t know what’s a hot issue with them.

Another cultural aspect is that Americans don’t always understand “taking the piss” … especially about kids! That’s my form of humor personally (maybe thanks to Grandma from Dover?) but a lot of Americans don’t get it. If I heard you complain about your youtuber kids I would get it! But there are a lot of, erm, humor impaired people around here.

op - haha you get it!
yes i find if i ever do the british thing of being honest (eg saying that some of my kids art is terrible and deserves to go in the bin immediately) I get a lot of raised eyebrows.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like private school.

op - it is. is that the issue?
private schools in the uk are much cheaper so maybe different vibe slightly.

If you are at an expensive school with competitive admissions policies you are going to run into a lot of competitive type A parents. The parents at my kids' public school are much more likely to commiserate about the dumb things their kids do than attempt to offer advice.

DP: I agree with this assessment (though not that it is a public/private school thing) -- it about personality, not being American. You have encountered a particular group that is used to solving problems; they probably do it for a living, and so their reaction is reflex. Also, they are competitive, so they will not share or show anything that could be mistaken for personal weakness, even when it's just normal everyday stuff. They operate a lot from fear -- imposter syndrome, fear of being taken advantage of, fear of public embarrassment, fear of dropping down a peg, fear of failure. These types are everywhere (in the UK too), and yes, they can appear in concentration in certain private schools and in certain public school districts.

But if you step back from them and look around, you will find the rest of us in the same places.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:US has a more individual-effort and community-effort culture than UK. People take action to achieve goals, not just moan about it and wait for the government to eventually wander by and fix things.

When someone here hears you have a problem, they assume you want to improve your situation if you can, and are willing to try something.

maybe learn to spell 'wonder' before you denigrate an entire nation of people for being subpar.

Anonymous wrote:US has a more individual-effort and community-effort culture than UK. People take action to achieve goals, not just moan about it and wait for the government to eventually wander by and fix things.

When someone here hears you have a problem, they assume you want to improve your situation if you can, and are willing to try something.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like private school.

op - it is. is that the issue?
private schools in the uk are much cheaper so maybe different vibe slightly.

If you are at an expensive school with competitive admissions policies you are going to run into a lot of competitive type A parents. The parents at my kids' public school are much more likely to commiserate about the dumb things their kids do than attempt to offer advice.