Anonymous wrote:I’ve often wondered something similar but for a different reason. I would never leave my kids and move out to go live somewhere else. Men do it ALL the time, women much less frequently. It’s not that I think they don’t love their kids, I just literally can’t comprehend how they can do it.

My dad did it, my own husband did it (left his kids with his ex). I just wouldn’t.

They do it bc it’s the most practical way to make more money and start over and they figure the mom
Is a good mom and can handle it for them. Men are practical creatures.

Why did you marry someone who did this? Probably for the financial attraction. QED.

#menhaters

My father loves me deeply, even though he is uncommunicative and unemotional. He drove me to school, made my lunches, sewed my school plays costumes, helped me with school crafts and projects, and when I was seriously ill in my 30s, flew half-way across the world to keep house for me and take care of my kids: he cooked, cleaned, dropped off and picked up the kids from school, etc. None of his love was expressed in words. Only actions.

My uncles also love their kids (and their stepkids!).

However, some men and women do not love their kids. My grandmother told my mother one day that she didn't love her, and that she should have been the long-expected son she wanted.

Sadly, I don't think my children's father genuinely cares about his kids. He loves to control them, and order them about, but ultimately for him they are only worthy if they are successful. He has consistently expressed contempt for his disabled son, yelled at him and denigrated him in front of our friends. DS managed, through extraordinarily hard work, to get a high GPA and a great ACT test score in high school - but he's still worthless in his father's eyes, because he has some visible neurodivergence that will never go away. My kids' father seems to be incapable of showing genuine affection; only displays of pride when our other children achieve something objectively excellent.

My dad loved me so much and my husband loves our daughters so much. I actually think my dad loved me more than my mom.

Do moms truly love their kids? Or do they simply care for them because of some base biological drive?

See how dumb this can get.

Anonymous wrote:Do men love their kids? Like truly love their kids or do they just take care of them out of obligation?

What a stupid mom.

Anonymous wrote:Somehow this incredibly stupid thread has taken a turn for the dumber

Agree. Impressive given how stupid the original post is.

What a dumb question. There are as many different kinds of men as there are women. Some kids are lucky to be born into situations where there is unconditional love. Unfortunately not all are - from mom, dad, or both.

My own husband is not a kid person. He remembers their birthdays but that is not what makes him an excellent Dad. He truly thinks about what he considers best for them at all times. He tries to find things to connect with his kids (even when they were little and he is not generally interested in kids). As a result, both kids adore him. And I am pretty sure that nothing in the world brings him as much joy as his children. Even the 16 year old son who he clashes with often makes him smile. His love for them is deep and secure and has absolutely nothing to do with me. And he is far from some sort of unicorn.

Somehow this incredibly stupid thread has taken a turn for the dumber

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would take a bullet for mine.

But there are a lot of “narcissists” out there, both men and women, that are incapable of it.

“I would die for you” has never impressed me. How very passive and bet.

Personally, I would *kill* for mine. And that isn’t hyperbole. I literally would.

Huh? Wouldn’t giving one’s life be a greater sacrifice than taking one?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would take a bullet for mine.

But there are a lot of “narcissists” out there, both men and women, that are incapable of it.

“I would die for you” has never impressed me. How very passive and bet.

Personally, I would *kill* for mine. And that isn’t hyperbole. I literally would.

*beta

Anonymous wrote:I would take a bullet for mine.

But there are a lot of “narcissists” out there, both men and women, that are incapable of it.

“I would die for you” has never impressed me. How very passive and bet.

Personally, I would *kill* for mine. And that isn’t hyperbole. I literally would.

Anonymous wrote:Yes, men love their children.

But not in the same way as women. Men's priority is the woman with whom they are sleeping. If that relationship ends (widowed, divorced), they will prioritize finding a new woman to sleep with, and it is very clear that finding and establishing this new relationship comes before their existing children.

Men seem to struggle with maintaining their relationship with children when the children's mother disappears.

I think the opposite is true. Men tend to form stronger relationships with their children without a mother present.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I ask this because all the men that I know spend very little time with their kids. They provide financially but make very little effort to spend time with their kids or parent. It seems like many men love the idea of a family but don’t actually want to be an active parent.

I remember watching Jimmy Kimmel and the dad’s couldn’t even get their kid’s birthday’s right. The mom’s knew all the answer’s

I think that people with similar values often group together.

My husband loves our kids very much. He spends as much time with them as I do, and is very much an active parent. His friends are also active parents, one my husband’s closest friends is a fellow dad that he met at the playground when the kids were toddlers. I think that people tend to group themselves with others that share similar values, and that includes valuing being a good parent.

Yes. PP’s experience is just an exhibition of selection sample bias. She has confused it with being the norm when in actuality it’s on the fringe.

I would take a bullet for mine.

But there are a lot of “narcissists” out there, both men and women, that are incapable of it.