Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 12:33     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Honestly I don’t blame her. When pregnant with my second son my neighbor literally told me they felt sorry for me after asking what I was having (I had said “we are having another boy” with a smile on my face). The culture in the US is very much anti boys and as an immigrant I was taken aback and it made my gender disappointment worse.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:46     Subject: Re:Keep having boys until girl is born
I worked for a woman who was going in the opposite direction. They stopped at five girls.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:44     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've seen this crazy in both directions. It will sound weird to say, but at least when they're chasing a girl it's usually the mom's choice to go through another pregnancy. When the dad is cursing and breaking things at a gender reveal because it's another girl, you just know that uterus is in for another go whether she wants it or not.


I have three girls but hoped for a boy at some point. Obviously I love all my children and am so so so glad they are who they are! Everyone I know who did IVF either chose their children’s gender or lamented they couldn’t choose because all the viable eggs were one gender. Gender disappointment is normal but the vast majority of people realize the minute their child is born is that they have the child they were meant to have + immense gratitude.


Nice to meet you. Currently pregnant with IVF, opted not to find out the gender before implantation, still don't know and won't find out until birth. Will be happy either way (currently have one daughter).


We opted to be surprised, too.


Ok…well this is an anonymous forum, so not quite. And if you ask the IVF clinic you use I’m sure they will tell you that you are outliers. The fact is that most people wouldn’t go through IVF to choose their children’s gender but my husband’s good friend just announced to him that he was having a girl and literally yelled into the phone “we chose that shit.” My eldest daughter’s best friend’s parents chose there three kids genders. Another of my mom friend’s is sad that they only had viable male embryos. In the context of knowing a lot of people who are open about choosing their children’s gender through IVF it’s easy to see why if given the option people would choose. And in my own life I know someone who was sad that despite going through IVF she didn’t have that option. It’s very common for people to want children of both genders. The Torah literally tells parents to keep having children until they have one of each gender. It’s baked into a lot of cultures. There is no reason to pathologize.

Well incest was more accepted back then.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:43     Subject: Re:Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:Ironically one of each is the worst for the kids and family unit over time. I’ve seen studies on it. One boy/one girl siblings tend not to stay close into adulthood.

I agree. I wanted all of one sex so they’re more likely to be best friends through their lives. Also saves money on clothes, don’t have to worry about separate rooms, etc.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:41     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
I know a family like that and so far has 5 sons. Really cuckoo. Wonder at what number the mother will give up.

My mother was like that but wanted a boy to spoil. Instead she got two daughters who she was competitive and neglectful with.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:40     Subject: Re:Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:Ironically one of each is the worst for the kids and family unit over time. I’ve seen studies on it. One boy/one girl siblings tend not to stay close into adulthood.


This can easily be observed in everyday life.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:38     Subject: Re:Keep having boys until girl is born
Ironically one of each is the worst for the kids and family unit over time. I’ve seen studies on it. One boy/one girl siblings tend not to stay close into adulthood.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:36     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Where does it say that in the Torah? (Don’t mean to be rude, I’ve just never heard that before and I’m curious.)
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:30     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've seen this crazy in both directions. It will sound weird to say, but at least when they're chasing a girl it's usually the mom's choice to go through another pregnancy. When the dad is cursing and breaking things at a gender reveal because it's another girl, you just know that uterus is in for another go whether she wants it or not.


I have three girls but hoped for a boy at some point. Obviously I love all my children and am so so so glad they are who they are! Everyone I know who did IVF either chose their children’s gender or lamented they couldn’t choose because all the viable eggs were one gender. Gender disappointment is normal but the vast majority of people realize the minute their child is born is that they have the child they were meant to have + immense gratitude.


Nice to meet you. Currently pregnant with IVF, opted not to find out the gender before implantation, still don't know and won't find out until birth. Will be happy either way (currently have one daughter).


We opted to be surprised, too.


Ok…well this is an anonymous forum, so not quite. And if you ask the IVF clinic you use I’m sure they will tell you that you are outliers. The fact is that most people wouldn’t go through IVF to choose their children’s gender but my husband’s good friend just announced to him that he was having a girl and literally yelled into the phone “we chose that shit.” My eldest daughter’s best friend’s parents chose there three kids genders. Another of my mom friend’s is sad that they only had viable male embryos. In the context of knowing a lot of people who are open about choosing their children’s gender through IVF it’s easy to see why if given the option people would choose. And in my own life I know someone who was sad that despite going through IVF she didn’t have that option. It’s very common for people to want children of both genders. The Torah literally tells parents to keep having children until they have one of each gender. It’s baked into a lot of cultures. There is no reason to pathologize.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 11:11     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've seen this crazy in both directions. It will sound weird to say, but at least when they're chasing a girl it's usually the mom's choice to go through another pregnancy. When the dad is cursing and breaking things at a gender reveal because it's another girl, you just know that uterus is in for another go whether she wants it or not.


I have three girls but hoped for a boy at some point. Obviously I love all my children and am so so so glad they are who they are! Everyone I know who did IVF either chose their children’s gender or lamented they couldn’t choose because all the viable eggs were one gender. Gender disappointment is normal but the vast majority of people realize the minute their child is born is that they have the child they were meant to have + immense gratitude.


Nice to meet you. Currently pregnant with IVF, opted not to find out the gender before implantation, still don't know and won't find out until birth. Will be happy either way (currently have one daughter).


We opted to be surprised, too.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 10:38     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I've seen this crazy in both directions. It will sound weird to say, but at least when they're chasing a girl it's usually the mom's choice to go through another pregnancy. When the dad is cursing and breaking things at a gender reveal because it's another girl, you just know that uterus is in for another go whether she wants it or not.


I have three girls but hoped for a boy at some point. Obviously I love all my children and am so so so glad they are who they are! Everyone I know who did IVF either chose their children’s gender or lamented they couldn’t choose because all the viable eggs were one gender. Gender disappointment is normal but the vast majority of people realize the minute their child is born is that they have the child they were meant to have + immense gratitude.


Nice to meet you. Currently pregnant with IVF, opted not to find out the gender before implantation, still don't know and won't find out until birth. Will be happy either way (currently have one daughter).
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 10:34     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:Wanting a girl doesn't mean her son's aren't good enough. You don't need to understand her choices, worry about your own.


+1000 this. You really don’t know anyone's story. Stop judging. Figure out your own stuff. Wanting a child of a different gender does not mean you love your children less. Maybe of this mother had a bunch of sons she would want a daughter.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 10:30     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
Anonymous wrote:I've seen this crazy in both directions. It will sound weird to say, but at least when they're chasing a girl it's usually the mom's choice to go through another pregnancy. When the dad is cursing and breaking things at a gender reveal because it's another girl, you just know that uterus is in for another go whether she wants it or not.


I have three girls but hoped for a boy at some point. Obviously I love all my children and am so so so glad they are who they are! Everyone I know who did IVF either chose their children’s gender or lamented they couldn’t choose because all the viable eggs were one gender. Gender disappointment is normal but the vast majority of people realize the minute their child is born is that they have the child they were meant to have + immense gratitude.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 10:28     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
I knew a bunch of people growing up who had 3, 4, 5 girls and then a boy, and stopped. Often the boy was named Dad's Name Jr. I felt bad for the later daughters.
Anonymous
Post 06/17/2024 10:19     Subject: Keep having boys until girl is born
I have seen it more often the other way - trying for a boy.