In room at night, reads and falls asleep around 10 I think. During baseball season he sometimes gets home around 9:45 so it skews later

My 8th grader and 11th grader goes to bed when they want. I think it’s wise to teach kids about judgment and natural consequences this way. They make it a point to go to bed earlier when they’ve miscalculated the night before or have a test. This is a pretty low risk example of slowly introducing more freedom/responsibility. We had bedtime rules in place until 7th grade.

Anonymous wrote:My rising 4th grader goes to bed at 9pm or 10pm on nights with sports practice, so yes this sounds very early to me, but you have to do what is best for your kid and family.

A 9 year old child is very different than a 13/14 year old teenager.

Anonymous wrote:My rising 4th grader goes to bed at 9pm or 10pm on nights with sports practice, so yes this sounds very early to me, but you have to do what is best for your kid and family.

This is a middle school thread, not an elementary school thread.

Middle school busses puck up as early as 6:15 AM. Elementary busses pick up hours later. Elementary sleep schedules for kids whose schools don't start until 9:00 is irrelevant to a discussion about sleep schedules for teenagers in the peak of puberty who have to catch a school bus before the sun rises.

The bedtime key is not when you send them to bed. It is when you take tge phones and whether or not you allow the phones in their rooms.

If you allow them to keep their phone in their room, it doesn't matter if you send them to bed at 7PM after dinner, or 11:15 after the weather report.

They will be up on their phones until 3AM regardless of when you send them to bed.

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like a lot of your kids are sleeping their life away.

And some kids are overcommitted, exhausted or wasting their lives on screens. Do what works for your family.

OP - can you give an example of tik tok parents calling for an end to bedtime? Asking because I’m interested in all the bad parenting advice I keep seeing on tik tok

We aim for 9 pm (some nights not possible due to practices, homework, whatever) but they are allowed to read. Usually asleep between 10-10:30. And 6 is still rough, even with earlyish bedtime.

My rising 4th grader goes to bed at 9pm or 10pm on nights with sports practice, so yes this sounds very early to me, but you have to do what is best for your kid and family.

Following (any) advice on tiktok is just silly. Actually, even using tiktok is silly.

9pm is a fine bedtime, especially for teenager with a 6am wakeup.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My rising junior aims to be in bed by 9 and asleep 9:30. Good sleep habits have served her very well so far.

High school sports practices and orchestra / theater rehearsals end at 9pm. Sports practices are usually 3 hours (including warm ups). Game days they have team dinner immediately after school then for away games they get back aftwr 9pm. Then there is homework and volunteering.

Lucky if they are in bed by 10pm.

Fair but the poster is asking about a 7th grader, many of whom are not going to have activities that end at 9PM. My kid is entering 7th, his sports practices are over by 7 and scouts is done by 8:30. High school students have differnet schedules and a slightly later start time to their school day.

Sounds like a lot of your kids are sleeping their life away.

My rising 8th grader mostly had a bedtime of 9:30 last year, but had one night a week with a sports practice that kept him up until 10-10:30. The morning after that practice was always rough. Up at 6:15 every morning to catch a 6:50 bus.

Anonymous wrote:My rising junior aims to be in bed by 9 and asleep 9:30. Good sleep habits have served her very well so far.

High school sports practices and orchestra / theater rehearsals end at 9pm. Sports practices are usually 3 hours (including warm ups). Game days they have team dinner immediately after school then for away games they get back aftwr 9pm. Then there is homework and volunteering.

Lucky if they are in bed by 10pm.

Depends on the kid and how much sleep they require. If they are difficult to wake up or fight getting up in the morning then 9pm is too late. I don't think there is a cut and dry bed time.

Overall though I do think most kids require more than 9 hrs of sleep a nights and I think all kid need parental controls when it comes to bed time. I have so many friends who laugh about their kids being up late and having no idea what time their kids got off their phones and went to bed.

Now sometime kids just have to deal with less sleep if they have activities that go late in the evening, but this is less than ideal.