Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:46     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:One of the college admissions books I read actually suggested setting up a separate email that student AND parents access to use for all the college stuff, keeping it separate from the student’s personal email and making sure important things don’t fall through the cracks. DC is only a rising sophomore but we’ll likely take this advice when we start actively signing up for information.


That is actually a great idea. Do you put this email on college applications and everything college related? Then just edit the email contact at some point toward the end of high school when accepted?


That's what we've done. My understanding is that after acceptance, you get a college email, so that becomes the "real" email contact at the end of the process.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:45     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Kids don’t check email, it’s a huge thing. It’s not just your son, op.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:43     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Congrats OP. Ignore the critics. It is AP exam week and lots of seniors have been cramming for and taking their last AP exams
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:37     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:One of the college admissions books I read actually suggested setting up a separate email that student AND parents access to use for all the college stuff, keeping it separate from the student’s personal email and making sure important things don’t fall through the cracks. DC is only a rising sophomore but we’ll likely take this advice when we start actively signing up for information.


That is actually a great idea. Do you put this email on college applications and everything college related? Then just edit the email contact at some point toward the end of high school when accepted?
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:36     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:Well done op and congrats to your kid.
I monitor my 11th grader's email for the same reasons.

Same here. My kid has ADHD so it’s a necessity.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:29     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:I guess nobody has a recruited athlete. Every single advisor and college coach says to set up a dedicated email for college that parents can access to ensure you don’t miss communications from a coach.

I would guess that 99.9% of kids and parents take their advice.


Of course they’re going to say that if they’re trying to recruit an athlete. They want your kid. They want to make sure you get every single communication.

Regular students aren’t like that. If they don’t get a response, they move to the next kid on the list.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:27     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Well done op and congrats to your kid.
I monitor my 11th grader's email for the same reasons.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:27     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:One of the college admissions books I read actually suggested setting up a separate email that student AND parents access to use for all the college stuff, keeping it separate from the student’s personal email and making sure important things don’t fall through the cracks. DC is only a rising sophomore but we’ll likely take this advice when we start actively signing up for information.


I wish I had done this with my oldest. It all worked out fine in the end but several important emails were missed along the way. I miss emails myself sometimes - it happens!


So who’s double checking your emails?
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:26     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op, play a thought experiment with yourself. If you didn’t check his email- and told him you weren’t going to check it any more- what would have happened to the Chicago email?

Would he have never read it and never gone to Chicago?

Would he have eventually gone through his inbox and gotten the acceptance?

If it’s option B, you know you are babying him the point of crippling him.

If it’s option A, you need to have him meet with a neuropsychologist before college to address his deficits and get him on some meds or something


Actually, she needs to let him have these failures - over and over until he learns. He will fail spectacularly eventually when she can no longer pull him along while hovering from above. The consequences of those failures are possibly much bigger than missing this email. It will mean things like - a lost job, crippled career, numerous parenting fails, divorce, etc. You know, things that have real tangible consequences.


You guys are all idiots. What happened to "some kids take time to mature"? This is one of those things. Let OP do what she thinks is best for her kid. Anytime I see snarky, useless posts like these, I picture an ill-tempered spinster surrounded by a few cats, sipping cheap wine, mouthing each word in a raspy voice as you type. If that's not you, please be nice. If that's you, keep at it.


Sorry to disappoint - 4 kids all successful
medical doctor
law school
Highschool
Elementary school

Some kids do take longer to mature! My kids that did take longer in some areas experienced more failures in those areas along the way. I let them fail when the consequences were small and they learned. I know, novel concept, let your kids learn through the school of hard knocks. I learned this way too.


Yep - it’s called life. PP and OP will be checking their kids emails when they’re 35 because “we thought they were taking long to mature so we just just kept at it…” They’ll never let go. They can’t.
The only way they’re going to mature is if you cut the apron strings and let them fail.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 21:05     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Op, play a thought experiment with yourself. If you didn’t check his email- and told him you weren’t going to check it any more- what would have happened to the Chicago email?

Would he have never read it and never gone to Chicago?

Would he have eventually gone through his inbox and gotten the acceptance?

If it’s option B, you know you are babying him the point of crippling him.

If it’s option A, you need to have him meet with a neuropsychologist before college to address his deficits and get him on some meds or something


Actually, she needs to let him have these failures - over and over until he learns. He will fail spectacularly eventually when she can no longer pull him along while hovering from above. The consequences of those failures are possibly much bigger than missing this email. It will mean things like - a lost job, crippled career, numerous parenting fails, divorce, etc. You know, things that have real tangible consequences.


You guys are all idiots. What happened to "some kids take time to mature"? This is one of those things. Let OP do what she thinks is best for her kid. Anytime I see snarky, useless posts like these, I picture an ill-tempered spinster surrounded by a few cats, sipping cheap wine, mouthing each word in a raspy voice as you type. If that's not you, please be nice. If that's you, keep at it.


Sorry to disappoint - 4 kids all successful
medical doctor
law school
Highschool
Elementary school

Some kids do take longer to mature! My kids that did take longer in some areas experienced more failures in those areas along the way. I let them fail when the consequences were small and they learned. I know, novel concept, let your kids learn through the school of hard knocks. I learned this way too.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 20:58     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:I guess nobody has a recruited athlete. Every single advisor and college coach says to set up a dedicated email for college that parents can access to ensure you don’t miss communications from a coach.

I would guess that 99.9% of kids and parents take their advice.


I have one. In the thick of it junior year and my son didn’t take that advice. It’s driving me bonkers. Once a week I make him sit down and go through his inbox thoroughly and check that he hasn’t missed anything. Occasionally in a fit of tidiness I ask permission to clean it up for him and delete things. He rolls his eyes and hands over his phone. When he gets his hands on my phone he closes all my dozens of open tabs, so I guess we are even.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 20:55     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:One of the college admissions books I read actually suggested setting up a separate email that student AND parents access to use for all the college stuff, keeping it separate from the student’s personal email and making sure important things don’t fall through the cracks. DC is only a rising sophomore but we’ll likely take this advice when we start actively signing up for information.


I wish I had done this with my oldest. It all worked out fine in the end but several important emails were missed along the way. I miss emails myself sometimes - it happens!
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 20:52     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
These replies are ridiculous. Congrats OP!!
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 20:52     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
Anonymous wrote:One of the college admissions books I read actually suggested setting up a separate email that student AND parents access to use for all the college stuff, keeping it separate from the student’s personal email and making sure important things don’t fall through the cracks. DC is only a rising sophomore but we’ll likely take this advice when we start actively signing up for information.


That's what we've done. My child is a junior and it's worked great so far, both to keep her inbox from being flooded with junk and so that I can monitor.
Anonymous
Post 05/15/2024 20:46     Subject: I stalk my DS’s email
I guess nobody has a recruited athlete. Every single advisor and college coach says to set up a dedicated email for college that parents can access to ensure you don’t miss communications from a coach.

I would guess that 99.9% of kids and parents take their advice.